I hate change

MrsPandolph · June 2012

Dilemma: my OB who delivered my DD is retiring in a week... I need a first-time pre-natal checkup... my next choice of OB in the same practice is not taking new patients but I left her a voicemail anyway praying she will return my call with an appointment time.

I prefer a female doctor but the only other two available are male... so do I suck it up and just take a male doc to stay at the same practice (where I know I will be cared for greatly) or do I stay stubborn and go to a whole new market of OB's just so I don't feel uncomfortable showing my V to a man?

What would you do?

MadeOfAwesome · June 2012

I thought I was going to be super uncomfortable seeing a male doctor, but a coworker/friend highly recommended him. I started seeing him 5 years ago and I seriously love him. I've actually been more comfortable with him than I have with all of the female doctors I've seen.

It's definitely a personal preference though. If you really love the practice, I would just try it out with one of the male doctors. If it's too uncomfortable for you, then you can look for a new one.

2u2wow · June 2012

personally i DO NOT feel comfortable with a male Dr. not really sure why...i just don't like the thought of it!

if i were you i'd switch to find a female Dr if there are any!

nallsl · June 2012

I personally don't care either way, but my husband insists on me having a female. He does have a good point; females generally have much smaller hands. LOL

Mommyluv384 · June 2012

I go to a male doctor he is wonderful.

If I were you, I would try the new male doctor for the first appt to see if you like him and how you feel and take it from there, if you feel uncomfortable after meeting him then change doctors office

PeonyPumps · June 2012

That sucks that your Ob is no longer going to be seeing patients. If you are more comfortable with a female then I'd try to look at another practice if possible to see a female.

MadeOfAwesome · June 2012

nallsl:
I personally don't care either way, but my husband insists on me having a female. He does have a good point; females generally have much smaller hands. LOL

I would throat punch my husband if he ever tried to tell me that I couldn't see the doctor of my choice. FTN.

sbevmc09 · June 2012

I don't have a problem with a male OB so if I liked the practice I'd definitely be staying. I think it's hard to find exceptional practices so if you have one, I'd keep it! However, if you're too uncomfortable, or if you just want to look into other options, it never hurts to shop around and see what's out there! You have plenty of time until delivery and maybe you'll find something even better.

Mrs.DeliaMarieP · June 2012

I have a male OB, and it doesn't make me the least bit uncomfortable. If you like the practice, and know that they will treat you well and are good physicians, I think it's better to stick with the devil you know than the devil you don't.

BLPL101 · June 2012

I have no choice and have to see a male OB and I was super nervous about it, but it's no big deal at all. I feel silly for even worrying about it now!

Kie310 · June 2012

Try out the male doc. See what you think.

Before I had my son I was "female only". The practice I use has 2 female and 4 male docs. It worked out that I ended up always seeing this one male doctor with my son. As luck would have it, he was the one the had me induced & was on call all weekend & performed the c/s. I loved him. He just retired a couple of months ago.

One of the other male doctors has taken over his "shifts" of sorts, so I am seeing him now as my "regular" baby doctor. I don't even care.

Now, for my annuals I still want a female, and I see the NP (they have 2 on staff), but when it comes to baby stuff... Umm, I'm dressed at every appointment and when he sees my vag there is (hopefully) going to be a baby trying to get out of it and honestly I didn't give a sh*t with my first and long as the job got done.

But as always, to each their own!

My husband has Zero say in who my OB/GYN is... it isn't his body being poked and proded yearly!

mrssmw · June 2012

Would you rather have a male ob-gyn from a practice that cares about your wellbeing and will look after you or risk going to a female obgyn that doesn't? If it REALLY makes you feel uncomfortable then you should change.

mest1215 · June 2012

Its totally your choice and whatever you decide is really up to YOU! My doc was in a practice, so from time to time i'd have to see the men in the practice, and like you said, i just never really felt comfortable with them. For me it came down what was best for me and my baby, my OB left the practice and went out on her own after my last baby was born. So my decision was to follow her. I just know how I am, and i would be more likley to open up and share whats going on with my pregnancy with her as my OB, than with a new doctor (I tend to be pretty shy, even with a doctor, when its someon i dont know. I get real quiet and feel stupid speaking up about something if i think 'well its prob no big deal'). But its totally up to you, if you think you can be open and honest with a man, then go for it. if you dont...start asking friends who they have for an ob if they really like him/her. good luck

mrsgabus · June 2012

I had the same Male OB from age 14 to 23. He was My Ob for ds1 and seriously he was an awesome Guy However I was uncomfortable everytime I had to have a physical. When I moved away (500 Miles) I found out that I was pregnant and had to find a new Ob So I went with a female doctor and I have been pretty comfortable with her over the past 2 years.

Jenn0810 · June 2012

I had to have a male doctor during my last pregnancy for one of my last visits before giving birth. My real doctor was on vacation. I was a little nervous but DH was with me (we were there for a non-stress test, etc. that day too so he came). My regular female dr was more painful with the internals than the male dr I had. it didn't hurt at all with him. I was very surprised! He had me lift myself off the table a bit when he did the internal which must have done the trick. He was very nice and easy to talk to. If I were you I'd look at the male dr reviews, etc. and choose one that is good. Try him out and if you are still uncomfortable then go somewhere else. They see so many V's a day that it's nothing to them.

mben1119 · June 2012

nallsl:
I personally don't care either way, but my husband insists on me having a female. He does have a good point; females generally have much smaller hands. LOL

Your husband sounds like an idiot.

mben1119 · June 2012

Honestly, they're a doctor. A trained professional. It isn't like you're picking a random man off the street to do your exams and deliver your baby.

April+ · June 2012

If you decide to stick with the male I am pretty sure you will get used to it. I have been to a male gyno a couple times and one of my REs is a male and I am totally comfortable with it because I just know that this is what they do ALL day!

FutureMrsTowns · June 2012

nallsl:
I personally don't care either way, but my husband insists on me having a female. He does have a good point; females generally have much smaller hands. LOL

lol!!!

My hubby insists I see a female too. I didn't tell him at first but my RE was a male(only one in the practice) and he didn't really say it but he was upset when I told him....

LaurelBee · June 2012

I'm shocked at those who have H's that care if their OB is male. Grow the eff up.

I used to have a female OB until I got pg. Then I met with all the Drs in my office and the male ones were my favs. They were gentler during exams, stuck around a little longer to answer my questions, and treated me kindlier. Plus, the female OB who did my 6w Pp checkup had the hugest hands I'd ever seen. She literally busted a stitch while checking things out... Go to the person who will give you and your baby the best care, do not decide by who has a penis and who doesn't.

meansbaby2013 · June 2012

I thought it would be weird to have a male OB, but with my first pregnancy, I had a male. Actually, he went to school with my dad and I went to school with his daughter. I think you will get used to it. Good luck!

JoJo1111 · June 2012

FYI hand size has very little to do with the pain factor it is the length of the OB's fingers. Doctors and nurses with short fingers have to push harder to get their fingers up to your cervix, making it more uncomfortable. Of course there are always rough ones who are going to cause you pain regardless of finger length.

sesigs · June 2012

Mommyluv384:
I go to a male doctor he is wonderful.
If I were you, I would try the new male doctor for the first appt to see if you like him and how you feel and take it from there, if you feel uncomfortable after meeting him then change doctors office

This. My doctor is also male and I love him. If you've never seen a male doctor before it's worth it to at least try since it sounds like you really love that practice!

MrsPandolph · June 2012

Thanks for all the insight. i have been seen by both of the male OBs when they were on call and i was in the hospital during my first pregnancy for high BP. one of them was nice but extremely intimidating (probably because my condition was serious) and the other one seemed rushed and busy (but i don't know the situations he may have had other than mine that evening). My husband has convinced me I shouldn't judge them on the one time i met them and he said I should give it a try as well.

I have decided I will stay with this practice and take one of the male OBs if necessary. I did however get a call back today from the nurse and she scheduled my first appointment with their PA for the doc I really wish to get. She said if by the time i need my second appointment the doc can take a new patient I will be able to see her

Thanks again!

martha919 · June 2012

For those of you who think it's "ridiculous" that a woman's SO would express discomfort at her seeing a male OB, I think it's "ridiculous" that a SO's opinion would mean so little. If my hubby's uncomfortable with something, we talk about it and figure out a solution. I'm guessing the ladies who listened to their SO's concerns were thinking about the happiness of both of the partners in the relationship, not just their own. Selflessness is crucial to happy relationships. Just sayin'.

CallMeLauraJane · June 2012

martha919:
For those of you who think it's "ridiculous" that a woman's SO would express discomfort at her seeing a male OB, I think it's "ridiculous" that a SO's opinion would mean so little. If my hubby's uncomfortable with something, we talk about it and figure out a solution. I'm guessing the ladies who listened to their SO's concerns were thinking about the happiness of both of the partners in the relationship, not just their own. Selflessness is crucial to happy relationships. Just sayin'.

I absolutely respect my husband's opinion.

But, my husband doesn't have his head so far up his bum and have jealousy issues that would ever hinder me having a male OB. It's closeminded and reeks of confidence issues.

In an act of selflessness, you (or she) should try to get him to lighten up a bit.

MadeOfAwesome · June 2012

martha919:
For those of you who think it's "ridiculous" that a woman's SO would express discomfort at her seeing a male OB, I think it's "ridiculous" that a SO's opinion would mean so little. If my hubby's uncomfortable with something, we talk about it and figure out a solution. I'm guessing the ladies who listened to their SO's concerns were thinking about the happiness of both of the partners in the relationship, not just their own. Selflessness is crucial to happy relationships. Just sayin'.

I can almost guarantee that there was no "talking it out to find a solution" with these guys. My husband isn't a jackass and only wants the best care for me and our unborn child regardless of the gender of the doctor providing that care.

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