Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: I really don't want one... =(
I totally understand not wanting a c section, I did not either.
However, you need to trust your MD on this one. I would not mess around with HPV and the risk to your baby. Get a second medical opinion if you don't feel your OB is making a wise decision, I would not trust non medical people on the internet for this purpose.
I do have to ask, though..is there concern about your partners fidelity? How could you have gotten HPV recently?
As for what others say, I would just say "there are some medical issues I am having and my doctor recommends c-section". Enough said.
Best of luck to you!
DS born via unplanned C-section at 40w6d
You tell other people you and your OB feel c-section is the best choice for you and your baby. That's all anyone needs to know.
I was wondering that, as well.
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
What's most important is getting your baby here as safely as possible. Don't take chances with this-imagine how you'd feel if your baby experienced a preventable, serious illness because you didn't want a CS.
In terms of what to say if people ask, simply say your doctor recommended a CS. Or ask them why they want to know-it's really no one else's business anyway.
My OB mentioned possibility of Csection at my second to last appt. Baby was not progressing at all even though I was having contractions. My body wasn't progressing either. I was devastated. No matter what anyone else told me I didn;t care I just really didn't want a Csection. Now since having one I was really ok with it and I am having a RCS and I am really ok with that too. I don't think anyone can make you feel better about a csection before you have it. You just kinda accept it after the fact.
I wouldn't mess around with your baby getting anything and if the doc says csection I would probably listen.
Thank you so much, everyone, for your support. I've just been really devastated about it. When I found out and told my husband, it did cause a huge fight. Neither of us had ever had a cold sore or anything like that before. My doctor said it was likely from oral, and he simply didn't know he had the virus. (You can have it without ever having symptoms.) He said he was leaving and wanted a dna test on the baby, etc, etc, ... which made everything even more devastating. I didn't cheat and I firmly believe he didn't either. Later that day he ended up saying that he'd rather be a fool than an a$$hole and we'd get through it together.
We told our parents what's going on. We've been telling everyone else that the baby and I are fine, just minor complications, but my doctor insists it's for the best. It's just really hard not being able to talk to people about it because it makes me feel more alone.
I go in for a c-section Friday morning. Thank you to everyone for helping me understand that it's the right thing to do. I'm just mourning the loss of the birth I had planned, which is hard; but it's safer. I'd rather mourn this than a complication with my son.
0_0
Oh my goodness. I'm so sorry your DH reacted that way. If it were me, I'd be much more upset about that then mourning the birth I had planned. I'm sure both are really tough. Please take care of yourself and good luck with your c-section. It's not nearly as bad once you've gone through it. Healthy baby and mom are truly the most important things, and I'm sure you realize that.
Did you explain to him that hsv-1 is not the same as "genital warts" and is a different virus? Hsv-1 normally shows up as cold sores or fever blisters. Most people become infected in preschool and can carry it symptom free for decades. The virus can remain dormant your entire life before showing any symptoms, often times brought on by stress. It can be spread by sharing a cup with someone who has the virus.
While the "sores" normally show up on the lips, they can also show up on the face, arms, eyeball (painful and where dh has gotten them), and on the genitals.
HPV can also be spread without any sexual contact. Just an FYI.
BFP#1 Kaitlyn 11-17-04
BFP #2 Matthew pPROM 23w5d 06-03-07, b/33 weeks 8-6-07, d/10-15-07 SIDS,
BFP #3 m/c 8 weeks 2/20/09, BFP #4 m/c no hb 6w4d, m/c 9w4d, D&C 11w2d, BFP #5 C/P 12/18/09 after BFP- 9dpo
BFP #6 Samantha- 11-9-10
BFP #7 4/20/12 21 DPO beta: 2382 29 DPO beta: 23000! HB 6w2d 116 bpm due Christmas day!
This Momma's Journey
~Today I am pregnant and I love my baby~