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March 2013 Moms
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Anyone else with another baby freaking out?

Texasbride109Texasbride109 member
in March 2013 Moms

Don't get me wrong I am SUPER HAPPY!

However, I am also a bit sad or worried or maybe its my hormones. 

We have a 10 month old darling baby girl. Am I robing of her time with us by having another baby so fast? Does this make sense?

I am close to 40 so this is why we started trying for baby #2 wanted to be finished by the time I am 40.

I am feeling bad today for baby #1.

Also I fear having two kiddos 18 months apart going to be hard and I work full time.

Again....I am so happy, but can anyone talk to me who has been in the place I am in?

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Re: Anyone else with another baby freaking out?

  • magel050485magel050485

    Your daughter won't remember the time she had alone with you, but sunsequent children won't have any alone time with you.

    Your love will multiply when you have your second child.  Plus, your daughter will have a best friend growing up.

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  • Texasbride109Texasbride109 member

    I guess the sibling part is maybe why I am having a hard time. My sister who is 2 years older then me was and still is VERY mean to me.

    I never had that sibling love from her. I see  friends who adore these siblings and I have always longed for that.

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  • jllmb79jllmb79 member

    baby #1 got my undivided attention

    I feel for baby #2 because I won't be able to just sit and hold them all day long like I did with #1.   

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  • Sarai28Sarai28
    imagemagel050485:

    Your daughter won't remember the time she had alone with you, but sunsequent children won't have any alone time with you.

    Your love will multiply when you have your second child.  Plus, your daughter will have a best friend growing up.

    I love this!  Yes, I have felt the same way.  Our kids will be exactly 2 years apart.  I know it's not super close, but I still feel like I'm taking something from him.  I guess I will have to remind myself of the pp that he will have a best friend to grow up with.  Also, the two under two board would probably be very helpful!

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  • leneae10leneae10 member
    Yep, freaking out!
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    Twin boys born too early at 17w4d and 18w2d in February 2010
    Transabdominal cerclage placed September 2010
    DS born at 35w1d in February 2011
    Twin girls born at exactly 36w in February 2013
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  • ElocinElocin member
    Totally. When I had my cp last cycle, all I could think about was what I was taking away from DD. Of course, when I finally got over those feelings, I started bleeding. With this +, I've been able to focus on how I'm giving DD a gift. I totally understand where you're coming from. I'll be 38 when this baby is born and we did want two close together. It's just crazy that it's really happening! 
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  • BabyKnight1030BabyKnight1030 member

    Don't freak out :) If you raise your children to work together and help each other out then you should have not worries about splitting your attention and time. My brother and I are 11 months apart and we are best friends. The only times we really bickered was during the month we were the same age and that was only because my parents would let my brother have the same privileges as I had even though I was "older" :)

    Hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy!!!! 

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  • MRS.NICOLINAMRS.NICOLINA member
    I felt this way when I had my second.  Now I feel this way about having my third.  It will work itself out and kids will love having a playmate.  At least mine do!
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  • whitk85whitk85 member
    imageTexasbride109:

    I guess the sibling part is maybe why I am having a hard time. My sister who is 2 years older then me was and still is VERY mean to me.

    I never had that sibling love from her. I see  friends who adore these siblings and I have always longed for that.

     My sister and I are two years apart always have and always will be best friends. We often joke that we should have just been twins. Also, we are pretty sure we have a telepathic connection. Anyways, my plan in for two under two....if it works out that way because I hope my children can have the same relationship my sister and I do.  

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  • APrice4UTAPrice4UT member

    After living this for the last year and a half, this is what I think:

    1. My 1st child is so in love with his sister.  I cannot believe how much she has filled his life with happiness.  And the feelings are the same for her.  I often say that she is the best gift I could have ever given my son.

    2. #2 definitely gets less one on one attention, but that doesn't mean they get less attention in general.  In fact, she probably gets more since someone (mom, dad, bro) is always playing with her.  And they don't know any different.  They adapt and they still thrive.

    I'm thrilled to see my daughter become a big sister.  It's probably what I am most excited about. 

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  • APrice4UTAPrice4UT member

    imageleneae10:
    Yep, freaking out!

    Okay, well you're situation is different.  I'd be freaking out too, haha!  :)

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  • Baby_CrazyBaby_Crazy member
    imageAPrice4UT:

    After living this for the last year and a half, this is what I think:

    1. My 1st child is so in love with his sister.  I cannot believe how much she has filled his life with happiness.  And the feelings are the same for her.  I often say that she is the best gift I could have ever given my son.

    2. #2 definitely gets less one on one attention, but that doesn't mean they get less attention in general.  In fact, she probably gets more since someone (mom, dad, bro) is always playing with her.  And they don't know any different.  They adapt and they still thrive.

    I'm thrilled to see my daughter become a big sister.  It's probably what I am most excited about. 

     

    I think you described it perfectly.  I personally went through a grieving period, though, for the loss of the one-on-one time I had with DD. But, I also suffered from PPD after DS was born, which I think drove most of those feelings.  

    I guess what I'm trying to say is I think it's natural to experience some sadness for the change in the relationship with your first, but it's incredible and so fulfilling to watch your children build their relationships with one another. And there always seems to be plenty of love to go around. :-) 

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  • Texasbride109Texasbride109 member
    I had massive PPD - I think that's what freaking me out and driving these fears.
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  • Baby_CrazyBaby_Crazy member

    imageTexasbride109:
    I had massive PPD - I think that's what freaking me out and driving these fears.

     I hear ya.  The PPD nearly scared me into not having any more.  I didn't realize until 4 months after DS was born, exactly what my problem was.  Now that I know what to look for, I'm hoping I'll be able to spot it sooner if it happens again.   

    Feel free to PM me anytime you need to have a freak out session.  I totally understand.  :-)

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