OB said, "Eh...sorry. It's nature." Regarding MC

posvane · July 2012

Had an appt today with my OB regarding my MC last week. He was on vacation and my MC was more like a CP and didn't last long, so there was no emergency.

Aside from having me explain why I didn't see him right away (I wanted to smack him because he was the one on vacation), he casually, sarcastically said, "Eh... sorry. (Shrugged shoulders) It's nature."

I know to him this is medicine/life. But, to me it's not just that. No compassion!

He did order and HCG test. After I get the results, I am calling for my records. I've had it with him. If I can't trust DH (see yesterday's post) and I can't trust my OB to be compassionate (especially since this is my 2nd MC), than what man can I trust!?

None! My next OB will be a woman!

monimu13 · July 2012

Oh my, so sorry that he acted that way. You definitely need somebody you can trust...move on. Sorry for your loss.

SarahMeyer0823 · July 2012

Yikes!! I'm so sorry...that's awful

I'd definitely be getting a new doc too!

rayofsunshine99 · July 2012

Most doctors, even women will not run testing after two miscarriages. It's true that it is nature and every pregnancy has about a 20% chance for miscarriage. It sucks that he was insensitive about it but his statement was accurate.

Also what is the HSG test for? Unless you were having trouble conceiving and/or your pregnancies were ectopic, then an HSG is not going to tell you anything.

But you got pregnant, obviously so you know that your tubes are clear enough for sperm to meet the egg, and assuming they were uterine pregnancies, then they're clear enough for the fertilized embryo to make it to your uterus. So why the HSG?

posvane · July 2012

rayofsunshine99:
Most doctors, even women will not run testing after two miscarriages. It's true that it is nature and every pregnancy has about a 20% chance for miscarriage. It sucks that he was insensitive about it but his statement was accurate.
Also what is the HSG test for? Unless you were having trouble conceiving and/or your pregnancies were ectopic, then an HSG is not going to tell you anything.
But you got pregnant, obviously so you know that your tubes are clear enough for sperm to meet the egg, and assuming they were uterine pregnancies, then they're clear enough for the fertilized embryo to make it to your uterus. So why the HSG?

Oops HSG. He wants to make sure my levels are normal. Right now, I'm not going for a two day test. It's only one blood draw.

EIsieMae · July 2012

posvane:
rayofsunshine99:
Most doctors, even women will not run testing after two miscarriages. It's true that it is nature and every pregnancy has about a 20% chance for miscarriage. It sucks that he was insensitive about it but his statement was accurate.
Also what is the HSG test for? Unless you were having trouble conceiving and/or your pregnancies were ectopic, then an HSG is not going to tell you anything.
But you got pregnant, obviously so you know that your tubes are clear enough for sperm to meet the egg, and assuming they were uterine pregnancies, then they're clear enough for the fertilized embryo to make it to your uterus. So why the HSG?
Oops HSG. He wants to make sure my levels are normal. Right now, I'm not going for a two day test. It's only one blood draw.

Did you mean HCG?

purplepeanut6 · July 2012

Im sorry Pos! He sounds like an....

KdgTeacher · July 2012

rayofsunshine99:

Most doctors, even women will not run testing after two miscarriages. It's true that it is nature and every pregnancy has about a 20% chance for miscarriage. It sucks that he was insensitive about it but his statement was accurate.

Also what is the HSG test for? Unless you were having trouble conceiving and/or your pregnancies were ectopic, then an HSG is not going to tell you anything.

But you got pregnant, obviously so you know that your tubes are clear enough for sperm to meet the egg, and assuming they were uterine pregnancies, then they're clear enough for the fertilized embryo to make it to your uterus. So why the HSG?

Reading fail on your part. She said HCG in her OP...meaning checking to see if her levels get back to 0

posvane · July 2012

mananana:
rayofsunshine99:
Most doctors, even women will not run testing after two miscarriages. It's true that it is nature and every pregnancy has about a 20% chance for miscarriage. It sucks that he was insensitive about it but his statement was accurate.
Also what is the HSG test for? Unless you were having trouble conceiving and/or your pregnancies were ectopic, then an HSG is not going to tell you anything.
But you got pregnant, obviously so you know that your tubes are clear enough for sperm to meet the egg, and assuming they were uterine pregnancies, then they're clear enough for the fertilized embryo to make it to your uterus. So why the HSG?
The OP says HCG- unless she just edited that to fix it? So basically a beta draw.
I'm sorry for your loss. I would be going over his head and complaining. That was unprofessional, and frankly douchetastic.

I thought I said that right. HCG - beta draw, correct. Yeah - there isn't anyone else in charge. He is the only OB there. I may write a letter to him or something after I get my records. He has a laundry list of "offenses" in my book. I always appreciated him because he is a brilliant doctor. But he is a terribly insensitive man.

rayofsunshine99 · July 2012

KdgTeacher:
rayofsunshine99:

Most doctors, even women will not run testing after two miscarriages. It's true that it is nature and every pregnancy has about a 20% chance for miscarriage. It sucks that he was insensitive about it but his statement was accurate.

Also what is the HSG test for? Unless you were having trouble conceiving and/or your pregnancies were ectopic, then an HSG is not going to tell you anything.

But you got pregnant, obviously so you know that your tubes are clear enough for sperm to meet the egg, and assuming they were uterine pregnancies, then they're clear enough for the fertilized embryo to make it to your uterus. So why the HSG?

Reading fail on your part. She said HCG in her OP...meaning checking to see if her levels get back to 0

Whoops, guilty as charged. Sorry OP.

posvane · July 2012

rayofsunshine99:
KdgTeacher:
rayofsunshine99:

Most doctors, even women will not run testing after two miscarriages. It's true that it is nature and every pregnancy has about a 20% chance for miscarriage. It sucks that he was insensitive about it but his statement was accurate.

Also what is the HSG test for? Unless you were having trouble conceiving and/or your pregnancies were ectopic, then an HSG is not going to tell you anything.

But you got pregnant, obviously so you know that your tubes are clear enough for sperm to meet the egg, and assuming they were uterine pregnancies, then they're clear enough for the fertilized embryo to make it to your uterus. So why the HSG?

Reading fail on your part. She said HCG in her OP...meaning checking to see if her levels get back to 0
Whoops, guilty as charged. Sorry OP.

No problem.

reederah · July 2012

Ugh, that is awful. I'm glad your getting a new doc!

SCSmith2011 · July 2012

I'm so sorry he was insensative. I'm so sick of docs today.

BellaLux · July 2012

I'm so sorry, "nature" is not an excuse for being insensitive, it's still a loss. Hope you have a new/better OB soon. Good luck!

atelyce · July 2012

I'm so sorry for your loss! That is just awful that the doc said that to you! I definitely agree, time to move onto someone with more compassion (and I think a woman doc could empathize a little more as well).

CutieBean79 · July 2012

Oh no, that is unacceptable. It may be true (DUH, we know that nature sucks sometimes), but it is not good bedside manner & really doesn't strengthen your trust in him. My doctor is a man and is wonderfully compasionate while also being medically honest. I am surprised even more that your doctor said this after your second m/c. If it was the first one (like mine) then ok, sh!t happens. But after a second one I think a little more investigation would be warranted. GL

PrimRoseMama · July 2012

I am so sorry. What a lack of compassion & sensitivity.

curlylocks3 · July 2012

I'm sorry for your loss and for that experience. It truly was an insensitive thing to say, even if miscarriages are natural. Good luck with finding a new doctor- I'd recommend not just point-blank picking a woman though but instead asking some friends you trust to recommend theirs so you know you're getting someone with a good beside manner.

JonBon18 · July 2012

I'm really sorry for your loss, and that your Dr is suuuuch an a-hole. You'll be better off with someone else, best wished finding a better Dr who is also a better person.

posvane · July 2012

curlylocks3:
I'm sorry for your loss and for that experience. It truly was an insensitive thing to say, even if miscarriages are natural. Good luck with finding a new doctor- I'd recommend not just point-blank picking a woman though but instead asking some friends you trust to recommend theirs so you know you're getting someone with a good beside manner.

The new OB is one that a close friend went to and loves. I hear great review of the new OB.

notquiteblushing · July 2012

I'm sorry you're having a tough time but I resent the implication that all men are untrustworthy just because your doctor was insensitive and you have problems with your husband. I hope counseling helps on Sunday and going forward.

curlylocks3 · July 2012

posvane:
curlylocks3:
I'm sorry for your loss and for that experience. It truly was an insensitive thing to say, even if miscarriages are natural. Good luck with finding a new doctor- I'd recommend not just point-blank picking a woman though but instead asking some friends you trust to recommend theirs so you know you're getting someone with a good beside manner.
The new OB is one that a close friend went to and loves. I hear great review of the new OB.

I'm a little confused (and granted, my brain is fuzzy right now) but I think you're saying you already found a new OB that someone recommended to you? If so, thats great! I read your OP as saying that you were going to have to look for one. I wish you the best with everything moving forward.

saintpaulJess · July 2012

What an azzhole. I'm sorry.

heiferlump · July 2012

Bless your heart, that's awful! I would leave, too!

Jnelle05 · July 2012

I'm sorry you had to deal with that insensitive d-bag!! Good luck on finding a new doc... I just recently had to find a new OBGYN and it's a process-- I did A LOT of research... Healthgrades.com and RateMDs.com are both great websites to see patient reviews, any malpractice history, accepting insurance companies, etc.

Want a personalized experience?

OB said, "Eh...sorry. It's nature." Regarding MC

Re: OB said, &quot;Eh...sorry. It's nature.&quot; Regarding MC

LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:

Choose Another Board

Search Boards

Want a personalized experience?

OB said, &quot;Eh...sorry. It's nature.&quot; Regarding MC

Re: OB said, &amp;quot;Eh...sorry. It&#039;s nature.&amp;quot; Regarding MC

LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:

Choose Another Board

Search Boards

OB said, "Eh...sorry. It's nature." Regarding MC

Re: OB said, "Eh...sorry. It's nature." Regarding MC