Preemies

Went back to the hospital this week..

Not for myself or the girls, but to drop off some things to someone who just had twins herself. It was so strange to go back to the ante floor, and to see my old room (her room was right across the hall from where I lived for 6 weeks!). I don't think that I've been back to the hospital since the day we left the NICU with Charlotte.

It was especially weird because I was admitted the day before Thanksgiving last year and this was two days before it. So, the Christmas decorations were up, just like they were when I was admitted and for most of my time there. It all looked exactly the same. I felt like if I walked down the hall to the NICU, my girls would still be there, tiny again.

The strangest part was that, of course, I washed my hands the minute that I got to her room. I realized after I left that my hands smelled like the NICU. I used my own handsoap while I was hospitalized, but used the hospital soap in the NICU. That smell completely brought me back to the NICU days.

I cried the whole way to work afterwards. I guess there are just a lot of old feelings left.

Re: Went back to the hospital this week..

  • i havent been back to the high risk floor or nicu of my hospital since i left. i was there for almost 13 weeks 3 yrs ago. i'm pg with #3 and i might have to revist both places. it makes me cry just thinking about it. i know how you feel

     

  • The smell gets me.

    Even when we were still in the NICU but had been moved to the step down unit.. when Robbie had surgery, we were back down in ICU.. Just walking in the door, the smell of that end of the hospital made my stomach churn.

    They say smell is the strongest sense for affecting the memory.. I believe it.

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  • I had something similar happen recently... we went to visit a friend and her baby was in Emma's exact location. I LOST it when I left the hospital :( And you're right, the smell of that soap can take you back in an instant!
    Emma - March '08 Quinn - August '11
    Need help with high fat food ideas? Chunky Monkey
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