I don't know if I can do this — The Bump
Babies: 0 - 3 Months

I don't know if I can do this

DH is out of town for a week and DD's sleep habits have been horrible lately.  I started her bedtime at 6:15 (now 8:30) and she's fallen asleep numerous times but won't stay asleep.  The crying is killing me.  Nothing I have done has helped, and I've done every.thing.  She's in her swing fussing now.  I'm sitting here crying. 

I just wish DH was here to help.  I wish I was a better mother.  I wish she would fall asleep and get some rest. 

I am so lost and I feel so alone.

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Re: I don't know if I can do this

  • You can do it~ you ARE a good mom. Take a 10 minute break, you need it, then go back to her. Being upset while trying to calm a baby is hard - and sometimes just makes things worse. 

  • Is there anyone you can call to give you a little break? ?A friend, your mom, a neighbor? ?If he nights are terrible, try and get someone to help during the day.

    My heart goes out to you...sleep whenever you can, even if its just a half hour.

    Your not alone...?

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  • Hey - you're a great mom!!! ?Fussiness happens sometimes. ?FWIW, someone posted the other day that when all else fails, put DC in the water. ?Even if the two of you get into the bath. ?

    Is DD teething??

  • hang in there and stay calm.
  • Oh - I'm so sorry that you are going through this.  Seems like this is going around today!  Just know that you are not a bad mother, and this too will pass.  A few ideas, if you haven't tried already, bathtime, white noise (vacuum, hairdryer?), baby massage, sitting on wash machine, go for a drive/walk (if weather allows)? Hope something helps...
  • Oh no... this happened to me today as well.  I put him in the moby and even though it was cold and there was five inches of snow on the ground, we bundled up and I went walking.  He fussed in there for about ten minutes, then fell asleep.  Im sure people thought we were crazy.  Something else that has also helped me is to turn on some soothing music and turn off all the lights, then just hold them and dance, even if they continue to cry, just concentrate on taking deep breaths and keeping it all together.  It is ok for you to cry too!  I am so sorry, you are a wonderful mother and I hope it gets better soon!
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  • Of course you are a great  mom! And I'm sure it sucks being alone, but I know you can do it. Let her swing for a few minutes, take a break outside, and come back and try again. Sometimes Alaina will fuss at bedtime and the best thing to do is just play with her or stick her in the jumperoo for a few minutes to work out some energy.
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  • Thanks ladies. 

    Unfortunately I don't have any family in the area, and I'm not close enough with any friends to feel comfortable calling them now.  If this last attempt at nursing to sleep doesn't help than I will try another bath (she already got 1 tonight).

    I don't see any evidence of teething, but you never know.  I think she just is way over tired.  I did my best to encourage naps today, but she wouldn't stay asleep then either.  She got one hour and a half nap at 12 but nothing more than 20 minutes since.

    Thanks for the tips, and for replying.  

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  • You are not a bad mother!  You aren't psychic and she can't talk -- so stop beating yourself up.  Have you ever just cried because you're having a _shit day and you've fallen into a funk?  Babies do that, too.  It will pass.

    Wish you lived here!  You could come over and hang with me, T & E.  Or I'd definitely baby-sit for you.

    :hugs:

    Remember to email if you want:  chalmette[at]live[dot]com

  • Hey, I'm right there with you. DD has started the 4 month wakeful and it sucks. She just won't stay asleep and it's driving me crazy. Just think that it will be over soon. And if I were you, I'd be expecting a big treat when your DH comes back (I'm thinking mani/pedi or some other spa treatment). Good luck!
  • I feel your stress! DH went away for a week in Oct right when Henry was hitting a good 4 month wakeful stride. Because I had clogged ducts when she came to help, my mom couldnt even get up with him. UGH!

    YOU CAN do it though! Try driving around if that helps. Go out, hit the mall with her in the front pack or stroller and see if she likes that. Lay with her (nurse her that way if you nurse). And sleep when you can! Call a friend to help. We all have these moments and more of us need to seek the help that family and friends are happy to give!

    Sending you smiles!!! :~)

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