"She must be spoiled"

Heather2256 · July 2012

I am so tired of people saying my baby must be spoiled. I mean really. Sorry that I, ya know, comfort my child when she's upset!!

mkflower3000 · July 2012

How can anyone say that about a 2 month old?? Ridiculous!

stemms8810 · July 2012

That is dumb. You cannot spoil a little baby! They need comfort for many different reasons.

tjkdlhb · July 2012

You don't spoil a baby. They need food, to be clean and to be loved. That's all they ask of you. How can you spoil them by giving them that? comforting a baby when they are upset leads to better trust and attachment. and teaches them that they are loved and they can trust their parents. Leaving them to cry is in no way beneficial. You spoil children when they are older and have tantrums to get toys/candy etc.

It drives me crazy when people say that to me!

The other one is "let her stretch her lungs" grrr

EmilyXLC · July 2012

I get that a lot, too.

I mean, my son rarely fusses or cries... & when he does, it's because he is uncomfortable or hungry or hurting... What point is there in letting him cry & get himself worked up?

Ridiculous.

Heather2256 · July 2012

tjkdlhb:
The other one is "let her stretch her lungs" grrr

Yeah I get "let her cry - it helps her lungs gets strong". It's just like WTF?!?

willadieselstm · July 2012

I hate this. I hear it a lot. DS wants to be held or he screams. What am I suppose to do?

tjkdlhb · July 2012

schemrich:
I hate this. I hear it a lot. DS wants to be held or he screams. What am I suppose to do?

Smile You're supposed to pick him up and cuddle him. He won't want to be held forever...enjoy it while you can!

ElinJ · July 2012

Yes

Exactly, would they rather hear my child SCREAM BLOODY MURDER? Because I don't want to hear that.

ETA: Oh and "It's good for them to cry." Indifferent

DrRx · July 2012

I hate this too! Same thing about letting her cry to help her lungs!

<Gasp> You mean I can't baby my baby?

MelissaMiso · July 2012

The only thing spoiled about my baby might just be the spoiled milk smell on her after she spits up post-comfort feeding Stick out tongue

Heather2256 · July 2012

ElinJ:
Exactly, would they rather hear my child SCREAM BLOODY MURDER? Because I don't want to hear that.

Yeah I get that enough while driving & unable to do anything!

littleredfish · July 2012

Just reading the post title made my eyes almost roll out of my head. My mom and MIL say this all the time! It's so frustrating. If I ask them for advice on what to do with some of her crying fits they also give me that line of "well sometimes they just need to cry, it's good for their lungs." Uh what? I see no logic there, should I be outside screaming right now to give my lungs a good work out? So I've decided it's probably best to get my advice here...more current (lol) .

babyruth88 · July 2012

Each situation is different but it is actually ok for them to cry a bit. My dr who also haskids to,d me i need to start working on ava he gave his advise after she screamed the whole time i gotmy pp exam. He asked why she hated the carseat i said she hates being put down he looked concerned and said thats not good you wont getto go anywhere. I took his baby steps advice and now ava finally tolerates being in carseat floortime etc. Its great. And she still cries but if she cries mor then a few minutes i know shes had enough. And now shes laughing more etc. So i will have to be sure to thank my dr for the advice

Brandyjean30 · July 2012

OOO...I got that one this weekend and people trying to wake her up from her naps because she "wasn't going to sleep at all at night if I let her sleep so much during the day"....I had to kindly remind them that at 7 weeks she still needed 16-18 hours of sleep a day.

People are crazy!

JEK76 · July 2012

I've discovered there is a big difference between my baby's SCREAMING voice and her fussy voice. For the first 9 weeks she just screamed, A LOT. Now we've turned a corner and sometimes she just fusses. I don't mind letting her fuss a little bit, she actually puts herself to sleep now for naps and night time after a minute or so of fussing, but when she screams I sure as heck pick her up.

People say such stupid things!

LadyTyler · July 2012

Brandyjean30:
OOO...I got that one this weekend and people trying to wake her up from her naps because she "wasn't going to sleep at all at night if I let her sleep so much during the day"....I had to kindly remind them that at 7 weeks she still needed 16-18 hours of sleep a day.
People are crazy!

I totally screwed up LO's nap schedule because EVERY mother I met kept telling me not to let him sleep during the day because that was why he wasn't sleeping well at night. Well, it turned out that even before I was waking him from his naps early he wasn't getting enough sleep so I was sleep depriving him even more! Poor guy had a whole month of not being allowed to sleep enough because I listened to all these crazy ladies that think newborns only need 10 hours of sleep each day. Grrr.

erb82 · July 2012

DH's grandmother tells me I'm spoiling DD2 (2 months old) from holding her too much when she cries, but MIL looks at me like I'm committing murder if I put DD1 (19 months old) down for a nap and I let her cry for a few minutes. I can't win, so I just try to ignore it.

davisas2323 · July 2012

You can't spoil a baby. Period. It doesn't even make sense for someone to say that. Sigh.

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