Guilty feelings getting rid of lovey?

ilove613 · July 2012

Hi,

My 10 month old has a giraffe lovey since he was born. We only allow him to have it in his crib or on long car trips. Lately he's been throwing it out of his crib in the morning (at 6:15am) and then cries for it. Additionally, I've been reading that it's good to get rid of the lovey sooner than later. The problem: I feel too guilty! His face lights up at the sight of his lovey! Not to mention that he falls fast asleep as soon as he has it Anyone else had these feelings??

bluejetta · July 2012

I hadn't read anything about getting rid of them and plan to let LO keep it as long as she likes but I totally understand not wanting to get stuck in a "I throw it you get it" game at 6am.

TeacherVicky · July 2012

I'm not sure why you would want to get rid of his lovey, it's a comfort item for him. I think comfort items are incredibly important at this age and even for a while now. I don't see the big deal in a giraffe lovey being around for the next few years. It could be worse!

Maybe he is ready to get up for the day at that time? Does he go back to sleep when you give it back?

ilove613 · July 2012

No, he doesn't go back to sleep but will cry in his crib until someone gets it for him. Otherwise he used to play in his crib until around 7am

I read that the older the baby, the harder it is to get rid of items like pacifiers, bottles, loveys etc. He doesn't use a paci and we've begun the sippy cup practice, but still not wanting to let go of the lovey - US parents AND baby!

memali26 · July 2012

Many children don't even get attached to a lovey until after their first birthday (DD1 was about 18 months before she ever chose one, and now has 4 bedtime friends) and many keep it until they're 3 or 4 or even later. I don't think it's a habit that needs to be broken like a bottle or nuk. It's a GOOD thing to have a transitional object/comfort object when they're little!

TeacherVicky · July 2012

ilove613:
No, he doesn't go back to sleep but will cry in his crib until someone gets it for him. Otherwise he used to play in his crib until around 7am I read that the older the baby, the harder it is to get rid of items like pacifiers, bottles, loveys etc. He doesn't use a paci and we've begun the sippy cup practice, but still not wanting to let go of the lovey - US parents AND baby!

Then don't get rid of it.

Either go get it for him and then return to bed until 7, or let him cry. Or get up at that time.

I get getting rid of the paci early (we are in this boat/dilemma), but I don't see the big deal in keeping a lovey around for a while.

PurpleDrewbie5 · July 2012

ilove613:
No, he doesn't go back to sleep but will cry in his crib until someone gets it for him. Otherwise he used to play in his crib until around 7am I read that the older the baby, the harder it is to get rid of items like pacifiers, bottles, loveys etc. He doesn't use a paci and we've begun the sippy cup practice, but still not wanting to let go of the lovey - US parents AND baby!

My daughter is 9mo. She's never had a bottle at night. She used a paci until about 7mo and she stopped on her own. She has a silky blanket that she snuggles with. I understand your apprehension letting your LO keep the Lovie but really, a bed time snuggle buddy is not so bad. My 2.5year old nephew has a blanket he sleeps with. As long as he has his blanket he can sleep anywhere, in the car, at grandparent's house, in a hotel, on vacation etc. He doesn't carry it around during the day or hold it when he eats, just when he goes to sleep. IMO I don't think there is anything wrong with a toddler having a Lovie/blanket etc. for comfort. I wouldn't take it away. However, I certainly wouldn't go in every morning to get it!

ilove613 · July 2012

Thanks everyone! Getting support from other moms without feeling guilty about letting him keep it really helps!

chibride4 · July 2012

TeacherVicky:

I'm not sure why you would want to get rid of his lovey, it's a comfort item for him. I think comfort items are incredibly important at this age and even for a while now. I don't see the big deal in a giraffe lovey being around for the next few years. It could be worse!

Maybe he is ready to get up for the day at that time? Does he go back to sleep when you give it back?

This. The true benefits of a lovey come much later, like during DS's first overnight at grandma's and trips to the doctor. They provide a lot of comfort, stability and familiarity that parents often can't. My oldest's lovey -- aptly named Lovey -- has truly become a member of our family. Even at 4.5, we have no plans to wean him... it'll eventually happen on its own. Or go to college with him.

smilelari · July 2012

6:15 is a perfectly normal wake up time. He probably just wants to get up for the day. No need to get rid of the lovey

dairygirl19 · July 2012

I would not get rid of the lovey either.

Hell, I'm trying to get my kid to HAVE a lovey. I'm it lately.

ElatedMom2B · July 2012

I wouldn't - I didn't. DD#1 is going to be 4 in two weeks and still sleeps with about five!! She doesn't take them all over the place with her (some kids won't leave the house with them) as we always told her they were for bed. She loves them...hippo, lamby, ducky, nemo and baby ducky! They are a part of our family! LOL

As for the issue of throwing it out of the bed and crying - my suggestion is just to correct that behavior. LO could become attached to a blanky or something else and just keep doing that with another item.

Elizabeth043086 · July 2012

Why on earth would you get rid of his lovey. I wouldn't. I have my fav stuffed animal since I was a baby still. So what?

Guilty feelings getting rid of lovey?

Re: Guilty feelings getting rid of lovey?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards