wedding 2 weeks before due date - WWYD?

LilBlkDress1 · July 2012

We've been invited to a friends wedding two weeks before my due date. It's only about a 20-30 minute drive from both home and the hospital so I'm thinking I should be fine to go.

My only thing is I don't want to screw over the bride and groom and RSVP yes and then have the baby come early and not be able to come.

What would you do? Would you go? Would you stay home? Would you explain to them that you would go but if the baby does decide to make an early arrival you'd have to stay home (and obviously send a gift to still cover the plate cost)?

ccam · July 2012

If it was a good friend and I really wanted to be there - I would just explain that unless the baby decides to come early, you will be there. It might be nice to get dressed up and out of the house with your SO for the night!

teddyballgame · July 2012

Go and have fun! They'll understand if you're not there.

mrs.kapow · July 2012

ccam:
If it was a good friend and I really wanted to be there - I would just explain that unless the baby decides to come early, you will be there. It might be nice to get dressed up and out of the house with your SO for the night!

This.

We had to do that when I was pregnant with DD and my friend was very understanding.

GreenMonkey1 · July 2012

We went to a wedding about 2-weeks before my due date and it was fine. The bride and the groom knew that we might have to bail at the last minute if the baby decided to come early. If the bride/groom were not close friends/family I might have just RSVP'd "no" so as not to risk it, but these were close friends and they understood. They were really happy we came to the wedding so close to our due date.

LilBlkDress1 · July 2012

MelRC117:
I went to a friend's wedding on Saturday...one week from my due date and about 30 minutes from the hospital. They were fully aware I was pregnant. DH just let them know that we will both be there, provided that I wasn't in labor and didn't have the baby yet. If the baby was already here and I was back at home the plan was for just DH to go since they are pretty good friends. I think just give them a heads up that you will be there as long as baby stays put. If LO has a different plan, send the gift instead.

Thanks! This makes me feel much better about going.

smile50208 · July 2012

I just had a wedding this past weekend 3 weeks before my due date. It happened to be my husband's brother so I didn't have much a choice. The doctor gave me clearance since the wedding was only 20 min from the hospital. Luckily, no problems. I also have 2 weddings 4 weeks after my due date. The one I responded as I plan on being there unless something drastic and unexpected comes up. The other hasn't sent out the invitations yet but plan on sending in the same response card.

As long as you explain yourself, you should be fine RSVP yes. If baby comes early, let them know and send the gift. The bride and groom should understand.

If you aren't comfortable with that, speak to the bride and/or groom. Tell them you would like to come and see how they feel about you not showing up if the baby is early.

bdbelladonna · July 2012

i'd plan to go. your friend knows you are pregnant and should realize that baby's schedule might mean you end up not making the wedding or you may have to leave. During the ceremony I'd probably choose to sit in the back close to an excit just in case you need to leave or get up to stretch your legs.

LilBlkDress1 · July 2012

Thanks everyone, this helps a lot.

I'll talk to the groom today to give him the heads up and then RSVP yes.

Momof2121511 · July 2012

We went to a wedding 2 weeks before my due date too. I was already scheduled for a c-section so we knew when the baby was coming as long as he didn't have other plans. It felt great to get all dressed up and get my hair done but I kinda dreaded spending so much on a dress that I was only going to wear once. I would say go and just explain that if you are not there, its because the baby had different plans. I'm sure they will understand. Have fun before you are too busy with the baby and are not able to do anything for a little while.

dmfan897 · July 2012

My brother is getting married when I am 38wks and I am def going. I would rsvp yes because if you say no..chances are you will still be pregnant that night, sitting at home wishing you were there.

kjskjs · July 2012

My best friend is getting married about 3 weeks after my due date and I rsvp'ed that yes we would be there pending the arrival of our little girl. I've had conversations with my friend about how it'll all depend on when exactly she comes and how I'm feeling. I say just talk to the bride and groom and plan to go.

bigbootyjudi · July 2012

This is my exact situation, only the wedding is one of my best friend's and is a week after my due date. I told her we wouldn't be there and she understood. I found out I was pregnant a few days before she got engaged/decided on a date, so she knew from the beginning that I probably wouldn't make it. I don't feel comfortable leaving a one week old with anyone except for my mom and she's going to a concert that she bought tickets for a year ago that day. I told her I would go to the wedding ceremony, since it's outside, if it wasn't too warm and if I was in the "swing" of things. I'm a FTM and all I've heard about is how the first week is extremely hard adjustment-wise.

LilyPotter218 · July 2012

I'd RSVP to be there. If something changes, hope they are understanding enough not to be pissed. And of course, if you can't be there, let them know as soon as you know so they can possibly prepare.

2 weeks before my EDD I had a 2 week old

watkinae · July 2012

I would go. Maybe write on the RSVP "So long as baby doesn't come early" just to warn the bride that it's always a possibility.

sweetiebird726 · July 2012

Thi

Wally3 · July 2012

As others said just RSVP yes but make sure they know you are pg and if something comes up you will let them know.

Cdienst · July 2012

I would go and dance that baby right out

LilBlkDress1 · July 2012

Cdienst:
I would go and dance that baby right out

haha now THAT's a plan!

Hyaline · July 2012

We've had to do this a couple times due to my husband's military training schedule--we will literally not know until a week or two out if he'll be gone, and people have been really understanding on that point. If they're good friends, they'd probably rather have a shot at seeing you and having you there to celebrate than having you say no just in case--but just ask and see what they say

(If you think about it, people have last-minute stuff come up all the time--they get sick or have jobs that call them in unexpectedly. So baby coming early kinda falls in that category

).

melody921 · July 2012

I would reply "yes" with the understanding that if LO arrives early, you obviously won't be making it. I think they'll get that. Besides, it will be fun for you to get out one last time before baby.

JustAhopin · July 2012

Go. If you're not there it's not going to break them. They'll understand. They might even have some guest that come that never RSVP or said No and show up.

BransonsBecca · July 2012

I'm due about two weeks from today. We were invited to a wedding that happened this past Sunday. I would have been fine going- but it was outside and I passed on it due to the heat wave we've been having.

If you're a FTM, you'll probably be ok, since most FTM go into labor closer to their due date. But again, you actually might be more uncomfortable than actually being at risk of going into labor! Sitting is tough around 38 weeks!

KaylaC0514 · July 2012

My best friend of 12 years is getting married 10 days before my due date. The way i've been feeling lately, I dont think I can make it. Its over an hour from our home and almost 2 hours to the hospital.

In your situation, I would probably at least plan on going to the ceremony. Talk to her about the plate cost and see what she reccommends

LyndseylovesHugh · July 2012

I had a friend who was very pregnant around my wedding and I always knew, without her having to say anything, that there was a chance she would not be there. I would have totally understood if she just did not feel up to coming that day because it was so close to her due date. She went into labor early and missed the wedding, no big deal at all. Friends will totally understand and know that delivering a healthy baby is top priority.

Ladiebug710 · July 2012

I would go. She knows you are pregnant and if the baby comes early and you can't make it to the wedding I'm sure she will understand.

jenikas · July 2012

My due date was Sunday...and my hubby and I were IN a wedding on Saturday! The bride and groom were 2 of our best friends, so we told them that we'd be there unless we were in the hospital! Everything worked out fine, obviously...we're still waiting on the little one! It also felt nice to get dressed up, like some others have said!

If you dont end up being able to make it, they will totally understand...you will in no way be "screwing them over"...and I don't think you even need to explain that if the baby comes early you wont be there...i think that's a given!

Have fun!

RockyMtnMama · July 2012

I'd go, but just write-in under the RSVP that you'll let her know if you have the baby early and can't make it.

They'll understand - it's not like you're avoiding going b/c you didn't feel like it.

AprilAngie · July 2012

I have a wedding two weeks after my DD and two weeks before my DD too. My friend is renewing her vows 2 weeks before. i lined up a sitter for my other kids- and she is my BFF- however I just said If I have the baby before or in labour- sorry I cant attend. They have to understand,.

The wedding 2 weeks after (its my boss') and I said I will come to the ceremony but depending when I give birth as it can be 1 week if I have to be induced- then I don't think I will attend the reception.

Like I said- they will understand.

overtonhayes · July 2012

Go! I'm actually going to a wedding an hour away from home this weekend, and baby is due the week after. I'm taking my hospital bag with me just in case, and I've checked out local hopsitals who accept my insurance in the area.

Besides, if you do have to miss the wedding, the bride and groom will understand!

MississippiCatfish · July 2012

I also vote that you should go! One of my good friends went to a wedding not long before her due date, danced up a storm, and went into labor a few hours after she got home!

Jenelle101 · July 2012

ccam:
If it was a good friend and I really wanted to be there - I would just explain that unless the baby decides to come early, you will be there. It might be nice to get dressed up and out of the house with your SO for the night!

This. I was actually IN my best friend's wedding a week before I had DD. It was insane! But luckily, DD stayed put and I enjoyed dancing and having a good time with friends. I say go for it. Just let them know ahead of time that you might not make it. I'm sure they'll understand.

christyhal · July 2012

Cdienst:
I would go and dance that baby right out

You never know...this is exactly how my MIL got her labor with my DH started! Danced at her brother's wedding, and had DH the next day!

As long as you give the bride and groom a heads up that you'll be there unless baby has other plans, I would go! If baby does have other plans, I would be sure to let them know as soon as possible of the change in RSVP so they can make changes on their end if necessary.

tinyhumantoe · July 2012

If you want to go, RSVP yes. If you want an excuse not to go, let her know you are at risk of delivering early. Unless you aren't a dirty liar like me.... in that case, RSVP yes regardless.

babypaloozyvan · July 2012

teddyballgame:
Go and have fun! They'll understand if you're not there.

This.

Worcbride · July 2012

I had that happen at my wedding--baby came early (the day before actually). I was so happy for them I could've cared less that they missed the wedding.

Eveanyn · July 2012

I have some friends getting married 12 days before my EDD, but they're in Canada, about a 3-hour drive away, so we RSVPd no. If they're only 30-40 minutes away, it just depends on how comfortable you'll be. Really think about how you usually feel at weddings and if you get uncomfortable easily I would say don't go. Your friend should understand.

Jenniefer2008 · July 2012

I completely agree with Lyndsey. Go and have fun. I don't think there is any need to explain anything. She knows your pregnant and I'm sure she will be completely understanding if you don't show. As far as being concerned about the plate cost, honestly, I wouldn't be. I too am married and this would have never crossed my mind. You typically have extra people show up anyways, so more food to go around.

Go and get your party on!!!

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