Do you know what philosophy of birth/child care this is?

lil fox · June 2012

We are not telling people until the 2nd trimester. Problem is, that is the VERY first day of school and both hubby and I are teachers, so I'm trying to get in a lot of reading in before school starts. My hubby's cousins (of which one did at home births and another used a midwife but had to do hospital, so I'm feeling like that you all would probably know what sort of books they were reading) participate in a form of child rearing in which the child does not watch TV, all toys are natural materials (not plastic), and they use this really long piece of fabric to keep their infants close to them. It feels like these things all seem like a more natural way of raising children and since this is about natural birth, I thought maybe this post wouldn't be too misplaced and seem to get me the answers best? (I would ask the cousins but that would out me WAY too early.) I have no idea what any of this is called and was wondering if anyone could help me out with either book titles or at least names for these things.

AmyRI · June 2012

Attachment Parenting. There's a whole board for it, too. Congrats!

lil fox · June 2012

thank you so much. i am the first of my pals to have a baby so I'm flying blind right now.

amandaleigh1 · June 2012

A lot of what you describe would is in my plans for how I want to parent, and I would say that I will not be practicing most of what attachment parenting preaches. Just saying. You can cloth diaper and not have a tv and still not follow dr. Sears on most things of substance. The Eco friendly natural stuff is not really tied to a parenting style per se.

tokenhoser · June 2012

amandaleigh1:
A lot of what you describe would is in my plans for how I want to parent, and I would say that I will not be practicing most of what attachment parenting preaches. Just saying. You can cloth diaper and not have a tv and still not follow dr. Sears on most things of substance. The Eco friendly natural stuff is not really tied to a parenting style per se.

You can also Attachment Parent and sort of think Dr. Sears is a douche.

I'm pretty AP, but I just don't buy what he's selling.

AndromedaEclipse · June 2012

I would look into both Montessori and AP. They're not mutually exclusive, though some parts are incompatible.

julyjennifer · June 2012

The no-TV and no-plastic sounds like Waldorf to me. Babywearing is for everyone! But maybe attachment parenting is their philosophy. You could look up Dr. Sears' books and website as a starting place.

Celyn · June 2012

No plastic and no TV are something that strict Waldorf parents do (our local school even makes parents sign a promise not to allow them at home). Lots of moms in the Holistic Moms Network do something similar as well. No plastic or TV are not part of the 8 principles of Attachment Parenting, which are C&Ped from Attachment Parenting International:

Prepare for Pregnancy, Birth, and Parenting

Become emotionally and physically prepared for pregnancy and birth. Research available options for healthcare providers and birthing environments, and become informed about routine newborn care. Continuously educate yourself about developmental stages of childhood, setting realistic expectations and remaining flexible.

Feed with Love and Respect

Breastfeeding is the optimal way to satisfy an infant's nutritional and emotional needs. "Bottle Nursing" adapts breastfeeding behaviors to bottle-feeding to help initiate a secure attachment. Follow the feeding cues for both infants and children, encouraging them to eat when they are hungry and stop when they are full. Offer healthy food choices and model healthy eating behavior.

Respond with Sensitivity

Build the foundation of trust and empathy beginning in infancy. Tune in to what your child is communicating to you, then respond consistently and appropriately. Babies cannot be expected to self-soothe, they need calm, loving, empathetic parents to help them learn to regulate their emotions. Respond sensitively to a child who is hurting or expressing strong emotion, and share in their joy.

Use Nurturing Touch

Touch meets a baby's needs for physical contact, affection, security, stimulation, and movement. Skin-to-skin contact is especially effective, such as during breastfeeding, bathing, or massage. Carrying or babywearing also meets this need while on the go. Hugs, snuggling, back rubs, massage, and physical play help meet this need in older children.

Ensure Safe Sleep, Physically and Emotionally

Babies and children have needs at night just as they do during the day; from hunger, loneliness, and fear, to feeling too hot or too cold. They rely on parents to soothe them and help them regulate their intense emotions. Sleep training techniques can have detrimental physiological and psychological effects. Safe co-sleeping has benefits to both babies and parents.

Provide Consistent and Loving Care

Babies and young children have an intense need for the physical presence of a consistent, loving, responsive caregiver: ideally a parent. If it becomes necessary, choose an alternate caregiver who has formed a bond with the child and who cares for him in a way that strengthens the attachment relationship. Keep schedules flexible, and minimize stress and fear during short separations.

Practice Positive Discipline

Positive discipline helps a child develop a conscience guided by his own internal discipline and compassion for others. Discipline that is empathetic, loving, and respectful strengthens the connection between parent and child. Rather than reacting to behavior, discover the needs leading to the behavior. Communicate and craft solutions together while keeping everyone's dignity intact.

Strive for Balance in Personal and Family Life

It is easier to be emotionally responsive when you feel in balance. Create a support network, set realistic goals, put people before things, and don't be afraid to say "no". Recognize individual needs within the family and meet them to the greatest extent possible without compromising your physical and emotional health. Be creative, have fun with parenting, and take time to care for yourself.

amandaleigh1 · June 2012

tokenhoser:
amandaleigh1:
A lot of what you describe would is in my plans for how I want to parent, and I would say that I will not be practicing most of what attachment parenting preaches. Just saying. You can cloth diaper and not have a tv and still not follow dr. Sears on most things of substance. The Eco friendly natural stuff is not really tied to a parenting style per se.
You can also Attachment Parent and sort of think Dr. Sears is a douche.
I'm pretty AP, but I just don't buy what he's selling.

MangomamaFL · June 2012

julyjennifer:
The no-TV and no-plastic sounds like Waldorf to me. Babywearing is for everyone! But maybe attachment parenting is their philosophy. You could look up Dr. Sears' books and website as a starting place.

https://www.askdrsears.com

JoyfulW&M · June 2012

This is what I do, it is attachment parenting and gentle discipline/parenting.

I advise Ina Mae Gaskin books. and any book that looks on birth as a purely natural and normal part of a woman's life that sometimes can have problems arise, rather then a condition that sometimes works itself out without assistance. I can't think of anymore title or authors but here is a good blog that has a list of natural birthing books.

Stand and Deliver