Anyone thinking about becoming a SAHM?

Funnygirl34 · July 2012

I know I still have several months to go before the baby is born but I already can't imagine going back to work after. I would LOVE to be a SAHM but am just not sure we can financially do it on just my husband's salary. Is anyone else toying with the SAHM idea? What are you doing in the meantime to see if you can do it?

sucrets4 · July 2012

Why don't you try putting all of your salary in savings and seeing if you can make it on DH's salary? We always live up to our means, so if you don't see that money in your checking account you might make the appropriate cuts.

I stay home with DD, but after we moved (DD was ~4m), I started teaching a class at DH's college and some private lessons. My life is absolutely perfect for me right now. I'm so glad I have small professional outlets but love getting to spend so much other time with DD.

MrsNiner · July 2012

For a few months, try putting all of your paycheck into savings and living off of your H's. See where you can cut corners to save money (meal planning, no cable/satellite, becoming a one-car family, etc). We have cut back on a lot for me to be able to SAH with our child. We only have internet and Netflix for entertainment, I meal plan like a crazy person so our grocery bill is around $60 a week, I try to run all errands at once to save on gas, we cloth diaper, and I do have a 10-12 hour a week job a few nights to bring in extra cash (we also get a free gym membership out of it).

If your H's salary allows it and it works for your family, cutting back and sacrificing some luxuries is definitely worth being able to stay home.

Sparkles01 · July 2012

I would love to considering the cost of daycare around here is so astronomical I'll only be bringing home a couple hundred dollars a week after. But H reminded me of all the things that come out of my check before I ever see it that add up... My commuting costs, my 401k, our insurance.

All of that stuff adds up to be a lot more, so at this point I think it would be most responsible for me to stay at my job and continue to put money into savings for when we decide to move out of the city- hopefully then I'll be able to SAH.

ccreagh · July 2012

I wish!

I am a teacher and expecting my bundle of joy in early March. So, my plan is to take my 6 weeks paid maternity leave, take an additional 6 weeks off with no pay, and then I'll be off for the summer (paid).

I've given this a lot of thought and I don't think I'll be able to stay home with the baby after the summer. My husband and I depend on that money too much.

aWm2010 · July 2012

I wish! I always wanted to stay home with my babies until they were older. We cannot live off just H's salery. He pays a crap load of child support each week even though they have joint custody (he bought his custody). It's worth it though. If in the future we can afford for me to be part time I would love it, but am not holding my breath for that to happen anytime in the near future.

LiteraryFoodie · July 2012

I'm currently a homemaker and will continue to be home after our baby is born. I've been at home for about a year now, so we know we can live off MH's salary.

MH doesn't make a ton of money but we've simplified our lives to accommodate me being at home. We are so much happier with our lifestyle now that I'm home. There is more time and a lot less stress. We started working Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover about a year or so ago. That helped us to get our finances in order, live below our means, pay off our debt, and in particular to meet all our needs on one salary. Honestly, I feel more financially secure knowing that we've adjusted our lifestyle to live easily within our means.

With that said, we don't take big vacations, we don't have fancy TV's, phones, or other gadgets, we don't have new cars or the trendiest clothes, we don't live in a big house or have lots of nice furniture, we don't belong to a gym, I don't get my nails done. I cook from scratch, we "upcycle" a lot, and find other ways to save money and live a more sustainable lifestyle.

I think that living on one income is totally possible for lots of people, but in most cases it takes at least some sacrifice. We thought those sacrifices were worth the lifestyle change that me at home would accord. For others it isn't worth it and/or both spouses are better people and better parents when they are both working. Each family needs to make the decision that's best for them.

CloudBee · July 2012

I would love to! Unfortunately my husband does not support the idea. Though we could live comfortably on his salary alone, he likes the security two incomes bring. Then there's my building retirement, and the ability for us to continue investing. We travel often, and he doesn't want that aspect of our life to change much post-kids. We've talked about it a lot, and I'm not willing to give that up either. So - I will work, but during our time off, we'll be jetting to visit family in Paris, etc. Goodness I'm looking forward to having this baby! I can't wait to experience life with them.

Mindish · July 2012

I am! And pretty much what everyone else said...we have been living off what my husband makes for several months to be sure we could do it. For us it's worth cutting things out of our budget that we don't really need (like cable).

The sucky thing if you have a job like mine (speech pathologist) is that if I ever want to go back to work I have to make sure I keep all my licenses and certifications up to date with continuing Ed when I'm not working. :-/

Good luck!

Mother Meghan · July 2012

I'm definitely thinking about it. I may go to half time if the opportunity arises. Right now we're paying down our credit cards and putting money in savings. In a few months we might try making it on DH's salary alone, we shall see.

thecarrotflower · July 2012

My husband has been a student and will start his job come September, so we have been living off of my income for the past almost two years. He will be making more than I make now. We will probably start putting mine in savings once he starts his position and once baby arrives in March I am planning on being a stay at home mommy. That said, if the need arises that I need to start bringing in some money we have talked about me possibly babysitting a child or two at home with our little one.

RibbitGrl930 · July 2012

I have thought about it, as I would love to be able to stay home with the kidlets!

Basically, the rule of thumb that I have heard as to whether or not you should be a SAHM (from a financial standpoint) is if childcare will cost about as much as or more than your income every month. If you would essentially be giving up your paycheck every month just to have someone watch your child, it would actually be cheaper for you to do the watching yourself. You'd not only save the base cost of childcare, but any potential extra costs such as when you're running late and have to pay extra. You would obviously have to cut costs in other ways, obviously, but it really would be cheaper to just stay at home.

MamaMollyMoo · July 2012

I resigned from my teaching position when my first was born. We saved much of my salary the year leading up to it. The savings didn't last long but I have taken in another little guy and it makes the ends meet.

We live completely differently than we did before, it is a sacrifice.

gundy21 · July 2012

We are seriously considering the opposite - DH staying home. I make way more than he does and we can live comfortably on my salary.

JillSandm · July 2012

Just echoing others - Being a SAHM is wonderful, but you're probably going to have to make some sacrifices to your current lifestyle. We are fortunate to live in an area where most moms are SAHM, so our lifestyle isn't *that much* different from others.

For entertainment, we have potluck dinners at our house every other Saturday. That keeps the cost of "going out to dinner" down, but since I'm not having to prepare much of the food (and my friends clean up my kitchen since I've hosted), it still feels like going out. We feed the kids early (at 6pm or so), then send the dads out to deliver the kids to the sitter (which we all chip in for) so that we adults can have time without all the kiddos. We also have a monthly card club for which we get our own sitters, but still do appetizers and drinks.

Like a PP, we use Dave Ramsey's principles for budgeting, paying down debt, etc. Part of our "plan" includes using his envelope system for everything other than regular bills. On payday, I get cash from the bank and put our agreed-upon amount in various envelopes to use for the next two weeks. It has been statistically proven that people spend less if they pay in cash.

Oh, I could go on and on about making it on one income. If anyone's interested, I would highly suggest Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover" or his class that is available just about anywhere (usually held at a church) called, "Financial Peace University." Google him, and you'll find so much information!

SamanthaKate85 · July 2012

In a dream world I would be a SAHM, and maybe someday I will get the chance. As of now we are hoping for me to go part time down to 2 or 3 days a week. My husband is a youth pastor so we're not exactly rolling in the dough. We already only have netflix and no car loans or anything. Other than our mortgage, which is about the same as the cost to rent, we are working to pay down school loans and that's it. So, even though we're willing to cut out more there is not too much left. Maybe our smart phones? This is one I'm trying to get DH to think about giving up.

I'm hoping to start putting half of my pay every month into savings to get a better idea of what it will be like.

MamaMollyMoo · July 2012

My smartphone is the only thing I won't give up, lol. I think you will really want it for those late night feedings!

00jennifer00 · July 2012

I knew when I got pg with my first that there was no way I'd be going back to work. I couldn't imagine someone else witnessing all his firsts instead of me. Living simply sucks sometimes, and you can definitely get stuck with the "keeping up with the Jones'" attitude and sulk sometimes, but it's worth it. When my husband went to school fulltime (and was working fulltime, but it was just minimum wage) I had a small in home daycare. It was hard work having a bunch of 1yos running around (it's funny how it worked out, all the kids were within 9mo of my son's age) and having no car or freedom to go anywhere during the day, but I'd have rather been trapped at home than away from my son. We had to budget to the squeaky penny for a good year and a half, but thankfully after my husband finished school his new job was enough to support us, otherwise I would have tried to have a daycare again. But we still go without things like cable and new vehicles and expensive stylish clothes. We paid less than $2k for both of our vehicles with tax money.

FutureMrsPrestwood · July 2012

My DD will be 3 in October and I have worked since she was 6 weeks old. It was VERY hard to leave her when she was a newborn, one of the hardest things I have ever done. That said, it just wasn't financially feasible for us at the time. As hard as it was in the beginning, it got easier, we settled into a schedule and we are all very happy now. My daughter loves her school, and we haven't had the additional stress of financial worries that we would have had if I had stayed home at the time. I say all this only to put your mind at ease in case you do end up being a working mom. You can do it and it will be okay.

I am planning to stay home after this next baby is born. My salary would basically be going towards paying for daycare for 2, little to nothing left over (not to mention my 30 minute commute one way, so gas and wear and tear on the car), and we are now in a financially secure place that makes this possible.

I would sit down and look very seriously at your budget and expenses. Also, it may help to try living only off your DH's salary for a month or two-- because it looks and feels one way on paper and feels completely different when you are actually living it.

ETA: Wording

JAH12 · July 2012

We are planning to have me go part time after baby #2 arrives in March. I currently work full time as a tax processing specialist at a national accounting firm. It is going to be too much once the 2nd baby comes along. DH is a fire fighter and works shift work so we currently only need part time care for my 22 month old.

We are going to need to cut back on a lot of things, but you gotta do what you gotta do! We are also are going to start trying to live off of just his salary now, which is going to be tough, but we will have to manage! He will be picking up another part time job as well, so we will make it, but will just have to live a little more frugal.

leneae10 · July 2012

I can't really add much, there are TONS of great points here, but I just want to add my perspective. I SAH when I became pg with my son (at 18w) because of the high risk nature of the pregnancy. We had planned for me to SAH anyway but we just did it a little sooner. Then he was born early and was sick and spent a month between NICU and Children's Hospital. If I had been going back to work, it would have been the day he FINALLY came home for good!

Sometimes life hands us curveballs. I know many women who had wholeheartedly planned on going back to work who had sick NICU babies for months and ended up making SAH work for them. For us, with two more on the way, my entire paycheck would go to daycare, no matter how many days I have where I'm sure I'll want to send them all there. LOL.

It's no picnic everyday, though, either. It's hard and demanding, especially the more kids you add to the mix. YOu'll find a way to make your decision work.

allieway02 · July 2012

I plan on moving from full time to part time. I cant fathem the idea of sticking my child into the crap day cares that we have here in town.

Want a personalized experience?

Anyone thinking about becoming a SAHM?

Re: Anyone thinking about becoming a SAHM?

Me: 30, DH: 33 Married 8/3/08
BFP 7/16/2012 (8th cycle), EDD 3/27/2012, Delivered 3/24/2013 - IT'S A BOY!

Choose Another Board

Search Boards

Want a personalized experience?

Anyone thinking about becoming a SAHM?

Re: Anyone thinking about becoming a SAHM?

Me: 30, DH: 33 Married 8/3/08 BFP 7/16/2012 (8th cycle), EDD 3/27/2012, Delivered 3/24/2013 - IT'S A BOY!

Choose Another Board

Search Boards

Me: 30, DH: 33 Married 8/3/08
BFP 7/16/2012 (8th cycle), EDD 3/27/2012, Delivered 3/24/2013 - IT'S A BOY!