May 2012 Moms

Excited and so so scared!!

This Monday is our wedding anniversary and DH has plans for us on Sunday night. A good friend of ours who has a 4 year old daughter is going to come over and watch our LO. I am really excited to get out of the house alone with DH and do something where I can wear nice clothes and not a nursing bra with a receiving blanket tossed over my shoulder. However, I also want to vomit. I know it's so common for new moms to feel anxious over leaving their new babies but I am borderline wanting to ask him to change plans for something we can do as a family so she can come and I won't have to leave her :/ . I know she will be in good hands (like I said she has a daughter so she knows what she is doing when it comes to babies) so I am wondering if any moms out there have tips or words of encouragement to keep me from freaking out and ruining our one night out?

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Re: Excited and so so scared!!

  • We went out when we were visiting my family last weekend. It was great! I did worry about him while we were gone and even though we weren't going to talk baby stuff while we were out..we did :) It is hard to switch gears after weeks of totally focusing on the baby. It was still good though. We ended up coming home pretty early for a date night but it was a baby step. Next time we might stay out longer than two hours. :)
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  • This is really the easiest time to get away for a date night - get as many as you can!  Once they are a little older, they start getting entrenched in their routines and you won't want to mess with the routine.  Also, my son got really bad stranger anxiety at about 7 months (though not all kids do, obviously).  Of course, it gets better again at about 15 months, but there were a few months where Grandma was the only person we could leave our son with. 

    Enjoy it now!

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  • We went out for the first time last week and I swear I obsessed the whole time...I felt like a pit in my stomach, but I think it was partly because we left him with my aunt when honestly I am only really comfortable leaving him with our parents at this point.  A tip to make you feel better...ask your babysitter to have her phone on at all times and with her, and to answer your texts as promptly as possible.  Don't feel bad for checking in once or twice, it really might make you feel better.  I have left Owen with his dad for over an hour once, and the one time we left him with my aunt, and both times they didn't answer my texts and it drove me batty!  Just hearing the boring "He's doing great!  He took his bottle!" or whatever would make a big difference.  
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  • I had a hard time leaving her for the first time, but it made it easier that we weren't gone very long, and went to a restaurant two miles from home. We were probably gone an hour and a half. The second time it got a little easier and we stayed out 2.5 hours. I think I just needed to ease into it.


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  • Also, our 4 year anniversary is Thursday and we are going out on Monday night!  I am not that nervous this time though because we are leaving him with my parents, who for some reason, I feel so much better about leaving him with than anyone else.  Plus we are going to my favorite restaurant, The Melting Pot!  Woo hoo! (I'm sure I'll still miss him, but I'm determined to try to relax and have fun.)
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  • I still have  hard time leaving my girls. I never left DD1 overnight until she was 18 months!  If it is only a few hours try and just really enjoy yourself. It will be good for you!
  • DH & I went out when DD was only 2 weeks, I think. I almost told him we weren't going to. This was because my MIL was at the house & I was - & still am - not comfortable at all with her watching DD. But our roommates watched DD, who was originally suppose to watch her anyways. We were gone for 2 hours, got to go out to eat, drive around for a bit & rent a couple of movies. And I felt SO MUCH better when we got back & I found out DD was in the back of the house with our roommates the whole time. 

    .....then it back fired 2 weeks later when MIL chewed DH out for not letting her watch DD. But I still wouldn't have let her watch DD even knowing that - especially knowing that!

    But just have a good time & don't worry. :)

  • Don't cancel! In my opinion its important that you get out without little one. Take it slowly but do it! 

    I was forced to be away from lo for 2 whole day and nights last week. My oldest son spent 7 days in the hospital. When his condition got bad and he moved to ICU I felt like she should not be with us. Both sets of grandparents where at the beach. Its 1 1/2 hours away. I met them halfway and handed her off. I won't say it wasn't hard. It was!

    I guess the moral of the story is that you never know what life will throw your way. I am glad I had left LO more than a few times. I did help lessen the blow of having to be away from her for that long.  

    Oh and after 5 days home from the hospital, we are back for another week and had to spend 2 more days in ICU. This time I am going home every night to be with dd and dh is staying with our son. It's a childrens hospital and they are fine with ds2 and dd being her but we would rather they not be here for long amounts of time.  

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  • It's a little scary, but I think the sooner you take the plunge, the easier it is and the better for the long run for everyone.  My mom sent us out for a lunch alone one weekend she was in town, and it was odd.  I kept thinking I was forgetting something.  But it was also rejuvenating.  I wasn't worried because she was with Mom, who will be watching her starting in August.  

    Going back to work was hard too.  But what my friends told me was true - the anticipation of it was far worse than the reality.  Enjoy yourself.


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    We went to a "no kids allowed" wedding so we were forced to leave her.  MIL kept her for 4 hours and I was worried about her.  People had not seen us since we had her so they kept coming up to us asking about her and parenthood and I think that may have made it harder.  She goes for a half day of daycare next week to try it out and I think I may come home and cry.  :(  I dropped of her paperwork yesterday and teared up on the way home and didn't even leave her there.
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  • Enjoy yourself. The more you do it, the easier it will become. I am blessed to have my husband's grandmother staying with us for an extended period so now I can leave for a few hours with more ease. It was hard at first but it does get better.
  • You deserve a night out!!! Lo will be fine and if there is a problem your friend will call and you will come home. End of story.

    We went out last night and it was amazing to have "just us" time.

    Happy Anniversary!

  • Well tonight is the night! Thank you ladies for all of your words of encouragment. My friend is coming by at 5 even though we don't need to leave the house until 6 so I can take my time saying goodbye and not make us late (lol). DH and I compromised and he will take HIS phone so we can keep tabs on how things are going but so I won't be able to constantly check mine and be distracted. I think I have pumped enough milk to last her 3 nights (I wanted to be prepared!) and I am still nervous but feeling better. I think my nervous to excited ratio is starting to balance out. The anticipation is probably worse than how I will feel when we are actually out...right?? At least I hope so! :)
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