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When does this get easier?

nikkivonnekronikkivonnekro
in Single Parents

So over the last couple days ive been reading a lot on seperation and how it can affect our children especially children as young as my LOs. So I send a few articles to my ex for him to read as well as asking him if we can try to get ahold for our daughters sake and that they both deserve to have us in there lives etc. He never responded. He was suppose to have our daughter today from 2-11 he text me at work at 7 saying he was dropping her off with my mom at 930. I told him that was fine but from now on he needs to ask and not just tell us what he is doing in case my mom has plans. He acted completely like an ass when I told him that saying that it was for me he was dropping her off early so that I didnt have to pick her up but I know it was so he could go to the bar and drink.

He also informed me today that he had no food at his house for our daughter and I told him I would send her with food but from now on he needed to make sure he had all the supplies she needs while she is with him which pissed him off even more. I tried to talk to him today and tell him we really need to figure this out and his response was that he didnt have to *** talk to me about anything. It broke me down and made me cry I finally gave him a big FU over the phone and hung up. I swear he knows im on "bedrest" yet he doesnt care how stressed out I am or how much he hurts me. At this point I dont want him anywhere near this baby cause its obvious he doesnt give a damn about her or me.

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Re: When does this get easier?

  • pinitbabypinitbaby member
    I don't know how long ago it was that you guys separated but it gets easier when the anger subsides. It's different for everybody I guess but that's when I found it easier to deal with. They will always be an ass, you just have to accept it and know that you are the bigger better person and frankly you dont need him and neither does your child..sometimes as much as we want it to work for the kids it ends up doing more bad than good because the parent's aren't on the same page. I'm sure you're doing the best you can girl, don't ever give up!!
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  • preggersin2011preggersin2011 member

    What is in your court order regarding "supplies" etc? I dont have much advise since LO's father and I were never together. When I was younger my older half sisters would get dropped off for the weekend and their mother wouldnt have half of the necessary clothes packed, ie shirts but no shorts and underwear.  You can either send everything, food and clothes, each time or worry about what he is feeding your child & if you would approve. I can tell you that I had a coworker who recorded every conversation he had with his ex-wife and used that in court against her to get shared custody taken away. I would be careful of what you say over the phone, in person, and in writing. Also, facebook and other websites that you publicly post to are admissible in court. 

    Why are you upset he dropped off your LO early so he can go drink? (11pm vs 930pm? i assume) most orders say 1 hour before bed time.  I take my LO out with myself and my friends to family friendly bars and she sleeps in the stroller. if he took your LO along and dropped her with beer on his breath you would be even more upset.  Yes, the last minute time change was unexpected but why did he bring your LO to your mom's and not your place? 

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  • rockabetty1rockabetty1
    Sorry you're going through this. *hugs* Maybe you should keep track of all these things just in case.
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  • nikkivonnekronikkivonnekro
    imagepreggersin2011:

    What is in your court order regarding "supplies" etc? I dont have much advise since LO's father and I were never together. When I was younger my older half sisters would get dropped off for the weekend and their mother wouldnt have half of the necessary clothes packed, ie shirts but no shorts and underwear.  You can either send everything, food and clothes, each time or worry about what he is feeding your child & if you would approve. I can tell you that I had a coworker who recorded every conversation he had with his ex-wife and used that in court against her to get shared custody taken away. I would be careful of what you say over the phone, in person, and in writing. Also, facebook and other websites that you publicly post to are admissible in court. 

    Why are you upset he dropped off your LO early so he can go drink? (11pm vs 930pm? i assume) most orders say 1 hour before bed time.  I take my LO out with myself and my friends to family friendly bars and she sleeps in the stroller. if he took your LO along and dropped her with beer on his breath you would be even more upset.  Yes, the last minute time change was unexpected but why did he bring your LO to your mom's and not your place? 

     

    I keep track of all of our conversations including text messages, when and where he drops off LO, and I record phone calls we have. I work from 2-11 pm 5 days a week so I am not home at 930 so he calls my mom up and asks to drop LO off there. ITs not my mothers responsible to care for my LO its his and mine. She doesnt mind but she happened to have plans that night that she had to cancel because he wanted to go out with his friends drinking. My mom doesnt get much time out because she also cares for my grandmother who has dementia so in a lot of ways its like raising another child and its hard for my mom to balance between the two. We have an arrangment that every other week he watches her while I work from 2-11 so yes im a little irrated he dropped her off early especially when he consistantly complains about not having enough time with her yet he cant keep her for a full 8 hours.

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  • bexrambexram
    imagepreggersin2011:

    What is in your court order regarding "supplies" etc? I dont have much advise since LO's father and I were never together. When I was younger my older half sisters would get dropped off for the weekend and their mother wouldnt have half of the necessary clothes packed, ie shirts but no shorts and underwear.  You can either send everything, food and clothes, each time or worry about what he is feeding your child & if you would approve. I can tell you that I had a coworker who recorded every conversation he had with his ex-wife and used that in court against her to get shared custody taken away. I would be careful of what you say over the phone, in person, and in writing. Also, facebook and other websites that you publicly post to are admissible in court. 

    Why are you upset he dropped off your LO early so he can go drink? (11pm vs 930pm? i assume) most orders say 1 hour before bed time.  I take my LO out with myself and my friends to family friendly bars and she sleeps in the stroller. if he took your LO along and dropped her with beer on his breath you would be even more upset.  Yes, the last minute time change was unexpected but why did he bring your LO to your mom's and not your place? 

     

    uhhh..what? and yes id be pissed if he was dropping her off to go drink he should neither drop her off to go drink OR take her to the bar with him (wtf)..he should be spending time with his daughter. I'm sorry youre going through this I hope it all resolves soon.

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