LGBT Parenting

Almost 3 and Quirky as can be!

Hi Ladies. It's been a while since I've checked in (I used to me "mindingpandq") but hope to be back for a while and I bring a question! My almost 3 year old (she'll be 3 in October) is struggling a lot with clothing. She has had some other quirks that have me a touch worried as well and wanted to check what you categorize as "normal". So... she is particular about clothes, only wanting to wear soft dresses. Everything that she doesn't like is "too tight". If we get whatever said item is on her, she's fine and doesn't seem to have trouble tolerating it, but there is usually a resultant tantrum. She's never been particularly affectionate, but will let us hold her and lvoe on her, BUT when she hurts herself, she often appears overwhelmed and shies away... almost acts embarrassed and tries not to cry. Those are her 2 different things... otherwise she's great - funny, very social, too verbal! Look forward to your thoughts/experiences. THX!
Iui #1 = unmedicated = bfn. Iui # 2 = clomid 50 mg = bfn. Iui # 3 = clomid 50 mg = bfn. Iui # 4 = unmedicated = bfn. Iui # 5 = unmedicated = bfp - miscarriage at 5 wks. Iui #6 = nov 2012 = gonal f 75, endotrim 100= chemical pregnancy/bfn

Re: Almost 3 and Quirky as can be!

  • She may have a sensory thing (the clothing and injury triggers are what make me think that), or she may just be a quirky kid.  If it isnt impacting her ability to function day to day, build relationships with others, or perform in daycare/preschool (if she attends either), then I wouldnt worry about it at this point. (though if you've got that nagging mom-instinct thing going on, it may be worth exploring...i give a lot of credit to a mom's gut feeling).

    We aren't all meant to be cookie-cutter and quirkiness makes life interesting :)

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  • One of my kids is like that and REFUSES to wear any shirt with buttons. He's had this preference since about 2.5y and we follow his lead with it (with the rare need to wear a dress shirt when needed and then there is a lot of whining/complaining/negotiating.) And if given the chance, the kid would live in his "cozy pajammies" every day/all day. Like CT said, it hasn't impacted his day to day life and he doesn't seem to have sensory issues in any other area. So we roll with it.
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  • Like CTBride said, follow your instinct. I would just bring it up with her pediatrician. It is most likely nothing, but sometimes being super sensitive to touch can be warning signs for some neuro stuff. I wouldn't worry about it, but it is always good to over share with the pediatrician!
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  • The clothing issues sound pretty much like a normal picky 2/3 year old to me.  I've known lots of kids that will only wear soft pants, and both of my nephews (3) hate jeans because they're not soft enough. 

    As far as the affection, when you take your whole description of her into account (the fact that she is otherwise social, verbal, etc.) it also sounds pretty normal, but the fact that you're concerned could possibly indicate the mommy intuition CT mentioned.  I'd just bring it up at your next pediatrician appointment and see what they say!

    I don't remember how close to 3 she is, but if you have a few months left another option would be to get an early intervention evaluation.  In most places they're free for kids under 3 and there's really no harm in having one done even if chances are she wouldn't qualify for anything.  (Services change a lot at 3, so it's a whole different thing for both testing and treatment at that point.)  

    TTC with PCOS since July 2011.
    IVF Oct/Nov 2012
    Beta #1 = 77, Beta #2 = 190, Beta #3 = 1044
    Cautiously optimistic.
  • imageKershnic:

    The clothing issues sound pretty much like a normal picky 2/3 year old to me.  I've known lots of kids that will only wear soft pants, and both of my nephews (3) hate jeans because they're not soft enough.

     

    Oh, yea...I forgot about jeans. Carter hasn't had on a pair of jeans in about 4y. He hates them.

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  • ha - sorry to laugh but I am 36 years old and I am "Normal" or so I think... But i have tactile issues and sensory issues...

    I cant stand pants that touch my legs or butt so I have to wear a bigger size bigger so That i dont feel constricted ... I have to sleep with a certain sheet that feels a certain way ( apparently I am the only one who can feel this diff) but just random things... I will not share dairy products with people or family my wife or my kids... 

    so it may be just a quirk ...  i dont really like custard stuff or certain food because of the way they feel....

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  • This made me laugh! My wife is the same way... no wonder that she birthed our daughter. I have pretty much sent her on a tale spin even considering that something may be up, but when anyone suggested testing I kinda withdrew from teh idea. I am a psychologist and have worked primarily with children and families for the last 15 years which makes me a little more "on it" than I think is necessary. I SUPER appreciate all the feedback and normalizing... I think that my daughter just has her things and the better we can do at accepting her in totality instead of analyzing her differences, the better we will all be. Last night when I came home from work she was wearing the MOST UNCOMFORTABLE, ITCHY, POLYESTER snow white costume. I think if she really had sensory issues that would not be happening. The night before she had on a princess dress inside out - on the inside near her skin lace, gaudy buttons. Yes our daughter is a princess.... sometimes its just inborn :) THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU ALL for your feedback!
    Iui #1 = unmedicated = bfn. Iui # 2 = clomid 50 mg = bfn. Iui # 3 = clomid 50 mg = bfn. Iui # 4 = unmedicated = bfn. Iui # 5 = unmedicated = bfp - miscarriage at 5 wks. Iui #6 = nov 2012 = gonal f 75, endotrim 100= chemical pregnancy/bfn
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