crying poll

glenrapids · July 2012

i didn't realize that people respond so differently to crying babies. i've learned that i'm on the more attachment parenting side of things when it comes to crying. my DH and his familiy, on the other hand, are very much in the "let babies cry" camp. what's yours?
[Poll]

CountingUp · July 2012

If she's crying there's something wrong and one of us is usually there to help. If she's fussing but not actually crying we give her time to sort it out on her own.

kwinkle1980 · July 2012

If I didn't let A cry sometimes, he would never get to practice crawling, which is what he desperately wants to do. He cries the whole time, though. I feel this is just something he needs to do and it would not do any good to stop him.

emilyerin13 · July 2012

This mama's heart has a hard time with crying. Both my kids were/are "high needs" with DD being colicky and reflux and now DS just has reflux. I do try to let him fuss it out if I know that he's fine but sometimes it's just too hard on me.

KeyLime81 · July 2012

I think there are different kinds of crying. If I hear his "distress" cry, I rush in right away. If it's simply an "I'm tired/frustrated and this is my way of dealing with it" cry, then I let him fuss a bit. If that cry starts escalating, then I step in.

Ricola · July 2012

KeyLime81:
I think there are different kinds of crying. If I hear his "distress" cry, I rush in right away. If it's simply an "I'm tired/frustrated and this is my way of dealing with it" cry, then I let him fuss a bit. If that cry starts escalating, then I step in.

This is exactly how I handle it, too. :-)

InTheSun · July 2012

KeyLime81:
I think there are different kinds of crying. If I hear his "distress" cry, I rush in right away. If it's simply an "I'm tired/frustrated and this is my way of dealing with it" cry, then I let him fuss a bit. If that cry starts escalating, then I step in.

This. If it's like "You put me in my pack n' play and that's not where I wanna be, b!tch!" Then I give him a few minutes to see if he'll get over it. If it's "I just smacked my head on the tile floor because I launched myself off of my play mat," then I rush to him. Then there's the classic, "You put me in my crib because I'm tired, I'm more tired than you thought so now I have to cry about it" cry and that warrants 10 minutes of ignoring followed by some pacifier therapy and patting.

bunniekrissy · July 2012

I tend to him when he cries asap. A bit of fussing is ok, but depends on circumstances. Sometimes I have to let him cry while I go to the bathroom, clean up a mess, start a load of diapers, etc. and I try not to let it bother me. Generally AP philosophy here.

Greenbaby3114 · July 2012

CountingUp:
If she's crying there's something wrong and one of us is usually there to help. If she's fussing but not actually crying we give her time to sort it out on her own.

This is me too. I'm ok with fussing. If he cries out I respond.

spacedolphin11 · July 2012

CountingUp:
If she's crying there's something wrong and one of us is usually there to help. If she's fussing but not actually crying we give her time to sort it out on her own.

Same here! DS fusses quite a lot but often is able to work it out on his own. When he's crying, though, I can't NOT hold him. Breaks my heart.

celiabwatson · July 2012

With number 1 it was very AP and I almost always went to him when he cried (unless I was in the bathroom or otherwise unable to come at that moment). With number 2 she has done more crying without me because there are more moments of being indisposed. My philosophy hasn't changed but my life has. However, I find myself more ok with listening to her cry and therefore less quick to respond when I am able. It's kind of heartbreaking to know that I can listen to her cry for a short time and be ok with it.

MrsT2008 · July 2012

ditto InTheSun.

khbe14 · July 2012

InTheSun:
KeyLime81:
I think there are different kinds of crying. If I hear his "distress" cry, I rush in right away. If it's simply an "I'm tired/frustrated and this is my way of dealing with it" cry, then I let him fuss a bit. If that cry starts escalating, then I step in.

This. If it's like "You put me in my pack n' play and that's not where I wanna be, b!tch!" Then I give him a few minutes to see if he'll get over it. If it's "I just smacked my head on the tile floor because I launched myself off of my play mat," then I rush to him. Then there's the classic, "You put me in my crib because I'm tired, I'm more tired than you thought so now I have to cry about it" cry and that warrants 10 minutes of ignoring followed by some pacifier therapy and patting.

Ditto on all points.

twocents6708 · July 2012

CountingUp:
If she's crying there's something wrong and one of us is usually there to help. If she's fussing but not actually crying we give her time to sort it out on her own.

This exactly.

asyph107 · July 2012

celiabwatson:
With number 1 it was very AP and I almost always went to him when he cried (unless I was in the bathroom or otherwise unable to come at that moment). With number 2 she has done more crying without me because there are more moments of being indisposed. My philosophy hasn't changed but my life has. However, I find myself more ok with listening to her cry and therefore less quick to respond when I am able. It's kind of heartbreaking to know that I can listen to her cry for a short time and be ok with it.

Mostly this. We tend to be on the fuss it out, cry respond side. however with a toddler who still is needy, if I know that DS2 is safe, sometimes he just has to tolerate a little more and sometimes that involves crying. It would be impossible for me to tend to them both without a little fussing or crankiness on either side sometimes. I mean just as DS2 may have to fuss sometimes while I do something for DS1, the reverse is true it just usually involves annoyed talking at me by DS1 as opposed to crying. Im a strong believer that kids need to feel loved, nurtured and supported but also realize the world does not revolve around them.

KYmama9286 · July 2012

asyph107:
Mostly this. We tend to be on the fuss it out, cry respond side. however with a toddler who still is needy, if I know that DS2 is safe, sometimes he just has to tolerate a little more and sometimes that involves crying. It would be impossible for me to tend to them both without a little fussing or crankiness on either side sometimes. I mean just as DS2 may have to fuss sometimes while I do something for DS1, the reverse is true it just usually involves annoyed talking at me by DS1 as opposed to crying. Im a strong believer that kids need to feel loved, nurtured and supported but also realize the world does not revolve around them.

This- its inevitable that both kids will need something at the same time so one of them just has to cry and wait. Depending on the situation I generally tend to DS first just because his needs are met much faster (he needs a drink, I just fill a sippy and hand it to him vs making a bottle, sitting and feeding DD). I have gotten pretty good at doing almost everything with a baby on my hip but I've also accepted that sometimes kids are just going to have to cry- as #3 of 4 I am sure I had times where I had to sit and cry and I'm not any worse for wear. Obviously if its a time where a child is sick or hurt than I try to really minimize any crying but for the most part there is just a child crying and thats okay.

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