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May 2012 Moms
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DH vent a little long...

bornmommybornmommy member
in May 2012 Moms

Normally I would go over a friends and open a bottle of wine but DS makes it so I'm on here to b*tch.  Wine is open though!

 

So DH has been pretty unhappy at his job for a few months.  This is a repeat of a few years ago when he was at another place, doing pretty much the same job and he was unhappy.  He went over to this place because he was promised a quick promotion which never came through... So yet again, I am a sounding board for how bad his day was when he gets home.  Now, even though I have been dealing with this for years, I still don't really mind.  I want to support him and feel awful for him being in the position that he is in.  Truth is, he is pretty much stuck.  He is the breadwinner and we would not be able to afford living where we live without his pay check.  He doesnt have a college degree and pretty much has been doing the same job since he graduated high school so his resume doesn't have any spice.  Okay, that was me being good wife...

Now, I've been letting him know for years that I would support his decision to go back to school, to start a new career path, etc.  Today I got that dreaded call.  The "I can't do it anymore." call.  Now he has decided to start a business with his best friend.  He also decided to stay after work and have a "business meeting" with his best friend leaving me with dinner half made already and a baby who has been unhappy the majority of the day.  Now I had been telling him for years to gw out and do something because I knew one day, we would have a baby and really be stuck.  Well, that day is today and now he is willing to throw away financial security.  I'm so upset, pissed, bitter, frustrated... I really don't know what to do.   

 Just needed to get it off my chest I guess... Oh, and there goes Connor crying!  

              
                                   \

                                                            DS #1 born 05/25/2012   
                                                     BFP#2:  06/12/2013 ---- loss 
                                                            DS #2 born 4/08/2014
      BPF#4: 2/1/2016 --- 2/23/2016 suspected molar pregnancy--- 3/15/2016 D&E - diagnosis MM
                                                               BFP#5 - 9/22/2016
                    
                                                                                                                                 * formally bornmommy

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Re: DH vent a little long...

  • PotomacStPotomacSt member

    Yeah, I'd need a glass of wine after that too :( He definitely has the worst timing ever. Is there a way he can continue to work at his current job while starting the new business?

    Either way, I feel like quitting a job and starting a business is a decision that you two should make together. It's not right for him to unilaterally be making decisions that affect the whole family- especially when there is a new baby involved. Being married means that you are a team.

    Good luck.... keep us updated.

     

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  • winter-shockwinter-shock member

    They'd have to commit me if my DH did this!  

    I agree with PP is there anyway he can do the start up while still being at his current job? It might mean more work but maybe better off in the long run?! 

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  • stoneycakesstoneycakes member
    So sorry this is stressing you out.  Totally understandable!  On the bright side, maybe he will be happier in the long run, which translates to more happiness for the whole family. I'm not trying to downplay the stress of your situation, but sometimes I wish my DH would just up and leave his job.  Every day I look forward to him coming home and more often than not, it's like he's not even here because he's busy taking work calls or just needs to unwind alone because he's so stressed out. I look forward to the nights where he wants to sit down and *** about work to me, LOL.  I am so very thankful that he makes enough that I can SAH, but it comes at a cost.  Good luck to your DH.  I hope his new business venture is wildly successful and brings him happiness!
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