So, I might be overreacting but my mom really hurt my feelings. She is pretty notorious for saying off the wall things/rude things and never filtering herself or thinking of others feelings. I picked her and my dad up from the airport and she asked how I was feeling etc. Then she said, "i'm just praying you have a boy" in the most sad/desperate voice. I immediately said, "please don't say stuff like that, b/c if I have another girl I know you'll be disappointed and that really hurts my feelings". Her reply was, "but if you have a boy you'll have the million dollar family" (i'm assuming this means my family will be perfect). I replied that my family will be perfect just the way it is.
It really frustrates me that people put so much weight on having one of each or especially having a boy. It's like this added pressure in my family sort of on both sides b/c my husbands brother has a girl too and i know his parents are chomping at the bit for a boy. has anyone with 2+children had any experiences like this?
Re: Keep your gender wishes to yourself mom
I only have one but I know what you mean... I get the pressure too and I just say "Boy or Girl" baby will be loved just the same. I too wish people would keep those comments inside where they don't hurt mother's to be.
I'm sorry she was so lame
Why does everyone think that STMs are hoping for their 2nd to be opposite? It does make me feel bad for the babies- like they aren't good enough bc they weren't a certain sex.
My Mil did that with my 1st. She already had a grandson, so she told me she was hoping for a girl. I told her that my baby was growing a penis as we spoke bc she jinxed herself! Now my Sil's expecting another boy and who knows what this lil peanut will be. Probably a boy
I got an email from my FIL yesterday that was a forward from someone I've never met saying "tell T & M we hope it's a boy and it's not a redhead". First off, we haven't even told all my family and a lot of our friends yet so I was mad that FIL is not respecting our privacy wishes and then some random person has an opinion on the sex and looks of our baby. Come on now! I'm assuming it will just get worse though...
You're gonna have a million dollar family no matter what though! I hope this doesn't get you down too much, your mom will obviously love her grandbaby no matter what!
lol - nice one!
Sorry about your mom, I'm annoyed for you!
I'm already getting this from both sides of the family. With this pregnancy being twins, and we know they are fraternal, everyone keeps saying they want us to have one of each so we can be done.
My husband actually would love to have twin girls, haha! In all honesty though my husband and I just want to have 2 healthy babies regardless of gender. That is my response to everyone, esp. my BIL that keeps trying to get me to agree with him that I'd like for it to be a boy/girl twin set.
Who said we are only having 2 children? Why would we need to done with this pregnancy so all the pressure on the genders right now? Annoying...
I'm so sorry she's acting like this. I desperately want all girls! lol But as long as it's healthy I'll be happy. Unfortunately, you may just have to brush off the rude comments. You can't live up to her ideals, they're unrealistic. And I'm sure once the baby is born she will love it regardless.
and there is my vent for today lol
Something along those lines since she obviously doesn't get it or doesn't care that it makes you feel bad. Just turn it around on her and make her feel bad! Ha!
""No one else will ever know the strength of my love for you. After all, you're the only one who knows what my heart sounds like from the inside."
"On the night you were born, the moon smiled with such wonder that the stars peeked in to see you and the night wind whispered "Life will never be the same." Because there had never been anyone like you... ever in the world." ~ Nancy Tillman
Wow! That was really harsh of your mom to say. I think you handled it well by telling her that your family is perfect.
My MIL is the same. She already has two granddaughters so she really wants my LO to be a boy. She is always making comments about how I am having a boy based on stupid old wives tales. But it is so silly.
I think this is so stupid. You dont like people because of their sex, you like them because how they are as people.
Ugh that would make me so mad! Luckily I havent heard any of this yet. I think most people who know me know that we dont plan to be done after this one, anyhow so maybe that is why. I do hope to have a daughter one day but if I have a million boys all as amazing as my son I will be THRILLED.
In some ways I am almost hoping for another boy because it would be so fun for them to be buddies... best man for each other etc. But also would love a girl. So I really dont care and I hope that those around me dont either!
11/18/16 missed m/c 9w1
08/03/17 no hb 8w
I like this response. While I'm a FTM, I've already gotten multiple, "I hope it's a girl" comments. While I'd love to have a girl, our number one priority is a healthy baby. I shouldn't have to feel nervous to tell all of the above mentioned people that it's a boy, yet I am.
Sorry that your mom was so rude, I'd be upset too. I definitely like the above response though, perhaps it will teach her to keep her mouth shut!
BFP #1 5/12/12; EDD 1/20/13; Eliana Grace born 1/25/13
BFP #2 12/11/13; EDD 8/23/14; M/C 6 weeks
BFP #3 4/3/14; EDD 12/13/14
My husband has a daughter from a previous marriage, and this is our first child together. He is the last male on his side of the family so all of his family, including him, have been saying that it has to be a boy. It's a little frustrating...his aunt has already come up with boy names (yes because she will be the one naming our child
) and any time they ask about how I'm doing they refer to the baby as a boy. It's all a little ridiculous. All they seem to want is a boy and all I want is a healthy baby.
26 years old, married since June 2009, DS born 1/19/13
Dear Baby Pacheco...
If this LO is a girl, her middle name will be "Jane" after my favorite "Maiden" aunt, My mothers sister. Since I told my mom that plan, shes been rooting for a boy, so that my aunt "Wouldn't have that much power over the baby"
Majorly F-ed up.
3 IUIs to get BFP w/baby #2
Lost baby #2 at nearly 12 weeks (D&C on 9/19/14)
I only have 1 little guy but I'm getting the same thing.
It seems like whenever I tell someone I'm pregnant they immediately say "Oh! I hope it's a girl!" All my family members have a "feeling" it's a girl... don't get me wrong, I'd love a girl but I'd also love a boy and I think that if it's a boy and people "pity" me about it I'm going to get stabby.
I find all of your posts awesome.
Seriously?!? He hopes your hypathetical son is not a redhead?!? Am I the only one who thinks this is absolutely ridiculous?? Maybe I'm hyper-annoyed bc I am a redhead. But that statement would've assed me up in a BIG way.
Um not just you. Redhead here too and that comment really rubbed me wrong. Yes, growing up as a redhead and all the names I was called I would not wish that on my child at all (and there are still comment and lines today that get me). But I can say that from experience, not just because I don't like the color. It's one of those things that you have to be one to make that kind of comment, otherwise it's totally uncalled for/rude/hurtful.
I love this comment, definitely tucking it away in case I run into this situation.
BFP 8.14.15 ~~ Due 4.22.16