When did you ladies tell your family and close friends (if you did yet)

caly krissy · June 2012

I know this question probably gets discussed a million times on here but I am not sure when to tell my sister, close friends and parents. This is the first grandkid for my parents and I think they want this just as bad as me. lol. We do not live in the same place but I am going home for a visit the end of July/ early August which puts me right before my third trim (I think it is August 18th it starts and when it is more safe to tell people).

I will be seeing my sister and some friends before this though and I am going to have to tell them the news (I am (well... was ) a huge wine-o so they will know something is up).

Just looking for other peoples opinions! So excited!

teachingirl28 · June 2012

I'm in the minority on this, I'm sure, but I told everyone right away. And I do mean everyone - it's on facebook, my whole family knows, etc.

I just have faith that nothing is wrong and even if it is, I'll be willing to talk about it.

pamiva1 · June 2012

I told one very close friend right away. We told our parents, siblings and close family right after our first ultrasound (around 6 weeks). I'm still telling everyone else as we see them. It's a personal decision. I've had several miscarriages before and even when I had not originally told some friends, it came up anyways after the fact so I see no harm in telling those that you're close to. They should be part of this happy time! Good luck

jobiann · June 2012

You should tell when you are comfortable. I've had two losses so we are not telling the general population until at least 14 weeks. We told our immediate family only after our second very successful u/s at 9 weeks. And honestly, I probably won't put it on FB until we find out the gender.

I kind of wanna puke when people announce when they are 4 or 5 weeks pregnant...that's just too early...but it is a personal decision for everyone. It's such a special time between a husband and wife to share that time together with such an important secret. Because as soon as you tell everyone...it's a million questions (are you going to find out the sex, are you going natural or medicated birth, are you breast feeding, etc) and a million offers of the perfect advice. It gets old and I'm enjoying the time right now of just keeping it on the down-low!

JuliaLovesCarson · June 2012

It's up to you. Some people wait to go public because of how hard it would be explaining over and over again in the event of a miscarriage when people ask how the pregnancy is going. THAT is not something I'd be comfortable posting (or even reading) on facebook.

We told our folks/siblings at 8 weeks (on Mother's Day when we had them all together). We told close friends around 10-12 weeks and went public at 13 (the day after my OB found a strong heartbeat and said we were out of hot water).

Do you think your sister will have a hard time keeping it from your parents? We told them all at the same time because I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but I get why it would make sense to go ahead and tell your sister first. The four weeks that we knew and told no one were tough! Waiting until 3rd tri would've been impossible. GL!

mrsgabus · June 2012

my dh told anyone who would listen at 5 weeks. I told my best friend abd my parents around the same time. I gad two ultrasounds and heard the heartbeat at 10 weeks. I annouced it to by brother at 12 weeks

mishka29 · June 2012

The way I'm thinking about it is this...If something happens to this pregnancy will I tell certain people about it after the fact. If yes, then I'm okay to tell them now. So far I have told my mom and one friend at work, who is also pregnant. There is another friend I want to tell but everytime I think about telling I just can't bring myself to do it. I guess for now I just want to keep it to myself, mostly. My first appointment isn't until week 11 and even then I'm not sure when I will scheduled for my first u/s. Ugh, the waiting is not fun!

happy_un-bride · June 2012

We told my parents and DHs parents the night we got the BFP. Largely because my MIL and I were going out shopping and dining the next day.

Will probably hold off on siblings until after I've been to doctor. And will tell the rest of the world on a need to know basis.

expectingMom2013 · June 2012

We told our parents and siblings at about 6 weeks when we found out. Then we waited unti 11 weeks to tell everyone else.

momofmanyinthemitten · June 2012

With #1, we told close family at 8 weeks and the general public at 12. With #2, we miscarried at 7 weeks. DH had told his coworker, but that was the only one we had told. This time around, we had to tell our parents at 6.5 weeks because I had to explain why I was the only not painting in our new house. We will wait until at least our first u/s to tell other family members, and probably 12 weeks for the general public.

Brummy14 · June 2012

We told immediate family (parents, siblings only) --- well, immediately. We'd been struggling with IF for a while, and they had been well-aware of every step of that process, so this was no different.

We JUST told 3 couples that we consider our closest friends last night, actually -- and will be waiting a few more weeks before we tell extended family and friends. Basically, the rule of thumb we've used at this point is (and you'll hear this more than once) -- would we want them to know about a potential m/c if god-forbid something happens at this point? And if we're okay with that -- knowing we'd certainly need a support system to get through it -- then, yes, we're now comfortable telling them. And, I'm telling my boss on Monday -- he's actually located overseas and completely oblivious to all of this, but the bump (thanks, twins, lol) is getting pretty hard to hide, already, and I'd rather him hear it from me directly than from anyone else speculating!

Beyond that -- assuming we do the NT scan (still up in the air -- will be calling the ins co tomorrow to see if it's covered), that might be the point at which we begin considering mentioning it on FB, etc. But, we'll see. We may just wait on the whole FB thing for a while.

naa855 · June 2012

we've told DH's parents, but only because we're moving and his mother could come see us before we move. i have an u/s at the end of this week, and i want to at least wait until after that to tell my family, but the plan is to tell my family at a family picnic in july when i'll be 11 weeks. i'm anxious and a very private person though, so if something was wrong i'd rather not share. but if everything looks good next week for my u/s, i might crack and tell them earlier

i don't know how you'd wait until you were early 3rd trimester though! you have more willpower than i do!

Kingston54 · June 2012

Immediate family - about a week after we found out (so 6 weeks). Then we started telling very close friends around 7-8 weeks. Other friends and family were told after the ultra sound (between weeks 8 and 9). Now we are just telling if it comes up (11 weeks).

pitterpatter129 · June 2012

We told the world with LO at 6 weeks! We were so excited, we didn't care it was waaayy early. We had already had an ultrasound and seen a heartbeat though. I put a poem in a frame for both grandparents.

This one we were going to wait until after 12 weeks, but since we'll see our entire family on both sides on July 4th, we decided to go ahead and spill the beans then (I'll be about 8 weeks.) We won't have even had a doctor's appt yet! Eek! I might change my mind before then, but that's the plan. This time we are putting a cute shirt on DS and letting him walk around and seeing who notices.

shipsshoessealingwax · June 2012

We told parents & BIL at 6.5wks, I told my best friend at 7wks, & we will tell DH's grandparents (who live w/ in-laws) after the first u/s at 8wks. I'm planning to wait on telling extended family & other friends until 12wks but if things look really amazing at the u/s then that might change. I won't see any family until Thanksgiving but by then I'll have a huge bump - I could never wait that long!!

cherie_2185 · June 2012

We told our parents and siblings the night that we found out, and my fiance posted it on facebook on father's day (two days later).

Personally, I would have preferred to wait to announce widely until we had at least one prenatal appointment, but I know my fiance, and he cannot keep a secret about big news like that. He was bursting to tell all his friends so they could share in his excitement and joy, and doesn't see any benefit in waiting to announce. I let him have his way on that. It was more important to him to not have to keep it a secret, than it was to me to have to keep it a secret (if that makes sense).

So I guess its really down to a personal choice between you and your DH/DF.

BLPL101 · June 2012

I told my parents and DH's parents at 5 weeks. I told my brother & BIL at 7 weeks. I told a few close friends on Friday so 10 weeks. No one else knows. I was bleeding so I didn't know how it would turn out. I probably would have told my friends a lot earlier if I hadn't been bleeding.

leafslowe · June 2012

We are planning on telling our parents at around 10 weeks, then friends sometime after that. It certainly wont be announced over facebook until all the important people we want to tell know first!!

Kate504 · June 2012

We have told some people. Just close friends and family, I haven't told my parents because we want to do it in person. We are holding out telling his parents for a while because his mom likes facebook and has a big mouth.

I'd prefer to wait to put it on facebook for a while and hope that his mom would respect that decision, but in case she will not we are waiting to tell them.

nallsl · June 2012

We are waiting until we can get both sets of grandparents together. If one finds out before the other, it will be a huge headache. Fortunately, my hubby's b-day is in 6 weeks. This will put me around 11 weeks, so we plan to break the news then. We are going to say a prayer prior to lunch and mention it during the prayer.

NechamaChayim · June 2012

I've told my Rabbi and I told my close cousin because I'm nervous and I wanted her to know. I don't plan to tell anyone else until 12 - 14 weeks, not even my mother. Last time we told my in-laws at 10 weeks because my DH couldn't keep it a secret any longer and the very next day had to tell them they were not going to have their first grandchild. We're not doing that again.

CutieBean79 · June 2012

With DD we told our close family right away. With this one, we happen to have them all together on July 14, so we will tell them then. I see my parents everyday so it's hard for me & I'm pretty sure my mom is gonna kill me when she finds out I've kept this from her. I'll be around 7 weeks when we tell them.

rbrooks2013 · June 2012

ClaryPax:
jobiann:
You should tell when you are comfortable. I've had two losses so we are not telling the general population until at least 14 weeks. We told our immediate family only after our second very successful u/s at 9 weeks. And honestly, I probably won't put it on FB until we find out the gender.
I kind of wanna puke when people announce when they are 4 or 5 weeks pregnant...that's just too early...but it is a personal decision for everyone. It's such a special time between a husband and wife to share that time together with such an important secret. Because as soon as you tell everyone...it's a million questions (are you going to find out the sex, are you going natural or medicated birth, are you breast feeding, etc) and a million offers of the perfect advice. It gets old and I'm enjoying the time right now of just keeping it on the down-low!
This. I'm 12 weeks, and only mom knows because she guessed. I don't feel like telling anyone, but also don't want to wait until its obvious.

for me, its after the 12 week appt with the doc and u/s is done.. told my parents and DHs parents right away (at 5 weeks though).. for friends, relatives, etc after 12 weeks...

derika13 · June 2012

We told our parents the day the doctor confirmed the pregnancy and we waited till our 12week u/s to share with everyone else! It's totally your decision! Good luck! I'm sure you'll do what's right for you

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