If LO is two or older and still bedshares

MrsSR · July 2012

Does anyone say anything negative about it?

Do you respond?

webMistress0609 · July 2012

I generally only mention it to people who wouldn't be disagreeable & only if it comes up. Ari spends the 1st part of the night in his own room, & that he usually comes down to our room as early as 11 or as late as 5:00. I taught him to use the potty & then come in quietly - don't wake anyone up.

If anyone were to say something negative, I would respond that it works for us & we all sleep well this way. I could really give a sh!t what others think about our parenting style.

00jennifer00 · July 2012

I agree with the pp. All of my kids have been in bed with us until 2-2 1/2yo. My 3 1/2yo still gets in bed most nights. He just needs it.

3003girl · July 2012

No one really asks and I don't tell people. DH actually sleeps with LO because she will want to nurse all night long if I sleep with her. We live in a loft though, so we are all in the same room. People come over and see the bed setup and don't say anything. I'm pretty set in my decisions though, so family and IL's know not to "challenge" me. (some people would say stubborn. lol) But really, LO is happy, independent and a wonderful child, so they have no room to advise, complain, whatever...

KateLouise · July 2012

webMistress0609:
I generally only mention it to people who wouldn't be disagreeable & only if it comes up. Ari spends the 1st part of the night in his own room, & that he usually comes down to our room as early as 11 or as late as 5:00. I taught him to use the potty & then come in quietly - don't wake anyone up.

This is pretty much us. She went through a phase of waking when DD2 would fuss, but now she sleeps through her sister waking. Often I don't wake when DD1 gets into our bed, and it's only because I wake to DD2 that I notice her.

I can see people biting their tongue from saying stuff. I can see them thinking, "that is absolutely insane, what is wrong with you." but no one has actually ever said that to me.

If they did though, I'd happily tell them that we're happy.

Normally thought if sleeping arrangements come up, I get in first and go on about how I love snuggling with my babies and how it's such a short time that I'll be able to wake to these beautiful little faces next to me, and chubby little hands around my neck. Who can argue with that?

Speak with confidence and people generally back off.

00jennifer00 · July 2012

YES! Oh my gosh, this is something I'm still working on, speaking with confidence about my Momma Bear stuff. If you say how amazing something is, people are going to look like heartless jerks saying that it's stupid or it spoils or whatever. Go on the positive offensive if the subject comes up.

Meg&Jesse · July 2012

DS still sleeps with us on Friday nights, "sleep with mommy and daddy night" and when we travel or he is sick. He currently has strep, so has been with us the past 3 nights.

Yes, people make negative comments. I would say most of the time I ignore the comments. I know we are not harming our son in any way and doing what works for our family. Like now, he is sick and has a very high fever. I feel so much better knowing he is next to us at night and we can keep an eye on him.

Oh..and DS just turned 4. DH and I also know we cannot just "cut off" the cosleeping night on Fridays when the baby is born. So we will figure it out when we get there. Either DH and DS can sleep in DS's room together or the baby can be in the bassinet and DS with us.

poison489 · July 2012

DS is almost 2.5 and still bed sharing with us. Can't say anyone has said anything negative to me about it. Even if they did, I wouldn't take it to heart. It works for us and that is all that matters.

SchroederMommy2Two · July 2012

My son recently just turned two, and at his birthday party of all places my MIL was complaining about our "Mega-bed" as I call it, we just pushed two beds together and we all snuggle, and we're planning on adding my daughter to the snuggle-fest this fall. I just tell her "well I am not asking you to bed share with him every night he's our child, it's our business". She's really the only one we've had a consistent issue with. I've had a couple strangers give the stink eye when I say we bed share, but I just let it slip.

anonsouthernbell · July 2012

My son does...my mom will say stuff, but I usually either smile and nod or just tell her it works for our family and then change the subject...

skyejo · July 2012

DD is 21 months and we bedshare part time. She starts off in her room and then when she wakes and cries we bring her to bed with us.

I've heard negative comments about bedsharing since the beginning. But it's our family and what works best for us so I really don't worry about what other people think about it. When I get comments about it I say that it we all sleep better this way and I'm not about to change a good thing.

JenninMA · July 2012

I just don't talk about it with anyone who I think will give me grief about it. DS will be 3 next month and I'm moving toward having him sleep independantly, but he really just isn't ready so I'm not going to force him into it. I have a lot of confidence in our decisions about this so nothing anyone would say would sway me.

KayaXavier · July 2012

Nope. My 3 year old bed shares all night though she does have her own room and bed, she has never spent a whole night there. We tried to transition her and she wasn't ready and we like having her in here anyway. The only comments I've heard have been about where we are all going to sleep when baby #2 gets here in a couple weeks. I just plan to feel it out, we'll see. We have a guest bedroom if we need to have my husband and daughter co-sleep in one room and baby and I semi-cosleep (bedside hammock) so that not everyone is up every 2 hours for feedings, we can. We'll see. I'm not overly concerned about if people find my AP crazy.

sevans1975 · July 2012

Nobody really asks about it and if they did I would tell them that we all get better sleep bedsharing and we will change arrangements when/if we feel it necessary.

But, like I said...no one really asks me. None of their business.

InfinityDreamer · July 2012

DS was in bed with us every night till 3.5. He started going down in his own room after that but coming in a lot at night. He had to stop sharing our bed when DD was born (he was almost 4) because there just wasn't room for four people in a full/double bed. Now that we have a bigger bed he still comes in occasionally, and DD crawls in bed with us early every morning. When the kids don't come in the bed feels huge, like DH and I are sleeping miles away from each other on our own pillow islands.

People have asked why we don't have a crib for the baby and we explain that it's silly to have since none of the kids never slept in them anyway. When they look shocked and ask where baby will be sleeping I just say, "Well, gated in the kitchen with the dogs, of course!"

Want a personalized experience?

If LO is two or older and still bedshares

Re: If LO is two or older and still bedshares

Choose Another Board

Search Boards