Natural Birth

Natural birth nerves

I have wanted to have a natural drug free child birth since I was a teenager.  We are expecting our first in September and Im starting to get nervous, wondering if I will be able to tolerate it.  I think I have a higher pain tolerance, but like I said I'm starting to doubt myself.  We are having our birth at a hospital without a midwife or doula.  My husband and mother are my support system (who did natural with all her kids). Any words of wisdom or advice would be greatly appreciated!  Thanks!

Re: Natural birth nerves

  • kdjuddkdjudd member
    The best thing you can do is change your anxiety about the birth to excitement. Sure, giving birth is painful, but honestly it is the best day of your life! I absolutely hated begin pregnant, but I'm jealous of the mom's who are still expecting. I wish I could experience that day again. There is just something so special about the excitement and meeting your child for the first time. It is worth all the pain and all the hard work. Just focus on the end result rather than the work it takes to get there! You can do it!
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  • If you have not already, check out Ina May Gaskins book: Ina Mays Guide to Childbirth. Even if you dont read the whole thing, the first part is about positive birth stories of natural birth. There are so many "birth horror stories" that we forget to focus on the positive ones.

    Sometimes it is just nice to be reminded that our female bodies were made to do this, though it takes some effort. (Yes, there can be medical reasons for intervention.) But for the high percentage of women it is more than possible. Also, I love thinking about the fact that there are thousands of women in the world going through the exact same thing that I am at the same time.

    My mom really liked focusing on the fact that there are only so many contractions until you see the baby. It is different with each person. However, each contraction she had, she would remind herself that that particular contraction was never coming back. 

    Lilypie - (qptF)


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  • For me, it was less about pain tolerance than having the skills to cope with contractions.  Like knowing how to relax through the contractions and DH having some methods of helping me do so (I ended up being a moaner, which I wasn't expecting, and relying on rhythmic movement).  Taking a class is one way to learn these, but if you cannot take a class, doing some research and reading about positive birth stores (I second Ina May's book that PP suggested) are very useful.
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  • I was so nervous too! When I went into labor, my water broke and I was having mild period like contractions at first...walking helped me get through those. Just remember that each contractions WILL come to an end...having my husband count the contractions and time them really helped me focus on that rather than the fact that I was in labor for 18 hours...like another poster wrote- focus on each contraction as it comes...knowing that it will end and you will get a little break to catch your breath is the best knowledge. Before you know it, you will be meeting your amazing little baby! Also, I would make sure your husband knows to tell the hospital staff to NOT offer you any drugs, it can be discouraging when every nurse entering your room asks you if you want an epidural. Also, I have never met a woman who went natural that regretted it...all the horror birth stories you hear involve drugs and intervention. GOOD LUCK! You can do this and you will be so proud of yourself!
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  • Don't watch shows about birth! A Baby Story for one, just taught me that it was going to hurt and that I was going to scream. When I went into labor with my son, I fully intended on walking into the hospital and screaming "give me an epidural!" and I did have one with him, but not until I was 9 cms. I ended up with a horrible recovery, I attribute a lot of it to having an epidural. This time around, I'm 25 weeks pregnant and we are seeing a midwife and planning a waterbirth at home. I watched the documentary "The Business of Being Born" and I still watch it every now and then, just to feel a rush of "I can do this!". The way I see it, is that every contraction brings you closer to the end. Yes, it hurts, but definitely you can do it! Woman have been doing this for centuries, and the thing I'm looking forward to most is holding this baby for the first time and that rush of adrenaline and being able to say "I did it!".

     You can do it! :)

  • I HIGHLY recommend the hypnobabies home study course...you need to change your mindset from anxious about "pain" to excitement about meeting your baby! :)  I had a very intense birth (2 days of back labor) but got through it using the relaxation tools I got from hypnobabies. Your mind is very powerful - believe you can do it and deserve to have a wonderful birthing! My midwife said to me "you can do ANYTHING for a minute" - believe in yourself, you CAN do it!  :)
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  • KiedisKiedis member

    I was nervous, too. I can't imagine not being nervous about it!

    I educated myself, read a lot (found the Bradley Method books really helpful), and tried to really understand the benefits of no meds, and the downsides of the interventions. By the end it seemed like the easier option to go natural and so much less risky. I also have a horrible fear of needles, so a needle in the back probably terrified me more than anything!

    My naturopath told me that during her labour she just kept thinking that no matter what happened, the baby was coming out one way or another. There was no option to not move forward, it's eventually going to be over. 

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  • Thanks ladies! You provided some great advice and encouragement.  Prior to posting I was planning on taking a birth class, but since I have actually begun it.  Between the class and your comments I feel much better!  Thanks again!
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