SS and his passive aggressiveness tactics

Valeriam · July 2012

Background- SS decided to join a gym and work out (he demands a ride everytime even though its 5 blocks away), and has decided he needs those protein shakes to help him out. First of all, he is not skinny- more on the husky side but he insists he needs these shakes that cost about 30 bucks for the mix. The mix has a ton of fat and cholesterol yet he insists he needs them.

The comedy I see in this is he goes about 3x/wk and follows a horrible diet. He eats like a bear and yet he thinks he needs the protein shakes. Mind you he eats mostly meat anyway- won't hardly touch a vegetable yet needs the protein shakes. So the other day him and my husbandwent to the gym and after are making the shakes right before dinner and I say "Aren't you guys going to eat dinner?"

Husband-"Yeah, but we need our protien."

Me- "I made fish.It has protein. There's two fillets for each"

Husband- "We need this."

So I roll my eyes and husband says "Why did you give that look"

Laughing I said "You guys barely burn the calories you eat and then you come home and drink those shakes with a ton of fat, sugar and cholesterol when you are going to eat a lean protein for dinner."

My SS got mad and has refused to eat dinner with us since Monday. Reprimand me if you will. I just think it counter productive for these husky guys to pound a protein shake before dinner. Especially when they are trying to lose weight and get lean. FYI- SS mom gets his shake. My husband has his own leaner shake mix he normally drinks for breakfast but this time was trying SS's.

Valeriam · July 2012

FYI- the problem I see in this is that we have rule that we all sit down and eat dinner together but after my dumb comment he just says he isn't hungry and goes to his room. He has been eating at the subway by his gym before we pick him up. (we go to different gyms since his mom signed him up before we did and his gym doesn't have babysitting for our other kids. He buys his sandwiches with the money his mom gives him.)

FutureMrsWittig · July 2012

Hopefully SS will take a nutrition or anatomy class and learn what those "healthy" shakes actually do to/for a body.

At least it's a Subway and not a McDonalds...

cmiller0623 · July 2012

true at least its subway.

is there a trainer or nutritionist person at the gym who could explain to him how the shakes work? maybe thats an idea for your H and SS so they can get the results theyre looking for. I know some people who have gotten the protein shakes then gained weight cause they got the ones for bodybuilders who burn serious calories several hours a day.

angelamaster1986 · July 2012

Sounds like boys will be boys.. Without DH's support on the family dinner or the redic. shakes you will be fighting a losing battle. Let it blow over and when he finds he hasnt lost any weight, he will lose interest.

karatechrissy · July 2012

It's 70% diet, 30% gym. You can't out exercise a shyyt diet. I agree he needs to speak w a trainer/nutritionist. He needs to cut his calories, eat clean (processed food needs to go. If there is an expiration on the label the worse it is for you) and cardio his little tush off. I also think after suggesting that, you just remove yourself from the situation. You will only get frustrated.

Valeriam · July 2012

Thanks all--- I will remove myself from the situation:)

karleegirl · July 2012

I think your biggest problem is your husbands attitude. You guys need to be a team.

SueBear · July 2012

I would not cook dinner for someone who chose not to eat with me "because they were angry." Make dinner for you and H, and let your SS eat his subway. Don't even offer to make a third helping unless SS apologizes or specifically asks you to include him. Just call your H to dinner and tell him it is his job to ask his son to join you at the table or not - - but you will not waste good food by cooking for someone who won't eat.

Jessicaanne_1@yahoo.com · July 2012

I'm just a lurker but it sounds to me like you have a lot of resentment toward your stepson. I feel bad for him.

lax15bsu · July 2012

Lol. My 18yo brother got those protein shakes to help him GAIN weight. He is 6'9'' and weighed barely 200lbs. Skinny as a rail. He added in the protein shakes to his weight training to help him build up muscle.

Puppylove*85 · July 2012

If your SS is husky and trying to lose weight, he probably feels self-conscious. Laughing at SS and DH and pointing out all the fat and sugar in the protein shakes does not seem like a way to help SS at all. His feelings were probably very hurt. He may have been embarassed to eat dinner in front of you after you judged his food choices.

You could have spoken to your DH in private about why you don't think that encouraging protein shakes for SS is healthy. Your posts come across as really judgemental of your SS and his food choices. What about trying to encourage healthy habits without tearing him down?

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