To know...or not to know...

cmravenell · July 2012

I'm kind of up in the air on finding out what we're having. We are 12 weeks today and some of our family members have been suggesting that we keep the baby's gender a secret but my husband really wants to know. It really doesn't matter to me either way but what should I do????

letitbe3 · July 2012

If it doesn't really matter to you either way and hubby really wants to know, I would say find out. It's your guys' baby - not your family's. If they want a secret, they can keep it secret if they ever have a child.

Allycat11 · July 2012

I think if your husband really wants to know, and you don't care, it makes sense to find out. The rest of your family really doesn't have a say because it is not their child. If you really wanted to, just the two of you could find out and just not share the information with anyone else.

karen_loy · July 2012

letitbe3:
If it doesn't really matter to you either way and hubby really wants to know, I would say find out. It's your guys' baby - not your family's. If they want a secret, they can keep it secret if they ever have a child.

I totally agree! If it's important to him then find out

AuntieKelsey07 · July 2012

letitbe3:
If it doesn't really matter to you either way and hubby really wants to know, I would say find out. It's your guys' baby - not your family's. If they want a secret, they can keep it secret if they ever have a child.

Yes

Mom2anAngel2 · July 2012

Allycat11:
I think if your husband really wants to know, and you don't care, it makes sense to find out. The rest of your family really doesn't have a say because it is not their child. If you really wanted to, just the two of you could find out and just not share the information with anyone else.

This exactly!

jobiann · July 2012

A lot of our family wishes we wouldn't find out either but we decided we want to know. We'd just feel better prepared deciding the name and to do all our shopping before baby arrives.

It is your and your H's decision, do what you want to do.

We are going to have our u/s tech or doctor keep the sex a secret and put it in a sealed envelope then we are having a cake made with either blue or pink as the layer icing to surprise DH and I and DH's parents and siblings. It's the first grandchild in his family so we thought it would be fun!

qteepie42899 · July 2012

If hubby wants to know but family doesnt, then just u two find out and keep that lil secret for you both to have. Gender neutral big ticket items are still cute and great for future babies if you plan to have more.

spartyparty · July 2012

I don't think your families really have any say in this - other than maybe you shouldn't tell them if you do find out. Do what you and DH prefer!

JJsMum · July 2012

DH and I found out with DS and told everyone. This time we are still thinking of finding out, but keeping it to the two of us until LO is here. Of course, we change our minds weekly, so who knows what we'll do!

KingRay09 · July 2012

letitbe3:
If it doesn't really matter to you either way and hubby really wants to know, I would say find out. It's your guys' baby - not your family's. If they want a secret, they can keep it secret if they ever have a child.

This

BLPL101 · July 2012

My MIL seems annoyed that we're finding out and my neighbors asked me if we're finding out and when we said "Yes" a few of them made comments like "You really should reconsider" Um...seriously? All of those people kept it a secret so they think I should too? Why do they even care? Sorry, but it just annoyed me.

Little Dawson · July 2012

I was up for keeping it secret with LO #1, but DH wanted to know, so we found out. It made it easier for first time to get gender specific things and ask for gender specific in registries. But we wanted to do more gender specific and were ok with finding out etc. Will probably do the same with this pregnancy!

kenna_4 · July 2012

We were team green last time, my DH didn't want to be, but I never wanted to know. It was amazing, nothing is better than going through labour and then hearing it's a _____! He even admitted it was awesome. This time we are going to find out, he wants to, I said fine, but he has wavered back and forth a bit because it was so cool last time. As for your kid not having any clothes or anything because you didn't find out, that's BS. Everybody is so exciting once they find out all they do is buy you clothes, I hardly used my gender neutral clothes because of this. All of our big ticket items can be used again, which I love, it seems like such a waste to get rid of a car seat just because it's pink and you have a boy.

ellaNu630 · July 2012

If you really don't care either way, then find out for your hubby. You can always choose to keep the secret to yourselves and not share with anyone else.

Shelly038 · July 2012

I'm the same way. Doesn't really matter to me but it's important to my husband that we find out. He wants to be prepared! I say find out and don't let your family members know if they want to be surprised!

clariknittist · July 2012

jobiann:
A lot of our family wishes we wouldn't find out either but we decided we want to know. We'd just feel better prepared deciding the name and to do all our shopping before baby arrives.

It is your and your H's decision, do what you want to do.

We are going to have our u/s tech or doctor keep the sex a secret and put it in a sealed envelope then we are having a cake made with either blue or pink as the layer icing to surprise DH and I and DH's parents and siblings. It's the first grandchild in his family so we thought it would be fun!

That is a really cute idea!

I think if you're neutral on finding out and your husband wants to know, as PPs have said you should just find out. That doesn't mean you have to tell your opinionated family.

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