Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
terri_doula2010
member
Re: PSA: Don't use Dreft
I wouldn't personally use anything with perfumes/scents in it on a baby. You may have no problem doing it, but it just seems risky to me.
ETA: I also think babies smell amazing all on their own and would rather smell them than any fake fragrance from lotion or clothes...
This post makes me really happy.
And sad because my computer doesn't let me post that cute thumbs up icon.
I was researching detergents like crazy and was surprised that "baby detergent" was not very gentle or natural. We're using Tiny Bubbles now and it's been fine for all our clothes and cloth diapers.
I can't stand strongly-scented laundry stuff! I can't imagine using heavily perfumed anything on a baby--ick!
Just for fun--anyone have a detergent that they recommend? I just use whatever free and clear stuff is on sale
but if anyone has a rec, I'd love to hear it!
DH & I are both 28 Together: 12 years Married: 09/24/2011
BFP#1: January '12 - DD1 09/16/2012
Preterm labor 31 weeks. Monitored for Hellp and diagnosed with oligohydramnios July '12
BFP #2: 06/25 - EDD 03/05/15 MMC confirmed 8/1 - D&E 8/4 retained tissue discovered 8/20
BFP #3 11/24 - 12/15 Heartbeat detected - DD2 07/29/15
I don't get the perfumed baby detergent thing, either.
DH and I already use Tide Free & Gentle for everything, so that's what we're using for LO's clothes, blankets, and bedding.
partial molar pregnancy : bfp 6.28.10, d/c 8.17.10, 7 rounds methotrexate, cleared 7.1.11
alexander patrick : bfp 1.16.12, born 9.20.12 @ 39w1d, 7 lbs./11 oz./22 in.
scarlett irene elizabeth : bfp 5.24.13, born 2.3.14 @ 41w2d, 7 lbs./13 oz./19 in.
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
We used All F&C already, so that is what we continued using with DS.
We just started making our own detergent (yep. I'm that crunchy) which works well for all of us, but since the recipe I used calls for Fels Naptha which does have some perfumes in it, I'm going to buy a small container of F&C stuff to pre-wash all of DD's stuff. We washed DS's clothes seperately for the first few weeks or so, so we'll probably do that with DD as well with the F&C stuff and then see how she reacts to what we use.
Once I'm finished with the Fels Naptha detergent I have now, I plan to switch to plan liquid castile soap. It will be less work when making my detergent and no perfumes!
I also use free and clear (All at the moment, but usually whatever is on sale) detergent for all of our clothes. I actually find the smell of Dreft a bit nauseating-- I'd get overwhelming whiffs of it going through hand me down clothes and it took me a while to figure out what I was smelling (these clothes had been stored for 12+ months!).
I wasn't even aware it had a scent till you guys said something about it when I asked about washing the panels for my blanket. I have really sensitve skin and it would have been wonderful getting a rash every time I held my baby because i would be allergic to her clothes.
So glad you ladies told me though cause that is all everyone kees telling me to use.
I was going to start making my own as well...but we just started using a giant new one from Costco, so Itl be a while before we need more. I am all for saving money and being crafty, especially since we're going to try and make it wok for me to be a SAHM.
Me too
but I'm also too lazy to separate the kids clothes so LO's stuff is getting washed with DD and DS. 
Ohmigosh, thanks!
Word. Kirkland brand HE detergent here.
BFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11
BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12
We are currently using this recipe:
https://www.thefamilyhomestead.com/laundrysoap.htm
but next time we need to buy the soap portion, we'll buy liquid castile soap instead. TBH I haven't had any complaints out of the Fels Naptha one, though.
For CDs, I mix 1c Borax, 1c Washing Soda, and 1/2c Baby Oxy Clean. I used the powder dry, but added vinegar to the rinse as needed if they were smelling ammonia-y.