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Miss my girls so much

ldooldoo member
in Single Parents

When does it get easier? I'm 6 weeks into this sharing custody thing, and one week into overnights with their dad. They're just so young. They want their mommy. And I went from never leaving them until they were in bed (aside from my job) to seeing them for two days, then having to drop them off. Then two days. Then drop off. Over and over. The same cycle where I feel like we just get comfortable, then it's time to switch. I feel like all I want is a solid week with just my girls. But I know that's not happening. Even when I'm with them, I miss them.

And I feel like my nearly 4yo isn't outwardly showing much stress, but might be desperately missing me but not really saying it. How do I know if she's OK? And when does it get easier for me?

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Re: Miss my girls so much

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    dmndsr4evadmndsr4eva member

    Did you voluntarily give 50/50?  Like I said before I think the kids need routine and stability and I am not an advocate that type of schedule.  Does your ex live nearby you?

    For me it got a little easier after maybe about 6 months.  After about that point I started to realize how important it is for my son to spend time with his Dad.  And it really is what is best for him.  Then I started to enjoy having a little time off for myself.  We have 75/25 (around there).

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    ldooldoo member
    imagedmndsr4eva:

    Did you voluntarily give 50/50?  Like I said before I think the kids need routine and stability and I am not an advocate that type of schedule.  Does your ex live nearby you?

    For me it got a little easier after maybe about 6 months.  After about that point I started to realize how important it is for my son to spend time with his Dad.  And it really is what is best for him.  Then I started to enjoy having a little time off for myself.  We have 75/25 (around there).

    We live one mile apart, and I agreed to 60/40, although I hate it.

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    NancyBotwinNancyBotwin member
    It sounds like one of the hard parts is never getting into a routine. When I was young (starting at 2.5) I spent Saturday night-Wednesday morning with my mom; my dad picked me up from school on Wednesday night and I stayed with him until Saturday around 5. It sounds like the same amount of time you're sharing, but it might be a better arrangement than this on-off. It helped establish a routine for a good chunk of time...
    DD 2.9.10 DS born sleeping 12.2.12
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