May 2012 Moms

Moby's are just for Mommies...

I love my DH.

My MIL came over yesterday evening and was over bearing and suffocating as usual. DD was crying which she does when she is tired... It was late and we usually put her into her swing or nap nanny in the evening to sort of chill out by herself. She usually doesn't want to be held for a bit in the evenings. Well MIL (Grandma) doesn't understand this.

She picks up my Moby wrap and asks what it is. I tell her and she holds it up to herself and asks if she can "wear" my baby. I think my DH saw the absolute look of shock and anger that was on my face because he quickly said... "Moby's are just for Mommies"

I love him.

Re: Moby's are just for Mommies...

  • I'm now imagining a Trix are for kids type commercial for Mobys are for mommies

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  • I really want a Moby. Sigh. Stupid atty fees.
  • I dont have a moby but if I did I sure as hell wouldnt want my MIL to wear it! haha especially since everytime she holds him she does this weird thing and like smushes him up on her boobs then says "sorry, theres none there for you, it was just for your daddy!" I find it so distrubing everytime she says this haha so I can only imagine the closeness she would receive having him in a moby!

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  • imagejlsweets:
    I dont have a moby but if I did I sure as hell wouldnt want my MIL to wear it! haha especially since everytime she holds him she does this weird thing and like smushes him up on her boobs then says "sorry, theres none there for you, it was just for your daddy!" I find it so distrubing everytime she says this haha so I can only imagine the closeness she would receive having him in a moby!

    My GMIL makes a similar comment when holding DD.  She's over 90 and kind of crazy, so I try to ignore it. But also, ewwww.

    red

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  • haha yeah its just wrong..like I really don't need to know how you breastfed my husband and how he would just "gulp it down" and then she continues to make the sound effects he would make and tells me that he used to choke during her let down! Sometimes I think she thinks my son is her son!

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  • erb82erb82 member
    Why are Mobys just for mommies?  Were you angry because she asked to wear your daughter or because your daughter wanted to be in the swing and MIL wanted to hold her?
  • DrRxDrRx member

    I can see how since you know your daughter doesn't like to be held in the evenings you wouldn't want anyone to wear her.  Why couldn't DH just say that she doesn't like to be held in the evenings? 

    I don't see a problem with my family wearing my daughter.  I had my mom and sister both wear my daughter in the Moby or the Bundleboo when we all get together once a week for family dinner--and they've never "worn" a baby before Adalyn. I don't see what the big deal is with a close family member wearing the baby, as long as both the person and baby want to.

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  • Omg jlsweets i think my mil thinks my baby is her baby also :(. She keeps saying how ava is "herlive doll" i always correct her amd say ava is a growing little person. And yesterday i was at her house and ava starts screaming im usedto my mom handing her ober to me and when my mil kept failing to sooth heri finally said she needs her mom amd put my arms out and she walked away from me. My husband was pissed and said i needed to talk to her about it so it doesnt happen again. Lol that went over well. She is also always wanting to come over and says shes having withdraws and i say well its a bit overwhelming as other visitors want to meet her alao. She says she doesnt care and shes the grandparent oOMG. Sometimes i feel like she thinks of me as her surrogate. Crazy lady. Glad things are going to start changing. Im not keeping my mouth shut anymore. I carried her for 10months i got the stretch marks and i had the labor of 23 hours pushing for an hour and i pushed out all 9lbs and 1oz of her and felt every stitch i got for the huge tear she gave me. My mil did not :(
  • I guess I have a different relationship with my mil I find it sweet when she asks how our boys are.  She means my three sons and my dh, to be fair dh was her boy first.  And I'm glad she loves my kids so much.  I'd let others wear my boys, my best friend has worn my middle baby a handful of times again I'm glad she loves my kids that much.
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  • Totally sympathize with the OP, my MIL is like this also!

    It's one thing for a MIL to be excited about her grandbabies, but it crosses a line when she puts her own desire to bond with the baby above what we as parents feel is best for our child. In my case my MIL came to stay with us for DS's first month because DH had to travel for work, and we needed her help. She's very sweet, but this was a case of too much of a good thing. She really got in the way of precious early bonding time between me and my son, and also interfered with our getting BF established. She would take him from me "so I could get some rest," and promise to bring him to me when he was hungry, which was NEVER, because every time he stirred or rooted she would just shush him to sleep and she was so proud of herself! We kept on trying to explain to her about hunger cues, about him needing to eat every 3 hours, about me getting engorged, but NONE of that was more important than her desire to have him sleeping in her arms for literally hours on end. One time I set him down in the bouncer for just a moment, taking a (burp) break from feeding him, and she offers to take him so I say, sure, he needs to burp, and then off she goes with him! And not only does she not burp him, she starts to shush him, but he's still hungry and will have none of it. I actually had to chase her around the kitchen island to get her to give him back to me! And she still wouldn't give him back so I had to spell it out for her, that he had only emptied one breast and still had to nurse on the other side, and boy did I really not want to talk about my breasts with her! I nearly had to pry him out of her hands. And of course he wasn't back up to birth weight at his 2nd week appointment because of incidents like this, but did she get it? Nooooo.

  • While you may have other issues with your MIL, I don't see anything inappropriate about asking to wear your baby in a moby wrap or other carrier. I don't have a mother in law (she died about 6 months before our wedding) but I am just glad to give my arms a rest and will happily pass LO around to other friends and family. Be glad that she wants to be involved and give a hand!
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