IHO it being slow, share a top embarassing story — The Bump

IHO it being slow, share a top embarassing story

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Re: IHO it being slow, share a top embarassing story

  • I "broke wind" when my Ob was examining me, close up, during labor!  I had had an epidural and didnt have much control but it was LOUD so I knew it happened.  I just said SORRY! and she laughed and said it happens all the time.  I was so mortified though!
  • During a large family dinner with my ex-BF and his family, BF rubbed his foot against mine under the table, so I started playing "footsie" with him. All of a sudden, BF's dad said very loudly "WHAT are you doing with my foot??".

    Yes, it was his dad and he had accidentally rubbed my foot to begin with. MORTIFIED. Ugh.

    Henry 4.23.2007 Elliot 3.30.2012


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  • I totally farted during sex last week and I thought i was going to die! This was the first time this has ever happened, luckily DH didnt hear me!! When we were done I told him sorry that I farted and then he told me that he didnt even notice - I could have gotton away with it!!!
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  • I went to a liberal arts college.  My first year there was a co-ed naked ultimate frisbee group.  It just seemed so horrifying to me to be naked like that outside... so I decided that by the time I graduated I WOULD do naked frisbee.  It was so NOT ME.

    Oh.  My.  God.  My memories 10 years later get me crying with laughter still... After frisbee we decided we had to streak so we started planning.  We were mostly women and ONE guy friend had the balls (no pun intended) to do it with us.  We made him lead...we plotted our trail, we did it at midnite, we even had champagne to drink to losen us up.

    So off we go (with a small crowd watching)... we all had our shoes and socks on and butt naked otherwise.  I couldn't held it - the energy and the nerves, I PEED.... down my leg.  Hello, naked peeing in public?!

    But it got worse.

    I wasn't actually in shape so the last 1/4 of the circle around campus I had to stop running.  And walk.  Naked. 

    A week after that we were at a pub and two of my gilfriends that did this with me admitted THEY TOO peed!  Only they SOAKED their socks with pee (I just dribbled.)  I almost peed my pants laughing at that.

    One benefit of being an idiot is it gives you a lifetime of laughs. :-)

  • I traveled to Barcelona with a really good friend of mine and a friend of hers I didn't know so well in 2002 and ended up getting food poisoning, though I didn't realize it at first. I was out on my own the day I started feeling sick, so I rushed back to our hostel just in time to make it to the bathroom and vomit. As I was throwing up I thought I had to pass some gas but, well, you can probably guess that it wasn't just gas. And since the hostel had shared bathrooms I then had to go back to our room and admit to this person I didn't know very well that I had just pooped in my pants and that's why I had to change my underwear.

    I was kind of embarrassed but I was honestly so ill that I didn't care too much. And she was the mom of a toddler, so I figured she was used to dealing with poo. 

    Alex (11/14/06) and Nate (5/25/10)
    "Want what you have, do what you can, be who you are." - Rev. Forrest Church
  • I used to be a newspaper reporter. I was doing a story at a national park station and was waiting for the next part of the event, so I was just wandering around. A bunch of people kept coming up to me and making small talk. I thought it was because I was one of the only dressed-up people there, and was looking so official. So after like 20 minutes of this I realized that the middle button on my shirt had popped open and my boobs were completely on display. At least I had a cute bra on, but I was mortified!

    But that was the day that I met DH (though he swears he never saw what I was displaying), so it wasn't all bad!

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  • in high school I was getting off the bus...but for some reason I did it backwards.  I had a big ass school bag and an enormous saxophone case so I couldn't turn around.  Well, I missed the step and fell off the bus out of the door.  My legs flew up in the air....and I was wearing a dress.

    Everyone flew to the window.

  • I'm always doing something embarassing.

    One time when I was interning in college I went to lunch with my supervisors and some others from the front office. I drove and the ticket director and media relations director were with me. This car behind me got right up on my tail as I was turning and I flipped them off. When we got inside one of my supervisors asked me if I flipped people off often. I had no idea it was him behind me. Oops.

    The best was a summer I was working at Disney. I was trying to catch the employee bus from my complex and it was about to leave. I broke out into a sprint and tripped in my sandals and took a nosedive into the grass. One of my friends was ont the bus and saw me. He said I just disappeared into the grass (costume was green). Lol. I still die laughing when I think about it.


  • oh, the footsie story reminded me of DH's most embarrasing moment.

    DH had just gotten off of a double shift and he met my family for dinner at my grandma's house.  DH got up off the couch, dazed from a brief nap, saw me at the counter and slapped my ass, all the while grabbing a handful and "tickling" me.  Well, it turned out that I was across the room, he grabbed my uncle's girlfriend's ass.  She is shaped similarly to me.  We both have brown hair and that day we both wore jeans. 

    He was mortified.  He didn't speak the entire dinner.  To this day whenever he sees the gf he is shy.

  • I actually wasn't too embarrassed by this, only because the other people were so wonderful about it, BUT . . .

    when I was PG with Brendan, I was a 1st grade teacher, and my students had planned a "surprise" shower for me for a week before my maternity leave.  Well, Brendan decided to make his appearance early, so the shower (on its original date) actually ended up being 3 days after he was born.  I didn't want to let my kids down, so since I lived literally 3 minutes from the school, Dave stayed home with Brendan and I went.

    About 45 minutes in (all I remember is being soooo foggy and so hot--gotta love those post-partum hormones!), one of the moms came up to me with my jacket, and all I could think was, "Why is she hurrying my out the door?".  But instead, she said to me, "Well, talk about your wet T-shirt contest!" and it turned out that my milk had come in, and I was completely SOAKED (and oblivious!). 

    All the moms had a good chuckle about that, but they were so wonderful to me that I really wasn't embarrassed at all.  As a matter of fact, they were all extremely helpful to me in those first few tough weeks, and I think back and was SO BLESSED to have such a great group of moms in my class that year . . . those poor ladies knew more personal stuff about me by the end of those first few weeks it was ridiculous!


  • belle, I'm just sitting her giggling and giggling at the mental image of you disappearing into the grass. LOL.
    Alex (11/14/06) and Nate (5/25/10)
    "Want what you have, do what you can, be who you are." - Rev. Forrest Church
  • image femmegem:
    belle, I'm just sitting her giggling and giggling at the mental image of you disappearing into the grass. LOL.

     Girl, it was too funny. Luckily it was my fav. driver and he stopped and waited.


    Oooh. I just remembered one that will make you laugh. My freshman yr of college I was leaving the student activities center and there was this hot group of guys standing close to where I parked. I got in, put the car in drive and then heard this AWFUL noise and felt a bump. I had driven over one of those yellow concrete things. The guys had to come over and push my car back over the barrier. Ugh

    Then there was the time I forgot to put on a bra and flashed the guy sitting across from me in Great Books when I stretched...and the time I raised my arms and my shirt came up so I flashed a work release prisoner at my h.s. ( I was working in the office on summer break).

    I told you...it's always something with me.


  • Oh, me too. I just can't remember most of them. But you reminded me of a particularly good one.

    When I was teaching kindergarten we were carving pumpkins. Of course this was the day we had people visiting the classroom, observing us. I was wearing some pants that were too loose on me, a tank top, and either a sweater or a suit jacket over the tank top. But as I was carving my pumpkin I got too hot so I took my top layer off and I was squatting so I could really work on that pumpkin. My partner teacher later told me that my underwear was completely on display, and of course (because how could this get any more embarrassing?) I was wearing a thong and OF COURSE the tag to my thong was sticking straight up in the air. LOL. Lord, those poor people who were observing us were either completely aghast or trying not to laugh out loud or both.

    I told some of my friends this story and they in turn forced me to tell it at every party they threw because they thought it was so hilarious. 

    Alex (11/14/06) and Nate (5/25/10)
    "Want what you have, do what you can, be who you are." - Rev. Forrest Church
  • Too much. I'm sure it was the most entertaining observation they ever made.I don't think I knew you were a teacher. Growing up I wanted to teach elem. so I could do bulletin boards and have my own gradebook. I'm a grade A dork.

    Alright, I need to get off of here and be productive before heading to bed since A is actually sleeping at a decent hour.


  • Yeah, the bulletin boards were my favorite part of teaching. If I could have just done that part I probably still would be doing it. :)
    Alex (11/14/06) and Nate (5/25/10)
    "Want what you have, do what you can, be who you are." - Rev. Forrest Church
  • So far this has been the worst!

    I was at a work conference this summer and I had been sitting in meetings and doing events all day.  Well our team won an award and I jumped up to go on stage to get it and felt a huge gush of water.  At first I thought I peed my pants (I had drank a ton of water since I was PG and we had been outside ALL day) but then I thought "oh sh!t my water just broke"!  I had to have the only sober guy in the room drive me to the hospital to get checked out.  We snuck out of the ballroom and high tailed it to the nearest hospital Yep!  I had totally peed my pants and I made him swear on his life he wouldn't tell a soul...yeah that lasted about 2 hours...and he loves to remind me all the time!

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