Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
White0rchid
member
Re: If you've already had a c/s, can we talk stitches vs staples?
My OB did stitches but I spent the morning throwing up after the c/s and I think I ripped it open. The afternoon nurse noticed and I had to have 7 staples put in one side. I could really feel the last few go in but you shouldn't if you have them put in during surgery.
i had mine taken out just before I was discharged and it wasn't painful at all. I only stayed 2 nights. My OB actually said he preferred staples but other drs and some patients freak out about having staples put in them.
With my first, I had dissolvable stitches and steri-strips. No big deal, the stitches did their thing and I let the steri-strips fall off on their own.
I had staples with my second. I didn't feel or notice a difference from the stitches, honestly. I had them removed about 6 or 7 days pp. It didn't hurt - I actually didn't feel when my doctor was taking them out.
I didn't request either type. My doctor said he likes to do the staples for the repeat c/s.
I had an emergency c-sec under general as well, but I got staples.
I had them removed at 7 days pp and got a bad infection 3 days later :-(
~after 34 cycles we finally got our 2nd little bundle of joy~
My IF blog
BFP #2 March 2011, Baby Girl born November 2011!!!
This for me too. They took the staples out the morning I left (they didn't keep me longer because of it, the 3rd day they would have done it but I decided to stay the extra day). And the steristrips came off by themselves w/in a week of leaving the hospital.
Ive only had staples, and had no problems with them. They were taken out the second week, and I was nervous about it hurting, but it doesn't at all. I don't really have anything to compare it to because this is my first. But alot of people I know who had stitches, their stitches opened at home.....and I was nervous about that happening, but everything was fine, and healed well.
Can you get dermabond? That stuff is awesome-no getting anything removed and the incision is practically nonexistant.
I had staples the first time and they were removed on the third day and I had steri-strips put on. The second time I had dermabond and it worked great, I got to leave after two days. The only thing with that is it would NOT come off. I finally said something at my 4 (or was it 6? I CRS.) week check up and my Dr. gave me some wipes that take the rest of it off. I guess I don't really have a preference though because each time I healed well.
I've only had experience with dermabond, but that stuff is amazing! My incision healed perfectly, and 6 months out it looks the same as my stretch marks, and even better than some of my worse stretch marks!
It did say on for awhile, but part of that might be because I was really scared to touch my incision for weeks afterwards. I finally go the nerve a few weeks post op, and I was able to easily peel off the remaining stuff in the shower.
I had dissolvable stitches with my first and staples with my second. I was afraid to get the staples out because I thought it would hurt but it didn't. I healed really well with staples and didn't have anymore pain than with the stitches.
I know it's hard with 2 kids already but really try to take it easy with your recovery so you don't bust stitches again or staples. That sounds painful.
With DD I had an emercency c-section and ended up with stitches and steri strips. I got a really bed reaction from the steri strips. Blisters ect.
With DS my doctor did stitches again (he told me it makes a nicer scar) however I did not get the steri strips this time around. They left them off. I also got really sick from the spinal and was throwing up for the entire day after my c-section. They gave me nubain to help with it but I got really sick from that so later in that night I requested Zofran through my IV and it helped.
I never had problems with popping stitches at all. I did sit with a pillow on my incision for the first week or so after so maybe that helped. I wish I would have stayed the third night as well instead of coming home but I was sick of sitting in the hospital bed, my back and tailbone killed and I wanted to get home to my DD.
The first time my OB was peeling off chunks of dermabond at my 6 week checkup. The second time around, I was smarter and peeled off whatever was remaining while I soaked in a hot tub the day before my 6 week checkup.
I had derma bond. My Dr. said to peel it off after two weeks. I did and my scar is very faint