Do any of you ladies worry about being a mother?

MRSVELA07 · June 2012

I've been told that this is a common feeling...wondering "Will I be a good mother?" After seeing my baby's heartbeat yesterday I realized that it's really happening!!! I had a really good upbringing. Raised by a single mother who showed tough but unconditional love I just hope I can be half the mother my mom was and still is to me. Since my mother worked two demanding careers, working for the City of LA and Army Reserves, I spent a lot of time with my Grandmother and my very close aunt. With that being said I have been influenced by 3 different women, 2 of which were raised by an amazing God fearing woman. I really want my child to have the same upbringing but times have changed. At times there's no doubt in my mind that I'll be a good mother but then there are other times I feel a little intimidated by the thought!

Has anyone else felt the same way or feels the same way?

sekura · June 2012

I definitely worry about it. My mother was horrible; I look at her example as what NOT to do--she was mean and manipulative, and had no life of her own. I realize now that it was her own failings and insecurities that were the problem and had little to do with me, but that definitely affected how I grew up.

But I think the best thing you can do is to share yourself with your child, be loving and also give space, and recognize your own shortcomings and try to overcome them. There is no such thing as a perfect mother; just make a conscious effort to try to be good.

holly321 · June 2012

I used to before DD. Instict takes over instantly, and everything seems so natural ( most of the time at least.)

I think, if you want to be a good mother, than you will be a good mother. If you know what I mean.

Kie310 · June 2012

Even to this day & my son is 2. I question myself almost daily if I'm making the right choices in raising my child (soon to be children)

ATLdesi · June 2012

Yes, I do wonder about this too. I feel fortunate in that I was raised by a family stable in every way (financially, emotionally, socially, etc.) but it was a young immigrant family that still retained a lot of the ways of child-rearing, discipline, hierarchy of our heritage. My DH and I were both born and raised in the U.S. and obviously are influenced so much by our upbringings, but will likely make a lot of different choices in how we raise our kids. I'm curious and sometimes anxious about this experience. It'll be interesting to see it all pan out

renc9828 · June 2012

Before DS, yes. Now I worry about being a good mother to two. Giving both the attention they need. Figuring out how to do right by both of them.

babysabba · June 2012

YES! Sometimes I worry that my decision to have a child was too impulsive-- like I have no idea what I signed up for. There is a human life inside me who will one day ccall me mother. That name means so much to me. I am hoping I can live up to it!

pwyckhouse · June 2012

Every once in a while I will think about it, but its totally normal. This is my first so it is going to be a huge life change. Big Smile But a good change!

MelissaRae1525 · June 2012

I think everyone does, and if you don't, you're underestimating the responsibility we have/will have as mothers. I worry mostly about SO and I agreeing on parenting choices and discipline, but so far in hypothetical situations we've agreed.

mistresscox · June 2012

I STILL worry about being a good mother LOL! It's something that doesn't just "happen"-you have to choose to be a good mother every day that you wake up. Some days that choice is easy and fun, and sometimes that decision really sucks. However it is the most rewarding thing you will ever do. And just remember, no matter what it looks like, there is no such thing as the "perfect parent". The person that looks like all of her children are well dressed and perfectly behaved in the grocery store may have been rocking in the corner crying yesterday because it was just "one of those days". There are ups and downs and the only thing you can do is give your best and remember that you are their ultimate role model.

The fact that you are worrying about it already is a good sign.

BLPL101 · June 2012

I think it's totally normal! It's a huge responsibility!

CutieBean79 · June 2012

Yea, and you only worry more once they are here. My philosophy is to educate myself, be consistent, do the best I know how to do, and above all, love unconditionally.

this decaf life · June 2012

I worry very little about it!

My mom always told me "babies bounce" and I know there are millions of kids being brought up in all sorts of households that come out just fine so I have all confidence that DH & I won't screw up too much!

My sister and I are 100% opposites - freakishly so - so I also believe that a lot of the way you grow up doesn't actually affect who you become as an adult. My child will know all sorts of love (and fairly strict rules - because neither my mom nor I take any crap when it comes down to the rules) and I know I'm going to set LO up the best way I know how and that's all I can do!

Good luck though! Remember that seriously if you do the best you know how to do there will never be any doubt that at least you tried your hardest!

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