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it's almost been a year

sept9107bridesept9107bride member
in Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
I've been feeling really down lately and I am not sure where to turn.   My miscarriage was at the end of January after we announced to everyone about the pregnancy at Christmas.  I've been dreading Christmas and today I thought maybe I should just stay home alone.  Since we found out about the pregnancy I've found out about 8 EIGHT (successful) pregancies around me.  3 out of my 4 co-workers.  A co-worker at a second job.  And 3 of my husband's cousins.  Last year I knew about 2 babies being born, I feel like this year they are stalking me! At church today I was really upset about the whole thing and cried to myself during much of the mass.  And at the end of the mass, the priest said that today we were doing a special prayer for all expecting mothers and asked them to stand.  He said a prayer and then everyone smiled and clapped at them while I made hand gestures of stabbing me in the heart to my husband.  We weren't ready for a baby last year.  It wasn't planned.  Yet I still feel so alone.  I hate being happy (which I truly am) for all the future mothers in my life right now.  I just needed to get this off my chest.  Maybe tomorrow will be a better day :(
Asher Thomas 5.19.10
Miles Edmund 12.29.11
Liam Robert 1.21.14
Baby 4...ok probably another boy here haha 9.20.15
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Re: it's almost been a year

  • MrsMSGMrsMSG member
    I am so sorry...I know I've been bombarded with twins -- even at church today, too! -- since our second loss last month.  So I get it, and it sucks.  I hope tomorrow is a better day for you, too.
    m/c feb 07 ~ m/c twins oct 08 ~ Duncan Thomas: born to heaven 5/19/09 - m/c jan 11

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  • beckastarbeckastar
    Oh, I'm so sorry you're having a rough time.  I almost walked RIGHT INTO a woman with an infant in a stroller at the mall today and I wanted to crawl in a hole and cry.  I hope you feel better soon.
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  • samm1983samm1983 member
    I'm sorry. ?It is so hard. ?I will have my second EDD this week and I am dreading that day.
    7 mm/c
    APS, hetero factor v leiden & MTHFR
    bfp #1 - 12.11.07, edd 8.14.08, mm/c 1.21.08 (10w4d)
    bfp #2 - 4.4.08, edd 12.3.08, mm/c 5.14.08 (11w)
    bfp #3 - 8.3.08, edd 4.15.09, mm/c 9.17.08 (10w)
    bfp #4 - 1.15.09, edd 9.26.09, mm/c 2.16.09 (8w2d)
    bfp #5 - 6.16.09, edd 2.25.10, mm/c 7.23.09 (9w)
    bfp #6 - 8.12.10, edd 4.27.11, mm/c 9.16.10 (8w1d)
    one more try -> bfp #7 - 2.11, our miracle baby boy arrived 10.11
    ttc again -> bfp #8 - 5.3.13, edd 1.13.14, mm/c 5.30.13 (7w3d)
    bfp #9 - 9.23.13, our miracle baby girl arrived 5.29.14

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  • MerryMarisaMerryMarisa
    Oh, I'm so sorry.  I hope you have a better day tomorrow.  ((( BIG HUGS )))
    TTC #1 w/ endo since Sept 2005. After many losses, a lap, tons of meds and tons of testing and, one failed IVF cycle, we were blown away with a surprise, sticky BFP...it's a girl!!! Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
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  • waitingforbaby#2waitingforbaby#2
    The Holidays will be hard, it seems a lot of us were planning on telling our families then (including myself) and we will probably always remember how we are feeling around this time also. That must've been so heartbreaking when the priest had the expectant mothers stand.... I'm so sorry you are sad today, tomorrow will be better.... (hugs)
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  • shellyrmmlshellyrmml

    I am so very sorry for your loss and that you are feeling so sad.  Many of us are in the same situation....I have two co-workers that are due within 2 weeks of my EDD and another one just announced her pregnancy.  Also, I have a birthday this week and my friends and family are probably going to throw me a big bash....you only turn 40 once, ya know....I would so prefer to still be pregnant for the big 4-0 birthday and just celebrate it the next year.  Now, I am going to have to put on the happy face for that day when I know it is going to be a hard day for me.

    I sincerely hope today is a better day for you....I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

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