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hosting shower

bdbelladonnabdbelladonna
in Baby Showers
so my dh asked his mom if she was still planning to hosting the shower or not and she was very non-commital. when he told me he could tell i was disappointed, i was looking forward to celebrating baby with close freidns and fam. so dh turns around and says that if she doesnt throw a shower he will throw one for me. which i feel weird about, he said he would work with my best friend who lives several hours away to plan it and give her credit for the shower but she wont be able to attend due to family commitments of her own (her 3 yearold is a cancer survivor and her follow ups are spanning most of the summer). so should i just tell him that i love him even more for wanting to do this for me but not to, or should i just let him ride his own train and do it
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Re: hosting shower

  • Sherbet LemonSherbet Lemon member
    It's sweet of him to offer, but it's right of you to decline. Hosting your own shower is considered rude. As your DH benefits from the gifts as well, he can't throw the shower either. If you want to celebrate the baby w/ friends and family, invite them over after your baby is born for a "meet the baby" party. If your DH wants to organize one of those, it would be ok. 

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  • rhubarb123rhubarb123 member

    imageSherbet Lemon:
    It's sweet of him to offer, but it's right of you to decline. Hosting your own shower is considered rude. As your DH benefits from the gifts as well, he can't throw the shower either. If you want to celebrate the baby w/ friends and family, invite them over after your baby is born for a "meet the baby" party. If your DH wants to organize one of those, it would be ok. 

    I agree.

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  • jeffsjaymejeffsjayme

    Tell him thanks, but no thanks.  Someone else will likely step up.  And if not, tell him to spend the money by taking you on a babymoon!

    ETA:According to your ticker information, this is your third baby?  You don't need a shower - that's why others aren't hosting it for you.  Have a meet the baby party.

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  • Sherbet LemonSherbet Lemon member
    imagejeffsjayme:

    Tell him thanks, but no thanks.  Someone else will likely step up.  And if not, tell him to spend the money by taking you on a babymoon!

    ETA:According to your ticker information, this is your third baby?  You don't need a shower - that's why others aren't hosting it for you.  Have a meet the baby party.

    I didn't notice that when I read the OP, but ditto.

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  • mben1119mben1119 member
    imagejeffsjayme:

    Tell him thanks, but no thanks.  Someone else will likely step up.  And if not, tell him to spend the money by taking you on a babymoon!

    ETA:According to your ticker information, this is your third baby?  You don't need a shower - that's why others aren't hosting it for you.  Have a meet the baby party.

    This exactly.  

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  • MiddleNameGraceMiddleNameGrace member
    imageSherbet Lemon:
    imagejeffsjayme:

    Tell him thanks, but no thanks.  Someone else will likely step up.  And if not, tell him to spend the money by taking you on a babymoon!

    ETA:According to your ticker information, this is your third baby?  You don't need a shower - that's why others aren't hosting it for you.  Have a meet the baby party.

    I didn't notice that when I read the OP, but ditto.

     

    Where I'm from it's not uncommon to have a shower for every baby whether you have 1 baby or 6.  BUT that's because showers are more a "shower with love and attention while the non-pregnant ones sip mojitos" type thing as opposed to "shower with stuff".  I completely agree that a "Meet the Baby" party would be perfect; it gives your hubby an opportunity to be really, really sweet, your whole famliy and friends get together and everybody's happy.

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  • BallSoxBallSox member
    Sorry, but I agree with the other posters.  To have a "hostess" that doesn't show up (although for understandable reasons) would be awkward at best.  Your husband should have nothing to do with the hosting/planning of the shower.
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  • 3monkeysmama3monkeysmama member
    imageMiddleNameGrace:
    imageSherbet Lemon:
    imagejeffsjayme:

    Tell him thanks, but no thanks.  Someone else will likely step up.  And if not, tell him to spend the money by taking you on a babymoon!

    ETA:According to your ticker information, this is your third baby?  You don't need a shower - that's why others aren't hosting it for you.  Have a meet the baby party.

    I didn't notice that when I read the OP, but ditto.

     

    Where I'm from it's not uncommon to have a shower for every baby whether you have 1 baby or 6.  BUT that's because showers are more a "shower with love and attention while the non-pregnant ones sip mojitos" type thing as opposed to "shower with stuff".  I completely agree that a "Meet the Baby" party would be perfect; it gives your hubby an opportunity to be really, really sweet, your whole famliy and friends get together and everybody's happy.

     

    It`s like this where I am from too, so my mom is throwing a sprinkle for me, even though it`s my third baby!  But I agree that DH should not plan the shower, and that if no on esteps up, you guys should plan a Meet the Baby party in the weeks after baby comes!  :) 

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