Community› The Bump Message Boards› Attachment Parenting
Attachment Parenting
New Discussion

AP as a single mom . . .

princesa2423princesa2423 member
in Attachment Parenting

So I'm pretty new to this board, I spend most of my time on the Single Parents board unfortunately .  . .

I rarely see info on how to AP as a single mom, and want to know if anyone has any advice/experience in this area? I am currently going through the divorce process, and DD's father wouldn't see her regularly for months because he refused to come see her at my residence. Now, a judge has ordered him to. Once she is a year, the judge may try giving her father supervised overnights. Because we co-sleep and DD is BF on demand, that would be extremely hard on her. Of course it would devastate me, but I'm much more concerned about her. How do I prepare her for that if it does end up happening?? As it is, her supervised visits cannot be supervised by me (though I'm allowed to be nearby and have to pop in to BF since she won't take a bottle), and sometimes may be by her aunt on her father's side, who she also really doesn't know. How do I prepare for her long periods of time with strangers? We're very attached and I'd hate her to be stressed in any way. Any help is welcome . . .thanks! 

Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
Report Reply to Post

Re: AP as a single mom . . .

  • tokenhosertokenhoser member

    I don't really think these are things you can prepare her for. I know it's not quite the same, but I was home with DS for a year and then came back to work so he had to start daycare. And he was not happy and we had a really rough couple of weeks... and then he got used to it. If these things happen, I would focus on making things predictable for her (send the same things with her, meet in the same place, hopefully her father would be open to following a bedtime routine) and trying to keep things civil between the adults.

    You can try to delay the overnights, but I would guess that's up to the judge and some will care about stressing the baby and some won't. And your ex may have interest and may not.

    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers
    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers
    Natural Birth Board FAQs
    Cloth Diaper Review Sheet

    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • tarahnpaultarahnpaul

    I would start getting together with your ex and whoever is going to be watching her (her aunt) on a regular basis now.  Wherever, your place, his place, a park, it doesn't really matter, the important thing is that she starts becoming very familiar with these people.  The better the relationship you have with her father, the more likely you would be able to work out an arrangement that is least stressful for her.  Unless there's been some sort of abuse, I would do whatever possible, even if I hated the guy, to get on his good side so that you had more of a say with regards to your daughter. 

    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"