Announcing adoption on Facebook

christine0037 · July 2012

Hi there,

I am new to the boards and I have a question. My DH and I are adopting a little boy who is due to be born in August. We are going back and forth whether or not to post an announcement about our up coming adoption on Facebook. Has anyone posted their upcoming adoption on facebook? If so, did you have a fun way to post it? Did you get any negative feedback?

Thanks!

Christine

c&dwaiting4ourmiracle · July 2012

Congratulations! I still haven't posted anything on FB out of respect for our son's other mommy. For our adoption (placement) we have to wait 10 days for his mommy to go to court and relinquish her parental rights and that's on Monday. When we were matched I just didn't want to announce it and then if the match failed have to explain it. Family and close friends have known about our adoption, but I didn't want to explain it to other not so close friends on FB. In the end I think it's a personal decision with what you feel comfortable.

Best Wishes!

summergirl79 · July 2012

Congrats :-)! We did not make any announcement on FB until after TPR and ICPC clearance, and announced it as heading home as a family of 3 we welcome DS's name...

Art Teacher · July 2012

We didn't post a lot leading up to the adoption. We did post when dd was born. If I had been FB friends with dd's birthmom at that point, I don't know if I would have out of respect for her. I posted when she was born and a few other updates. I wasn't super creative or anything with it -- just a post saying when she was born and her name. I didn't post pics online at all until TPR was signed a month after she was born.

No, we didn't get any negative feedback. I can't imagine you would...I would hope you wouldn't! Are you concerned about a particular family member or friend posting something inappropriate?

Moomere · July 2012

We were not matched before DD's birth but we wanted to let friends know that we were about to adopt.

I posted, "It wasn't so bad, registering at BabiesRUs while not pregnant, for once I was the skinniest chick in the store!"

Some people were like, why the heck were registering if you aren't pregnant, and I replied, "Because we are so excited to be adopting!"

Once we were matched and met DD (all in the same 24 hour period) I waiting until the TPR was up and announced it on FB with pics, etc.

Congratulations and good luck!!!

Robby6 · July 2012

We did not post until DS was home with us. Nothing fancy for us.

hway24 · July 2012

We posted on facebook shortly after we were matched. That was in Sep, and DS was born in Nov. DH and I each posted something. I don't remember exactly what we each wrote, it was along the lines of "We finally got the call we've been waiting for! We are excited to announce that we have been chosen by a BM and are adopting a baby boy through infant adoption, the due date is Nov 20, and we are very excited to finally become a family of 3. We'll keep everyone updated as we get updates and more info." When BM sent us an ultrasound pic, I posted that on there too.

I was so excited to finally make a "pregnancy" anouncement and share u/s pics after enduring so many of them from other friends!

We received nothing but positive feedback, and excitement for us. We were pretty open with our family and friends throughtout our journey with IF and adoption, and everyone was always really supportive.

jackieo1309 · July 2012

We never posted an announcement to say we are adopting, but have posted the adoption photos we took and maybe mentioned a couple things relating to it. We got nothing but positive feedback on FB (not always the case when telling people in person...). I don't think we will post when we eventually get matched though- it depends on the situation. We also don't have 8000 FB friends like some people do, so I felt a little more comfortable posting the few things we have already.

orangecupcake · July 2012

We didn't post anything before or after we were matched- I was too afraid something would go wrong and didn't want to announce the fallout.

We posted our first family of 3 photo after TPR. It was funny to see the comments of "I didn't know you were pregnant!" of course I explained what was going on.

IRR · July 2012

We haven't posted anything on FB about being matched and will wait until the TPR before we post any announcement/photos. We have been telling close family and friends about it with the caveat that nothing is final until 72 hours after birth. Our BM has already friended me on FB so I think she is hoping that we post photos on a regular basis so she can see them. Congrats on your adoption.

christine0037 · July 2012

Hi Everyone,

Thank you for your feedback. I think I will wait until after the TPR. We just had a visit with the BM yesterday. Even though everything is going well we still are nervous that she may change her mind once she holds him. If this were to happen it would be really hard emotionally to go back and explain on FB.

Jermysgirl · July 2012

We didn't say anything until we picked them up. I didn't want to jinx it and have to go back and tell everyone it didn't happen.

When we picked up DS, I posted his picture and said "So, guess what we did today!" and I think the internet exploded.

erinmc1 · July 2012

We were pretty open about our intent to adopt, but we don't have a whole lot of friends on facebook who aren't friends in real life. I initially posted something like "God observed that I lack patience, so he called me to adopt." And since then, we've put up a link to our blog (I got a few facebook responses re: our infertility diagnosis from people who actually read the blog, but we never announced that on facebook outright), a post or two about getting the nursery ready, and some vague posts alluding to waiting to hear the results of profile submissions. I've found that our friends have been very supportive and interested. It's nice to have so many people rooting for us.

A few friends have actually posted in response that they are struggling with infertility and considering adoption, too.

As for when we're actually matched, I don't know yet. I like to think we'll have the patience not to shout it from the rooftops, but it's going to be a real challenge to keep that under wraps.

francophonia · July 2012

When BM was about 7 months, we posted that we were expecting, but we didn't post any specifics on how, just that we were expecting. It was a picture . Quite a few people assumed we were pregnant, and some people asked us how we were pregnant, if we were doing a surrogate, AI, or adopting, but we didn't respond. We wanted to respect BM, and only after she was born and came home did we say that we adopted.

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