Pregnant after 35

Chivalry is dead I tell you!

Ladies I have to tell you that I am entirely disappointed in the human race... Most specifically men. I am so glad that I am married to a man who still holds doors open for both men and women, will give up a seat for a person less able and has manners. But let me tell you.... He is a dying breed!

 Yesterday I went to my MFM appt and the office is pretty small with about 12 seats in the waiting room. There was no AC working and hot as h*ll and at 36weeks pregnant I am sure that I was sweating like a pig. I went in for blood pressure weight etc and then back to the waiting room where there were no seats. I waited and waited thinking one of the 5 men would give me their seat or make their very able bodied 10yr old boy get up but no! 20 minutes I stood up for in a hot crowded room ..... Is chivalry dead?  At one point another lady stood up and offered me her seat as she was only 12 weeks so she said and hoped someone would do it for her when she gets to third tri. I thanked her but declined saying that there were others in the room that were in a much better position to stand than either of us hoping one of the men would get the hint...., nope! 

What is wrong with people!  Sure I could have said something but I thought if I opened my mouth I might cause a scene as I do have a bit of a potty mouth :-)

 

Vent over.... But ladies I beg of you please teach your boys that chivalry is not dead....  

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Re: Chivalry is dead I tell you!

  • People are always amazed that my 16yo says please and thank you, and addresses everyone as sir or ma'am. She holds the door open for people, offers seats, etc. Its called manners. We should be shocked they're gone, not shOcked when we see them. On a side note, mothers should teach this to their daughters, too. 
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  • People amaze me!  

    I was indulging my craving of an icee at the mall last week (from burger king). The line was fairly long, and people constantly were walking in between the people in line. Not a single person said pardon me or excuse me in the 10 minutes I was there!  I was shocked! 

    However, today at a gas station, a guy held the door for me- even though I was at least 10 ft away when he walked through the door. And I was definitely looking grubby after taking a long walk & working in the yard! 

    TTC since Feb 2012. Me: 39, DH: 37
    BFP #1 5/27/12- m/c 7/9/12 @ 10w2d (cytotec induced @11w).
    Fibroids, Hashimoto's Hypothyroidism
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  • I am married to a man who would give up his seat to someone in need! I can never understand why this is such a difficult concept. I wonder if it even crosses their mind!? I don't think it's dead but I think it's getting less.

    I agree that it should be the norm so why are we surprised when it actually happens...sad

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  • My husband also is very chivalrous - he was raised that way (and even went to cotillion).  We are raising our children to be the same way - and it starts very young and also modeling the behavior you want.  We insist our 2.5 year old say please and thank you - and now she says it without being prompted a lot of the time.  Nothing annoys me more than a rude child.  I think by teaching basic manners instills a compassion for others that makes them a better person overall.
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  • If it's not dead, it does seem to be dying.

    My DH and oldest DS both shut my car door as I'm getting in the car, all the kids will hold a door for someone, they are expected to say "yes ma'am" and "yes sir" and address adults by their last names if they are not close to us and as "Mr. Tim" or "Mrs. Jenny" etc if they are family friends (although, we get hassled by a number of people for being too formal) and my kids, husband and I all give up chairs to an older person, woman - especially if pregnant or distressed looking. My 21mo DS already says "cuse me" when he wants past someone. I agree with pp - it's both training and modeling - and not done nearly enough.

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  • That is SO irritating. Depending on how obnoxious(and able bodied) I feel I'd be a snot and actually sit on the ground(if it's clean) to see if anyone gets the point, and I'm not past making a spectacle of getting up slowly and awkwardly as I mention to the waiting nurse that's just called my name that I had to sit on the ground because all the seats were taken by the "clearly tired and sick people,(said loudly)"...yep, that's how obnoxious I get when I'm pregnant...my DH better worry, lol.
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  • I just experienced this on the parking lot shuttle last week.  I was about 19 weeks and clearly pregnant.  I'm the last one on the shuttle and the only one standing - everyone else got a seat, including the man that got on in front of me who took the last one.  The shuttle ride is bumpy and there is only an overhead bar to hold onto for the ride.  I almost fell a few times and would have landed on my baby belly but not one person gave me their seat - not even for a 5 minute ride.  I wouldn't have minded for that short of a ride if I wasn't afraid I'd fall of course but honestly, it was dangerous.  

    My 2 year old nephew says excuse me, welcome, tanks, etc.  And even says excuse me when he's trying to cut in line at the amusement park.  HA!  It's a polite cut but he stills says it.  We nipped that in the butt quick though.  My boyfriend's 8 year old daughter NEVER says thank you unless her dad tells her too.  Kids need to be taught and reminded so they pick up the habit.  Drives me crazy.   

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  • reb562reb562 member

    I'm very bold, so I would have asked one of the men to give up thier seat for me.  When  you put people in a spot like that, they seem to react per se.  Obviously sometimes-- not all the time in a good way...LOL

    That was terrible of them...ouch! 

     

     

     

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  • My H and I were just talking about this subject over the weekend. He was rasied in the south and his grandfather was his "father figure" so he got an old school education in how to treat people. He has always opened my car door and doesn't even like it if I get to a door first and open it. We are having a girl and DH was saying how he will teach her to want nothing to do with boys who don't have manners and won't open her car door, etc. I was giggling that she might be single for a while waiting for a polite fella, but then I realized hey, I didn't get married until last year, at 38 years old. I'm glad to see that some of you are still teaching your boys manners, there's hope for our daughter ;) She won't be exempt from having good manners either! Like all of the people who walk into a store in front of you and drop the door on you...so rude.
    Married August 14, 2011 Gave birth to our beautiful baby girl on September 17, 2012
  • imageNuggetJo:

    Ladies I have to tell you that I am entirely disappointed in the human race... Most specifically men. I am so glad that I am married to a man who still holds doors open for both men and women, will give up a seat for a person less able and has manners. But let me tell you.... He is a dying breed!

     Yesterday I went to my MFM appt and the office is pretty small with about 12 seats in the waiting room. There was no AC working and hot as h*ll and at 36weeks pregnant I am sure that I was sweating like a pig. I went in for blood pressure weight etc and then back to the waiting room where there were no seats. I waited and waited thinking one of the 5 men would give me their seat or make their very able bodied 10yr old boy get up but no! 20 minutes I stood up for in a hot crowded room ..... Is chivalry dead?  At one point another lady stood up and offered me her seat as she was only 12 weeks so she said and hoped someone would do it for her when she gets to third tri. I thanked her but declined saying that there were others in the room that were in a much better position to stand than either of us hoping one of the men would get the hint...., nope! 

    What is wrong with people!  Sure I could have said something but I thought if I opened my mouth I might cause a scene as I do have a bit of a potty mouth :-)

     

    Vent over.... But ladies I beg of you please teach your boys that chivalry is not dead....  

    You are a better woman than i because my pregnant ass would have said something or i would ask the front office person in a VERY loud voice if there was a chair they could get for me.  

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