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nurrieum
member
Therapy prep
nurrieum
member
So the night SS displayed the behavior- I stayed up until DH got home (he was working a night shift and didn't get off work until 3am) and we discussed SS and therapy. We both agreed that we want to get him in ASAP. So I emailed (via facebook) BM about it that night. Since then we've seen her for two exchanges and she's been on her page a number of times- no replies- no mention.
We've decided to just proceed without her imput because this is simply something that can't be put off anymore.
Here's my dilemma:
My husband had SS enrolled in DEERS when he was born and I have paperwork where SS is claimed as a dependent. When DH was deployed (2009-2010) BM was doing more of the care-giving and so DH gave her SS's ID card etc. Since then (my DH doesn't know when and he's not organized at all- good Lord) SS has been put on medacaid. It's my understanding that BM having done this is welfare fraud.
The last time I was at our DEERS office the clerk told me that I'd need a court order if we wanted SS on DH's tricare- I'm not sure if she actually looked to see if he was enrolled already because it was very much in passing and she may have assumed he was my son. So I need to go back and call and see if SS has been enrolled because from my understanding- he can not be "taken off".
My DH just recently started paying CS to the state regarding SS being on medacaid. We have no problem with this (it's really affordable oddly) and we thought it would be better because it meant the state was acknowledging DH as the father of SS and help back him up.
Enter problem- We want to get SS into therapy as soon as possible- we're prepared to pay for this out of pocket however we would like to at least attempt to have it processed through an insurance because we're still strapped a bit tight. (However it's been decided that no matter what- this is going to happen- if we have to pay it out of pocket we will do so).
Can my DH have access to SS's medacaid information (we think it is very very unlikely that BM will provide that for us) because he's paying child support for it? We already take him to the doctor but they had that on file from BM and we didn't need it to get him care.
Does medacaid even pay for therapy like this? Would I need a referral from somewhere? I'm not sure how it works.
Also- DH will be contacting the tricare office to see if this can be straightened out but again he's not organized and we're not sure what he needs to tell them in order to fix this or figure out our next move. Would we be better contacting the welfare office?
Basically- I'm making the appointment tomorrow for whenever they have available but it it would be nice if at some point we could see if insurance will cover part of this. I'm just in really unfamiliar territory and any help would be awesome.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Therapy prep
Yeah, I really wish BM would be willing to provide the information but she can't even return the clothes she needs to for SS. She also uses these things for power- it's weird. Also- again we've mentioned to her that we need SS's medacaid info for these sessions and she hasn't even acknowledged receiving the info. We have copies of the birth certificate along with the CS order and I think that will simply be faster than trying to work with BM on this.
My mom who's a is a therapist and social worker was fairly sure that medacaid would cover it- but wasn't 100%.
Yeah, thankfully my husband is being trained for a new position at work which will help with funds (I'm a little nervous because with baby things get expensive fast) and so that's a huge relief knowing we'll that extra money soon.
I would be less inclined to believe BM was doing things in front of SS- except she has a history of inappropriate behaviors- which are so long and many nearly unbelievable that I won't go into that mess. We thought she was making a turn around which we used as an excuse to drag our feet on this. However when I look back on some of the other "disturbing play scenes" SS has done I'm just disgusted with myself for waiting this long. Several months back he "played out" a domestic violence scenario with his toys and then they "made up" again with sexual noises. My mom was advising me to get him in even before that after some other things- but shortly after his contact with his mother was limited and he stopped "playing things out".
We screwed up big time in not getting him in sooner, at this point I'm really quite concerned with what he could have been exposed too and pretty angry with myself for letting it slide. I'm hoping it is something as innocuous as seeing something on TV or even maybe just another kid doing it. There was no lead up to the behavior- he was just in the tub- did that- and then stopped and continued playing with his toys. It was bizarre.
Medicaid will cover pretty much everything though so its actually nice that he's on. Medicaid is a payor of last resort though which means private or military health insurance should trump it. Medicaid is essentially only for people who cannot afford any other health insurance and if SS is already on another health insurance then obviously there's an overlap. This same thing happened to us and we complained to Medicaid that he was already covered and bm opened a case fraudulently and they essentially said they didn't care (awesome tax dollars at work there!) if he's enrolled in the military insurance just use that one
Thank you everyone for the advice and input. We're going to look into his medacaid first because that's what is currently on file with his pediatrician etc and get that information. DH will be calling tricare office Monday and looking into what he can get worked out.
I've looked into several of the available services in our immediate area- unfortunately our first choice has no openings until Nov and even on a cancellation list we wouldn't be able to get regular appointments. The other option for our area is one our lawyer advised us against because they will not testify in court (also I've talked to several people who have utilized their services and have not had good things to say).
We have a few more options but it will be a drive (around 2 hours round trip so not too bad) and I'm making calls and looking into what's available. My mom is really familiar with the "psychological community" in our area (our first choice was one she recommended and was also at a practice familiar to me, they're just really booked up). I'm hoping when I talk to her tonight she will have some more suggestions.