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Doula choice

TCMom78TCMom78 member
in VBAC

Choice 1: attended over 150 births, I liked her but she seemed a little "matter of fact" in general (not overly loving/friendly) during our phone screen, although perfectly pleasant and extremely knowledgeable.  She has no kids of her own-- only step children

Choice 2: attended only 20 births (doula for two years) and has 2 kids-- had a VBAC (natural) with a doula herself and then became one!  We really connected over the phone and she was very non-judgy.  She works as a team and I need to talk to her partner too because you will get the one "on call" but she said they are similar in style/philosophy.  I asked for references and this pair is also $500 cheaper than choice 1.  Also the partner has only been a doula for one yr... And been to only 10 births.

 Would you go with personality  vs experience?  My husband and I just want to be able to trust someone to lead us through to vaginal delivery-- I am convinced that I need no epi or light epi to succeed based on my first birth experience.  WWYD?  Assuming everyone's references are glowing... 

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Re: Doula choice

  • MeggM1MeggM1 member

    I'm still in the super early stages (i.e. googling) of looking for a doula, but I would personally go with option 2.  It matters to me that my practitioner is experienced, but I see a doula more as an advocate and coach, and the second doula actually having had a vbac herself would make a huge difference to me.  20 births is 19 more births than I've attended, and she's also been through training.  And I'm big about gut feelings - if you click that says a lot.  If you are looking for loving/friendly and didn't see that in a phone consult, I wouldn't count on seeing it during the delivery.

    Anyway, based on this info alone I'd go with #2 - personality and PERSONAL experience vs. x number of births.

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  • ldbryanldbryan member
    I would choose #2.  I agree with PP--I think the fact that she's had children herself makes a difference to me. Also, you want someone you're comfortable with.  The last thing you're going to want to worry about when you're in labor is whether you feel comfortable and trust your doula. I think 20 is a pretty well experienced person even though 150 is a lot more. 
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  • TwizzleTwizzle member

    I'm late to this post, but I faced a similar decision and I went with the one that I had a better personality fit with.  One of the doulas I interviewed is *the* VBAC doula in our area--she attends many, many VBACs and is also one of the ICAN leaders.  However, I just didn't think our personalities meshed that well (DH felt this way even more than me).  I also felt like she would be a little too strict with us if that makes sense.  At the other end of the spectrum was one that we really got along well with but had no VBAC experience.  We chose one more in the middle that had some (but not a lot) VBAC experience and we got along with.  She also seemed the most prepared and most like me in birth philosophy. We had our first prenatal last week and I'm so happy with our choice. We get along so well.  I think that's the most important.

    I also think someone who has been through a VBAC herself will be really great as a VBAC doula. 

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