boy or girl - wait for doc or pay?

OhioLady · July 2012

For those of you who don't want to stay team green, are you going to wait for your doctor's anatomy scan or pay to get it done earlier?

I just had my monthly appt, and I was broken hearted that my doc wants to wait 7 more weeks for my anatomy scan (even though I'll be in for a check up at 17/18 weeks).

I was just going to live with the wait till my friend randomly messaged me today, saying she had a coupon for a u/s office in town, and they could actually give me one this week (but I'm still going to wait just a little longer, I think). Only $65, and it's 'guaranteed' - they'll have you come back at no charge if they can't get a good view, and you get your money back if you find our they're wrong (which hopefully we would find that out at my doc's anatomy scan, and not in jan).

chelseakopperud · July 2012

I will only be having 1 ultrasound done and I would never pay for something that insurance will cover.

jobiann · July 2012

I'm waiting until my doctor does the u/s...I don't want to pay a clinic I don't have a relationship with.

amh04 · July 2012

To me its a waste of money, and we won't be paying for any nonmedical U/S. We will find out at our next appointment or at our A/S.

laurapacheco · July 2012

jobiann:
I'm waiting until my doctor does the u/s...I don't want to pay a clinic I don't have a relationship with.

This. As tempting as something like that sounds, I want to subject my LO to as few ultrasounds as possible. After my NT scan on Monday we don't plan to get any more until the anatomy scan at 18-20 weeks.

OhioLady · July 2012

right?! I'm usually such a penny pincher, and why on earth would I pay for something that I'm going to have to get done later anyway (and will be 'free', or a small co-pay).

But my anxiety/excited-ness is starting to get the best of me, and $65 sounds like a drop in the bucket...

decisions, decisions...

sesigs · July 2012

We are waiting for the anatomy scan with my doctor. I agree with PPs that I wouldn't want to go somewhere I don't have a relationship with.

OhioLady · July 2012

I think part my 'problem' is that I got myself all prepped for her to say that we would do the scan at my next appointment. So when that got shot down, I was just so disappointed.

Smiley-1980 · July 2012

My doctor does my A/S anytime after 16 weeks so I really only have to wait another month. I asked him if it's better to wait until 20 weeks and he said no because it's better to have the ultrasound earlier to find if anything is wrong so they can prepare or have further testing done as soon as possible.

I am hoping to pay for a 3D ultrasound later in my pregnancy though.

Marisajean01 · July 2012

I would not pay. I have already had several Ultra Sounds due to some bleeding and an ovarian cyst that they are keeping an eye on. I can't wait to find out!!!

ellaNu630 · July 2012

It's tempting, but I would wait. I'd rather spend that money in a fancy dinner : )

FreyaWin2382 · July 2012

OhioLady:
right?! I'm usually such a penny pincher, and why on earth would I pay for something that I'm going to have to get done later anyway (and will be 'free', or a small co-pay).
But my anxiety/excited-ness is starting to get the best of me, and $65 sounds like a drop in the bucket...
decisions, decisions...

Wait. You are having anxiety just because you want to find out the gender of your baby? Sorry, but using the phrase "heart broken" over being told that you have to wait another month to find out the gender??

luvindanimals · July 2012

Wait is my vote. When you do find out from the dr go out and put $65 you didn't spend on the ultrasound and buy some super cute clothes or something gender specific. Plus it helps to break up the pregnancy reaching those milestones. Don't rush ahead and take time to enjoy each stage!

ANBODIN · July 2012

We have a place called "Sneak-A-Peek", and they do elective ultrasounds with a few bells and whistles It is a personal choice as to whether or not you want to have elective ultrasounds done. I had one done at 11 wks, and I am so happy I did.

I could go back to that place to attempt to determine gender, but my OBGYN's office actually offers an elective ultrasound to determine gender at 16 wks. It does not count as the anatomy scan, which I will have at 20 weeks, and it is not claimed on insurance. They just charge $50, and an ultrasound tech at the office does it. I will be going in for that ultrasound in about 2 weeks

I am on pins and needles waiting to find out! Plus it is very popular in our area to go to "Sneak-A'Peek", so that is probably part of the reason why I feel less concerned about elective ultrasounds harming my baby.

OhioLady · July 2012

FreyaWin2382:
OhioLady:
right?! I'm usually such a penny pincher, and why on earth would I pay for something that I'm going to have to get done later anyway (and will be 'free', or a small co-pay).
But my anxiety/excited-ness is starting to get the best of me, and $65 sounds like a drop in the bucket...
decisions, decisions...
Wait. You are having anxiety just because you want to find out the gender of your baby? Sorry, but using the phrase "heart broken" over being told that you have to wait another month to find out the gender??

Why yes, I do have emotions over this kid. Thanks for pointing that out.

Wild_flower25 · July 2012

I will wait, I don't need to know any sooner. If I pay for an u/s, it will be a 3d one but those work best after 25 weeks.

FreyaWin2382 · July 2012

OhioLady:
FreyaWin2382:
OhioLady:
right?! I'm usually such a penny pincher, and why on earth would I pay for something that I'm going to have to get done later anyway (and will be 'free', or a small co-pay).
But my anxiety/excited-ness is starting to get the best of me, and $65 sounds like a drop in the bucket...
decisions, decisions...
Wait. You are having anxiety just because you want to find out the gender of your baby? Sorry, but using the phrase "heart broken" over being told that you have to wait another month to find out the gender??

Why yes, I do have emotions over this kid. Thanks for pointing that out.

I have no doubt that you have emotions about your child, my comment was directed as using the phrase heartbroken because you have to wait a little longer to find out the gender.

OhioLady · July 2012

Just after doing so much reading, every other book and website tells you anatomy scans are usually done 16-20 weeks, I just fully expected her to say that the scan would be done at the beginning of August. So yea, when I was told I have to wait 3 more weeks, I was really disappointed. I just love my doctor, and I know it's all on me for getting my hopes up, but I don't see how using the term 'heart-broken' as a synonym for disappointed isn't valid here.

Mama5181 · July 2012

Im in the minority here without a doubt, but we are doing a sneek a peek at 16 weeks at a pregnancy spa here in Cincinnati. This was a debate, but here is why we are going ahead,..... My DH is from Georgia, we live in Cincinnati. This is the first grandchild for both sides. We had to break the news that we were expecting via skype to his parents. This was a heartbreaker for DH who really wanted to be there to tell them in person. His parents will be visiting to help us move in 3 weeks. My OB doesnt do the A/S until 20 weeks. DH would like to be able to surprize his partents with the news of boy or girl in person while they are here. I was on the fence on just waiting till 20 weeks but he is so excited to tell them face to face that I am on board with paying the few extra $ to watch his eyes tear up when he tells them. I might get ripped apart by some bumpies for this one, but we are really looking forward to it. Big Smile

FreyaWin2382 · July 2012

OhioLady:
Just after doing so much reading, every other book and website tells you anatomy scans are usually done 16-20 weeks, I just fully expected her to say that the scan would be done at the beginning of August. So yea, when I was told I have to wait 3 more weeks, I was really disappointed. I just love my doctor, and I know it's all on me for getting my hopes up, but I don't see how using the term 'heart-broken' as a synonym for disappointed isn't valid here.

Listen, I will be the first to admit that I am pretty jaded on using the phrase "heart broken" because when I go into an ultrasound I break out into a cold sweat scared that there won't be a heartbeat (again) and I will being going through another loss. However, I understand that you are excited and want to find out the gender of your LO and can understand, especially if you were expecting one answer and got another, the disappointment. FWIW, I wouldn't go to an outside clinic for an ultrasound because I would be afraid that they would see (or not see) something and not be able to tell you anything there. I hope that you are able to reconcile this so you feel better about it.

bearkatjen · July 2012

I'm dying to know and my OB won't do the a/s at my 18 week appointment, and is having me wait till 20 weeks. As tough as it is to wait, I'll be waiting. I don't want to spend the extra money or have unnecessary u/s.

EmmyLou423 · July 2012

My doctor's office will do an elective ultrasound at 16 weeks for about $70. We will be having ours done next Friday. I guess I'm impatient. I haven't seen the baby since our 8 week dating ultrasound and I jumped at the chance to see him/her again.

Mason&Mama · July 2012

It sounds like you want to do it, so just do it. I don't think anyone here is going to change your mind. My personal opinion (since you did ask) is that paying for extra ultrasounds is ridiculous. I don't see how people can't wait a few weeks. And it isn't the money issue. I have $65 dollars. I just don't see the point of unnecessary medical interventions.

Allycat11 · July 2012

FreyaWin2382:
OhioLady:
right?! I'm usually such a penny pincher, and why on earth would I pay for something that I'm going to have to get done later anyway (and will be 'free', or a small co-pay).
But my anxiety/excited-ness is starting to get the best of me, and $65 sounds like a drop in the bucket...
decisions, decisions...
Wait. You are having anxiety just because you want to find out the gender of your baby? Sorry, but using the phrase "heart broken" over being told that you have to wait another month to find out the gender??

All of this. I was heart broken when my baby stopped developing, not a phrase I can ever imagine a person using about having to wait a few weeks to find out the sex of their child.

In answer to your question, I think it is a complete waste of money.

clariknittist · July 2012

I would personally wait for the dr. rather than spend the money. In my mind, even with insurance, you're already paying for it one way or another, whether in premiums or for some of us, co-pays/co-insurance. We just don't always feel that money leaving our pocket because in the case of premiums, it might've happened before we even got it in our paycheck. I'd rather wait until there's much less room for doubt - of course, DH and I are taking that idea so far we're waiting until birth, so maybe it doesn't feel so questionable to wait for me...!

OhioLady · July 2012

FreyaWin2382:
Listen, I will be the first to admit that I am pretty jaded on using the phrase "heart broken" because when I go into an ultrasound I break out into a cold sweat scared that there won't be a heartbeat (again) and I will being going through another loss. However, I understand that you are excited and want to find out the gender of your LO and can understand, especially if you were expecting one answer and got another, the disappointment. FWIW, I wouldn't go to an outside clinic for an ultrasound because I would be afraid that they would see (or not see) something and not be able to tell you anything there. I hope that you are able to reconcile this so you feel better about it.

I'm sorry that my loose use of the term offended you, really. I'm a PgAL too, but I rarely talk about it anymore, even on the boards (and this was a new s/n I made after a long break and the new LO). It's just how I've moved on. I don't pretend it didn't happen, but I also just continue my life just as I would have before... and I guess I do use the term heartbroken/disappointed loosely.

You bet your arse I could feel my body getting cold when the doc had some trouble finding the heartbeat with dopper yesterday, but day to day, I live about as optimistically as I can over this LO.

Noethola · July 2012

Totally a personal choice. I wont be going the elective route. But I agree with PPs. Earmark the money and spend it on something for the baby once you find out, or spend it on a nice celebratory dinner.

cindiesheart · July 2012

That sounds fun! I'd do it if I were you. I saw my doc yesterday and he said next visit (4 weeks from now) he should be able to tell what gender it is so you should be good in a couple weeks....

you should weigh your financial options though. Do you need to spend that money on needed baby items or do you have it to spare? Waiting is a very hard thing for most of us but if it will benefit you in the long run to wait it out then I'd suck it up and just wait.

alessarddavis · July 2012

I'm paying to find out, I won't find out until 20 weeks through my OB and I'm ready to know if I'm growing a boy or a girl

Additionally, the sneak-a-peak places here let you bring children and my OB doesn't and I really want my kids to be able to attend the ultrasound with us.

mrssmw · July 2012

I am getting one done at 16 weeks. DH is impatient and is leaving out of town for work and will be gone 1-2 months and he really wanted to be there and find out the sex before he leaves.

OhioLady · July 2012

alessarddavis:
I'm paying to find out, I won't find out until 20 weeks through my OB and I'm ready to know if I'm growing a boy or a girl Additionally, the sneak-a-peak places here let you bring children and my OB doesn't and I really want my kids to be able to attend the ultrasound with us.

I was looking at the local place's website and it's super family friendly- up to 18 people in the room - it's like getting a u/s done in a giant living room! If we do it, it would just be H and I, but I thought that was very cool for those that want to share the big reveal in that way with their family, especially kids.

alessarddavis · July 2012

That's how it is at the place I'm going to. Smile

You can have up to 30 people (who needs that many? lol) and if you don't actually want them in the room there is another room with a big screen where they can watch the u/s without being in the room with you. We're debating on how many we actually want there. I like having the option to have as many loved ones as I want present.

tsweet16 · July 2012

OhioLady:
FreyaWin2382:
OhioLady:

right?! I'm usually such a penny pincher, and why on earth would I pay for something that I'm going to have to get done later anyway (and will be 'free', or a small co-pay).

But my anxiety/excited-ness is starting to get the best of me, and $65 sounds like a drop in the bucket...

decisions, decisions...

Wait. You are having anxiety just because you want to find out the gender of your baby? Sorry, but using the phrase "heart broken" over being told that you have to wait another month to find out the gender??

Why yes, I do have emotions over this kid. Thanks for pointing that out.

DH is having a hard time coming to the realization that LO might be a girl (he's always dreamed of having a son). We looked into early u/s last night actually to see how much it would be to go in sooner than the anatomy scan so he can find out and have even longer to get adjusted to the news. It's stressful to me because I know that while he will love our child unconditionally once it comes out, the waiting is really hard for him. IF it was that cheap to get it done here, I totally would.

barbie92 · July 2012

I did an elective u/s when I was pregnant last time and I loved it! However, I am not doing it this time because we had to travel an hour and a half to get to the elective u/s place. We got to eat at Cheesecake Factory to celebrate while we were there

I won't be doing it this time because I am very high risk. But, if you want to do it, then go for it!

Starfish+77 · July 2012

I say why not? you would probably spend the $65 on a pair of shoes so if it's something that would make you happy, go for it

loreeann86 · July 2012

I'm going to pay for the ultasound at 16weeks..it's everyones personal choice what they want to do. I dont see any down side to it besides having to pay, but if that doesn't bother you then oh well.

Eags · July 2012

ANBODIN:
We have a place called "Sneak-A-Peek", and they do elective ultrasounds with a few bells and whistles It is a personal choice as to whether or not you want to have elective ultrasounds done. I had one done at 11 wks, and I am so happy I did.

I could go back to that place to attempt to determine gender, but my OBGYN's office actually offers an elective ultrasound to determine gender at 16 wks. It does not count as the anatomy scan, which I will have at 20 weeks, and it is not claimed on insurance. They just charge $50, and an ultrasound tech at the office does it. I will be going in for that ultrasound in about 2 weeks

I am on pins and needles waiting to find out! Plus it is very popular in our area to go to "Sneak-A'Peek", so that is probably part of the reason why I feel less concerned about elective ultrasounds harming my baby.

We have something like this in my city as well. I will be having at least 1 elective & probably another. U/s are completely safe- if I worked in a dr office like I did in college, I would have one done every week.

this decaf life · July 2012

I will find out at 20 weeks when my doctor does the a/s. I'm excited to find out but I'll wait for a little half way there excitement!

jnthurston · July 2012

Go ahead and do it OP! I am doing one at 16W to find out the gender at an imaging center that I went to when I was pregnant with my son. Its a huge living room and 15 people can go (even thought it will just be DH and I) - I dont care if I have to pay the $100.00... I want to see my baby and I want to know what we are having. Who cares what other people think, I'm all for it!