Dealing with comments about limiting visitors (Question/Vent)

JessieCupcake · July 2012

We have a neighbor who is also friends with my ILs. She keeps making comments to my ILs about how she and her children want to see my LO. Then my ILs tell me about it.

I've been following what the pedi says and limiting my baby's visitors until he is 6 weeks old. My family has been very considerate and understanding. My LO is a month old so it's only 2 more weeks to go.

I saw the neighbor in passing and she made a comment that bothered me. She said "So, what in 2 weeks he'll be magically immune to everything?"

I didn't really know what to say to that. I can't even remember what I did say..

Maybe I'm just sensitive because I've had a lot of sickness in my family and I thank God every day that my LO is healthy. But this comment really bothered me. The tone of what she said wasn't in a joking way either.

What would you say to comments like these? Has anyone else had to deal with similar comments?

giggles0918 · July 2012

I would tell her that your pedi said to limit visitors until 6 weeks until she has built up her immune system a little more. Try to ignore their comments - I know easier said then done.

anonsouthernbell · July 2012

That would annoy me too!

AnariaR · July 2012

My husband's response to hearing about this was that he'd tell her 'No, it'll be another month after that before LO is immune to you.'

I think it's very weird that people feel like they have a 'right' to see your baby, even some family members.

Gismo123 · July 2012

That is a very rude thing for your neighbore to say. My response would have been something like "I'm sorry you don't care about our child's health but we do". I have actually lost a 15 year friendship because a so called friend didn't like the fact that I didn't want anyone holding DS unless they had their tdap shot or they could wait until he got his 2 month old shots. She's anti vaccines and tried to tell me I was in the wrong.....my kid my decision! People are just so damn rude sometimes.

piedpiper07 · July 2012

My MIL had a baby years ago after DH and was told the same thing. She took the LO visiting anyway and she contracted a virus that made her sick and she passed away. She was telling me this basically to say to not give in to pressure to visit... People can be so pushy!!

Samiantha101 · July 2012

As the parent, it's absolutely your decision about visitors. With that said, I think your neighbor probably said what everybody else was thinking.

JessieCupcake · July 2012

piedpiper07:
My MIL had a baby years ago after DH and was told the same thing. She took the LO visiting anyway and she contracted a virus that made her sick and she passed away. She was telling me this basically to say to not give in to pressure to visit... People can be so pushy!!

How terrible. It's so scary how things like this can happen.

Sawyerplus1 · July 2012

Samiantha101:
As the parent, it's absolutely your decision about visitors. With that said, I think your neighbor probably said what everybody else was thinking.

I agree with this. You can do what you want with your own baby, and her comment was totally unnecessary, but the 6 week rule doesn't really make sense to me either.

JessieCupcake · July 2012

Sawyerplus1:
Samiantha101:
As the parent, it's absolutely your decision about visitors. With that said, I think your neighbor probably said what everybody else was thinking.
I agree with this. You can do what you want with your own baby, and her comment was totally unnecessary, but the 6 week rule doesn't really make sense to me either.

My pedi told me that if my LO develops a fever before 6 weeks, he is automatically hospitalized. I just assumed that's where they got the number of weeks from but I could be wrong..

kincaid44 · July 2012

giggles0918:
I would tell her that your pedi said to limit visitors until 6 weeks until she has built up her immune system a little more. Try to ignore their comments - I know easier said then done.

This. And how rude of her! That would bother me too as I tend to be a little overly sensitive, but you have to do what's best for your little one!

amberlynnr7 · July 2012

for someone who wants to meet your baby - she is not making very nice comments that would allow for that. it really doesn't matter why...it is your baby, your decisions. I would just ignore it. people say & do stupid things. we will be putting up with things like this for the next 18+ years.

snicksnack · July 2012

As my MIL says, she works in a hospital, it has nothing to do with how immune they are and everything to do with how their little bodies will handle being sick. Most hospitals require a spinal tap for a baby under 4 weeks of age with a fever of 100.4. My pedi said to avoid exposure for the first two months. She did say I can take him out since it is summer because not as much is going around but to avoid children, and large crowds. With DD we were told to not take her anywhere other than docs. and maybe grandparents house if it is not for a party for the first 6 weeks because she was born during h1n1 scare.

JessieCupcake · July 2012

snicksnack:
As my MIL says, she works in a hospital, it has nothing to do with how immune they are and everything to do with how their little bodies will handle being sick. Most hospitals require a spinal tap for a baby under 4 weeks of age with a fever of 100.4. My pedi said to avoid exposure for the first two months. She did say I can take him out since it is summer because not as much is going around but to avoid children, and large crowds. With DD we were told to not take her anywhere other than docs. and maybe grandparents house if it is not for a party for the first 6 weeks because she was born during h1n1 scare.

Thank you for the information. I didn't know about the spinal tap. How terrible for a LO to go through that.

My pedi told me I could take LO outside in the yard which I have been doing. I think the fresh air is good for him. Plus getting out of the apartment is good for me too.

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