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May 2012 Moms
chefgirl182003
member
Anyone else still feel a mess?
chefgirl182003
member
My Lo is seven weeks old and I still like a huge mess. I don't know if it's because today was a bad day, DS was extremely fussy, screaming all day, fighting sleep or maybe because we haven't really gotten a routine down yet. But I still find myself getting overwhelmed, starving cuz I never have a free hand, and dreaming of the days that I could straighten my hair and not feel so frumpy. My husband works extremely long hours and I don't have any friends or family close by so I'm just wondering if anyone else is going through this or do I just need to figure out how to get it together? I'm a ftm and worry that I should be able to do more than I'm doing and maybe be better at this whole mom thing.
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Re: Anyone else still feel a mess?
I was thinking the same thing I'm better with my second and now third than my first. I think it's all the ftm worrying that takes so much time and energy.
Oh yeah and since becoming a mom 8 years ago I've straightened my hair only if I was going some place very special. It's become more about functional style for me.
I feel that way sometimes too. I started working yesterday and I made me feel better. I think because I made myself look really nice and I had a break from the baby. I missed him a lot and I couldn't wait to pick him up from daycare but doing that made me feel more human again.
On a day your H has off, can you ask him to babysit for a few hours while you make yourself look nice and go out somewhere and do something for yourself? I know when I got a haircut that helped tremendously and I was only gone 1/2 an hour!
Don't "should" all over yourself. Your baby is surviving, right? Then you are the perfect mother that your little one needs right now. You're also not alone. I'm a complete mess, so is my house and my private practice that I returned to. But it's all okay and will get less messy...eventually...when life needs to be less messy. Right now, we all have to accept and, dare I suggest, LOVE our messiness; even laugh at it. We will be able to look back and laugh at the constant ponytails, spit up on our shirts and baby items strewn everywhere eventually.
Do something for yourself every day. Treat yourself kind because you deserve it. And find the humor in it all.
I feel like a mess too.
I actually felt like I had it together for a few weeks there... my daughter is miserably fussy for hours in the evening, but at least I could count on one good 1-2 hour nap in the morning so I could put on real clothes, deodorant, and brush my hair.
Now she's totally regressed and won't sleep for more than 20 minutes during the day, and even then only if I'm holding her. She wants a boob in her mouth constantly or she screams, and I literally spend hours at a time sitting on the couch holding her.
The one thing that did help me feel sane was taking walks with her in the sling, she'd usually fall asleep for a little while. Now it's over 100 degrees every day so we can't go outside, but I live a mile from the mall and I take her there and just walk in circles for a while... it really helps my mood.
Don't feel bad for feeling like a mess. It's so hard. I keep reminding myself to enjoy this time because I know it will be over so fast, but it feels impossible.