4-month-old sleep debacles
bluejayway
member
Up until recently, DD would fall asleep breastfeeding at night. We'd bathe her, read stories (mostly for our older DD), then I'd sit in the rocker in the dark and feed her. I'd unlatch her when she was asleep, then lay her down, and she'd stay asleep (took maybe 20-30 mins). She was sleeping like 5 hours solid, then waking to feed for 10 minutes or so, then back down for another 3 or 4 hours. It was fantastic.
Now, all of the sudden, she will not stay asleep when laid down. It's taking me like three hours and 10 tries. I just keep having to put her back on the breast/rock her, etc.
I know a lot of people would say to put her down awake anyway. But, she gets so mad, like progressively fusses until it's an all out scream fest. I am not into CIO, I don't mind feeding her to sleep, rocking, etc (we rocked our older DD to sleep until she was 19 months, and I BF'd her to sleep until she was 16 months--but she would generally stay asleep when laid down!). DD2 sleeps in our room, but in her crib. She is even worse at nap time. Will not sleep in the crib at all. I literally tried for six hours one day and EVERY time I laid her down in there, she freaked. (I guess she felt rested enough having slept on me in 10-minute bursts, haha). I know some of it is her being four months and more aware and interested in things--she isn't eating as much during the day, likely, and is making up for it at night.
What would you do? Any tips? I am getting to the point of emotional exhaustion. She's also never taken a bottle, so I am always the one doing this. I don't want to make bad habits. I won't do CIO. I can't really co-sleep, as my boobs are too big and unwieldy to do side-lying breastfeeding. Should I just chalk this up to being a phase and keep at what I am doing?
Re: 4-month-old sleep debacles
I think there is a "four month wakeful" period or growth spurt. It's probably just a phase. You've been very lucky so far!
My 18 mo old doesn't sleep 5 hours straight!
Our 4 mo wakeful lasted a good 2 1/2 weeks. It was just awful. The emotional exhaustion you mentioned is just as bad as the physical. Do you have a swing? My LO has never slept in her crib. She has to have constant motion. When she hit 4 months she stopped napping in her swing completely and will only nap in the Ergo on me.
If it's taking so long to her down at night, consider moving bedtime back. I noticed that I was doing the same thing, fighting her for an hour or whatever before she finally fell asleep. Now I just start the whole rigmarole at a later time and it's working better.
I also worry about bad habits, CIO, etc. especially since I don't want my LO to take every nap in the Ergo with me forever. But I realized that if I spend too much time worrying about "forever" that it stresses out my "now" even more. KWIM?
This was my experience: DD used to sleep long stretches in a cosleeper. Around 3-4 months, she stopped. She would not sleep in there w/o screaming and screaming. She wouldn't nap unless I was holding her. I got super frustrated with it and decided I was going to stop trying to force anything on her and just do what she wanted. That was to sleep with me. It wasn't a phase, it was a new reality. When I stopped expecting it to change, it got much easier to deal with. She still wakes every 2-3 hours to eat at 1 year.
I could have written this! My son started doing that right at 4 months..he's almost 5 months and it's STILL happening!! For 4 months I nursed him to sleep, put him to bed, and did t hear from him for 7 hours. Now, if he doesn't cry being put down, he cries like 10 minutes later! He's like your LO - a tension increaser. Leaving him to cry turns in to hell on Earth. He gets him self so worked up he's got tears streaming down his face, snot everywhere, scratches on his face, and choking within 5 minutes,... CIO is not an option.
I guess I have no advice, just want you to know you are not alone!
Thanks, good to know iI'm not alone at least! I haven't tried belly sleeping, as she hates being on her tummy in general. But maybe worth a shot. We have been on vacation this week, and I've had some luck using this glider rocker my in laws have. I think my recliner rocker I've been using at home is just too disruptive and loud when I stand up.
I also may try moving her to her own room. It would be darker and quieter. I prefer her next to me, but it may be time.