Community› The Bump Message Boards› Blended Families
Blended Families
New Discussion

Joint custody and room sharing question...

OoglybearOoglybear member
in Blended Families

SS(7) and SD(9) have an every other week schedule. They definitely need their own rooms at this age. DD has been in our room since birth. SD has been asking when DD will move to her room, and I was planning on doing it in August when we move. 

I am having second thoughts b/c of our schedule. When the big kids are at BM's, she naps earlier and goes to bed earlier. When the big kids come home, she gets so excited and tries to stay awake longer to play. It pretty disruptive for her, but we obviously manage. If she shares a room with SD, one week she'll wake up with sissy there, and the next week she'll wake up alone. Should I wait til DD's a little older?

Anyone have experience with this or advice? 

ETA: We have three bedrooms, so the only options are sharing with SD or my room. 

Report Reply to Post

Re: Joint custody and room sharing question...

  • IlumineIlumine member
    Just like any other sleep type training, as long as you are consistent with her bed time routine, she will adapt.
    file:///Users/Ilumine/Desktop/Family%20Portrait%20for%20gift.jpg
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • hterry85hterry85 member
    DD and SS share (2 and 5) for now and we make it work. Usually the first night after he leaves is a little tough, just getting her to go to bed alone and we've had NORMAL 2 year old sleep issues (not wanting to go to bed/stay in bed, getting up during the night) But I don't think him coming and going has been a make or break situation.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • wwnbwwwnbw member

    My DD and SS are only 10 months apart so they have shared a room since they were 9 months and 19 months. SS is here F-W EOW and DD has never had an issue with him being there and then not being there. Now that they are older and he has been here for a while (spring break, summer, or whatever) and then leaves she says she gets lonely going to sleep with him not around but that's it.

    ETA: I would start this when your SD isn't there.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Report Reply
  • AmberMH08AmberMH08
    i haven't got to the sharing thing yet when we had 2 bedroom SD had her own and son was in with us till he was almost 2 we had huge room so it just made more sense.now that we have 3bdrms and LO is about to be born oviously she will be in with us for a yr but after that I think I may end up putting her in with my son. SD is 8 will be 9 then and she gets up 2-3hrs b4 son and stays up 1-2hrs later usually I don't get enough sleep when she is here and I don't want other kids to miss sleep too.Plus SD is rough and Im affraid she would try to pick up her sister or put her in bed with her and beat her up she punches etc in her sleep. every situation is different you just have to try it and figure out what works best :)
    image baby Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Report Reply
  • scoobyd266scoobyd266
    My DS & at least one of my SSs have shared a room together since we bought our house when they were 3. They got used to the routine of only being together every weekend very quickly. My DS misses his SBs regardless, I don't think sharing the room impacted that in any way.  
    Anniversary Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Holly_1007Holly_1007 member

    My SD has her own room and DS and the new baby will share a room for a few reasons:

    SD's room is on the main floor of the house, DS/baby room is upstairs with our bedroom.  I'm not prepared for either of my kids to be on a separate floor, especially since my DH works nights.  

    I'm not comfortable with SD sharing a room with the baby.  her sleep schedule is different, and I don't know how she would react if the baby woke up before her or in the middle of the night etc.  I know how my son sleeps, how heavy, how to get him back to seep easily, etc.  

                           
                         View Full Size Image  View Full Size Image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Report Reply
  • OoglybearOoglybear member
    imageholly71087:

    I'm not comfortable with SD sharing a room with the baby.  her sleep schedule is different, and I don't know how she would react if the baby woke up before her or in the middle of the night etc.  I know how my son sleeps, how heavy, how to get him back to seep easily, etc.  

     I am worried about their different sleep schedules as well, but SD told me she doesn't care if M wakes her up early (6am every day), etc. By that point SD was prob just being persuasive to get her way.

     Thanks for the responses, ladies. I think we'll try it out in a couple months and see how it goes... 

    Report Reply
  • Holly_1007Holly_1007 member
    imageOoglybear:
    imageholly71087:

    I'm not comfortable with SD sharing a room with the baby.  her sleep schedule is different, and I don't know how she would react if the baby woke up before her or in the middle of the night etc.  I know how my son sleeps, how heavy, how to get him back to seep easily, etc.  

     I am worried about their different sleep schedules as well, but SD told me she doesn't care if M wakes her up early (6am every day), etc. By that point SD was prob just being persuasive to get her way.

     Thanks for the responses, ladies. I think we'll try it out in a couple months and see how it goes... 

    I guess I should have added that we are having some issues/ concerns with SD's sleep in general.  we're pretty sure she is sleep deprived at BM's house (she is 6 and sleeps 12-14 hours a night at our house but only 8-10 at BM's and falls asleep on the couch as soon as she gets here from BM's) so I really wouldn't do anything to mess with that at this point for us.  

    good luck with whatever you decide!

                           
                         View Full Size Image  View Full Size Image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Report Reply
  • OoglybearOoglybear member

    imageIlumine:
    Just like any other sleep type training, as long as you are consistent with her bed time routine, she will adapt.

    Ok, but what if its not all that possible to be consistent week to week. Like, DD naturally gets tired and wants to sleep by 7pm. SD and SS both have activities (sports, scouts, etc) that go as last as 8:30pm on weeknights. DH works late frequently. Should the big kids miss their activities so that DD gets consistency? I am not being snarky at all; I am honestly asking. I've struggled with trying to juggle this the past year.

    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"