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What's the appropriate reaction to this?

twinkl5379twinkl5379 member
in Blended Families

We just moved into a new house, brand new construction less than 1 month ago. The s-kids have been over maybe all of 5 times. Just after they left last week I noticed that the 9 year old has a small hole in his wall already. This was most likely the result of them fighting which is constant (8 and 9 year old boys).

They did not show us when this happened; I discovered it after they left. H has not addressed it with them b/c they've not been back since. I have no idea on how to address it with them b/c I'm not very involved in the parenting since I'm not the parent. But I'd like to help H with thoughts or suggestions b/c he doesn't know the best route either. 

I think they should've told us for one, but I think instead they were trying to hide it.  Advice?

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Re: What's the appropriate reaction to this?

  • AmberMH08AmberMH08
    get the stuff to fix it and make them help patch it and sand it and repaint it. that will teach them something and get the wall fixed but they should also be on some sort of restriction from TV or favorite activity. 
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  • KaeldrasmommyKaeldrasmommy member
    imageAmberMH08:
    get the stuff to fix it and make them help patch it and sand it and repaint it. that will teach them something and get the wall fixed but they should also be on some sort of restriction from TV or favorite activity. 
    I quite like this idea. You fix what you damage and then a priveledge loss for not being up front and honest.
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  • Jessys_GirlJessys_Girl

    imageKaeldrasmommy:
    imageAmberMH08:
    get the stuff to fix it and make them help patch it and sand it and repaint it. that will teach them something and get the wall fixed but they should also be on some sort of restriction from TV or favorite activity. 
    I quite like this idea. You fix what you damage and then a priveledge loss for not being up front and honest.

    Yep, this is how I'd handle it.  And I'd make it clear "Fixing the wall is your punishment for damaging it.  Losing video games for 2 days is your punishment for not being honest and telling us what happened."

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  • twinkl5379twinkl5379 member
    I like this idea too. Thanks!
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  • SaranSaran member
    And make em do some chores around the house to earn the money to get the hole fixed!
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  • scoobyd266scoobyd266
    imageJessys_Girl:

    imageKaeldrasmommy:
    imageAmberMH08:
    get the stuff to fix it and make them help patch it and sand it and repaint it. that will teach them something and get the wall fixed but they should also be on some sort of restriction from TV or favorite activity. 
    I quite like this idea. You fix what you damage and then a priveledge loss for not being up front and honest.

    Yep, this is how I'd handle it.  And I'd make it clear "Fixing the wall is your punishment for damaging it.  Losing video games for 2 days is your punishment for not being honest and telling us what happened."

    I agree, 100%! Great idea!

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  • twinkl5379twinkl5379 member

    imageSaran:
    And make em do some chores around the house to earn the money to get the hole fixed!

    That is great, but I"d really be pushing it then! H has never really made the kids clean up their room/mess before they leave, and it really bugs me.

    He's finally agreed to making them clean up their rooms before they leave though. The last time they left it was such an issue for him. He got constant pushback from them; he had to get tough and apparently walk them through it. He was very frustrated.

    I really hope he sticks with this. They have to learn responsibility and how to take care of things. I keep a fairly clean house and think they should do the same while they're there.

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