- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Single Parents
Crystal318
member
Terrible two's/Mommy Meltdowns/Loneliness/etc
Crystal318
member
Hey Ladies, its been awhile since I posted. I hope you are doing well!
Long story short, I have been a single mom since October when I finally asked my drug addicted ex-fiance to leave. It has been a complete roller coaster of events since then to say the least. Ex has been in and out of the picture (not romantically just as my sons dad) since then but the drug abuse just kept getting worse and worse.There was a DV charge back in december and ex has been on probabtion ever since. He failed a court ordered drug test and along with some other series of events his probabtion is most likely being revoked. As it stands right now he is court ordered to have no contact with our son or I....which is perfectly fine with me. I have been attending my own Alanon meetings and personal counseling sessions since December and I would say that I am handling the situation pretty well most of the time.....but sometimes I just want to break and fall into a million pieces.
I am sick of being strong. I work full time, live alone with my son, run the household, pay all the bills, recieve no child support (even though I am supposed to), my family all live 1000 miles away, so I dont get much help, my son is twenty months old and is starting to throw fits and go through sleeping changes and declaring his "independence". I know most of you guys are going through very similar situations. Dont you ever just feel like you are on the verge of a breakdown?
I hate when I get to this point of feeling sorry for myself but sometimes I just cant help it. I want to cry. I want someone to take care of me. I need a break. I need a vacation. Just venting I guess. I have been so strong for this long but the past few weeks (weekends), I have just been so overwhelmed and impatient and I feel so bad about it. I just feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. I know this is just a phase, I hope.
We go to parks, and indoor play places and the lake and the pool and to arcades (similar to chuckie cheese), etc. but I just feel like we are on the go go go all day everyday from sun up to sundown. As you know 20 month old boys do not sit still for a minute! I'm getting worn down.
What do you guys do to help yourself from getting into a funk? Its normal to feel this way sometimes, right? Please tell me its normal!
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Terrible two's/Mommy Meltdowns/Loneliness/etc
I know how you feel. I am engaged now, but before, it was so hard. I had my parents though...I couldn't imagine what you are going through. I too, do not receive child support and my car payment and her daycare costs more than one paycheck. It is so hard to make ends meet.
It is okay to cry and to vent. We all need it! I know it sure helps me. I actually had to get on Paxil to help me sort out things because I would cry all the time. Now that XH is out of DDs like (he wants to give up his rights b/c he does not want to pay c/s) I am slowly trying to get off of Paxil. It did help a lot though.
Anywho, we are here for you and always willing to listen! Good luck and keep your chin up!
It's hard for sure, and there is no reason to beat yourself up. You are a strong person for admitting you could use a hand and a break. It's a hard thing to admit, but you are a better person when you do. I know how the stresses can mount, I don't get child support right now (probably won't ever) and it takes every penny I have to pay for child care, rent, etc. I don't even have a car or a way to get one right now. It stresses me out like you wouldn't believe.
I understand where you are, I don't have anyone where I live. I do have family about an hour away and we go to visit a lot for two reasons, one, I love my family and they love my little one, and two, sometimes, I need five minutes. We all need five minutes. And it is ok to admit that...and if you are luck...take it.
We just hit one year over the weekend and I sit and wonder what life will be like this time next year, I know from experience with my former step-daughter, that the 2-3's can be a trying time in a child's life.
You can get through it, I know it's hard. I wish I had other single mom's around as support, someone to talk too, someone that gets it (because other people don't get it), but that is why we have this board, so we can talk to others that know what it's like.
Me too!! Do you happen to live in GA?
Sadly, no, not anywhere close.
Huge hugs to you. I understand, completely. We all have our moments. You know what? Sometimes it's ok to cry, vent, scream, breakdown once in awhile. I'm not saying do it in front of DS. But after he goes to sleep, pour yourself a glass of wine, draw a hot bath, and let your emotions out. If you keep trying to suppress them you might have a panic attack.
I have bad days all.the.time. The important thing is to find a way to get through them. Sometimes that means doing a little something for yourself, like getting your favorite coffee drink, or splurging on a pedi (if you have a reliable sitter). You have a lot on your plate and everyone deserves a break.
I know this stage is really hard with DS. They are SOOOO busy and it's tough to find that energy. I have a bike for DS and he loves to go on bike rides. It's good for me because I get out and walk and then he can burn off some energy. Going to the park is nice as well. Do you have any mommy friends you can do a playdate with?