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1st Trimester
PeonyPumps
member
Also, a more serious question about siblings
PeonyPumps
member
I don't think it hit me until just now, but I just realized my son is going to have a sibling. Lol. No, but really, I've never had a good relationship with my sister, it has always been a struggle to most times just remain civil. We are on better terms now, but it is still sometimes tense at best. Does anyone else have the irrational fear that their children are going to hate each other? I know you can't make them like each other, but other than having both of them cry at once and not knowing who to go to first, this is my biggest mama of two fear.
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Re: Also, a more serious question about siblings
It's easy. Go to the kid you like the most first
Let your son be involved with the baby...it will be fine. My boys are 2 years apart and are best friends
1/12/13 DD was born
4/9/16 DS was born
9/17 CP
6/23/18 BFP EDD 3/4/19
That is exactly why I want like 3-5 children, so they have a better option of at least having one good sibling friend.
BFP 11/09 - DD 7/10 - BFP 8/11 - M/C 9/11 - BFP 6/12 - DD - 2/13
Well I thought I was one and done, and then I got a surprise BFP. I was a-okay with DS not having any siblings, but now that he's going to have one, I'm excited for him. We talk about the baby, and he's excited and always asking about the baby. I see him play with babies and young toddlers, and he's great with them. I see my cousin's son (who is 5 years older than DS) play with DS, and they play great together.
Nothing can be guaranteed, but I feel like we have a good relationship between the two in the works, and that we have the resources necessary to make sure that lasts over the years. I'm sure it helps that DH and his sister (4 years apart) have a good relationship, and I have a good relationship with my brother and sisters (8 and 9 years apart from me)
Oh and if they're both crying, then pull them both into your lap and cuddle them both. My MIL always has at least two kids in her lap during the holidays, because my son and nephew absolutely cannot not be her lap.
I worry about it, too. I have one sibling, a brother 18 months younger than me. We're basically estranged. We are complete opposites, and despite trying to extend an olive branch, we're not talking.
While I don't think it's necessarily anything my parents did or didn't do, I think our kids will (hopefully) get along better because of DH and I.
My blog
That's a hard one. I almost never got along with my sister in our earlier years, but after one year of living separately (I guess when I was somewhere around 14 and my sister was somewhere around 12, roughly) we got along perfectly and it's been that way ever since. I also have a half-brother who is 14 years older, so we never had much in the way of a relationship when I was younger, but we get along very well now (though he is very independent and we don't see each other often). If my DH gets on board with it, I'd almost certainly opt for a second child/a sibling for my first. On the other hand, DH comes from a larger family--he has 4 sisters and 2 brothers--and there are at least a couple that he really does not care for and probably would not maintain any relationship with if it weren't for the fact that they both show up for family holidays. Out of the 6 I'd say he's really only remotely close to one of them.
There are no guarantees, positive or negative, but in my opinion there is a lot to be said in favor of having a constant companion. There have been times where I don't know how I would have gotten by without my sister, even though we didn't start out on the right foot. I've gone to her with problems that I didn't feel ready/comfortable going to my mother with, and so forth.
BFP #1:10/31/10 DS born 6/22/11BFP #3:4/24/12 DD born 12/31/12