New - Would like to meet all of you! — The Bump
Childless not by choice

New - Would like to meet all of you!

I just found this board! I wish I had of awhile ago, but better late than never!

I was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer shortly after my 24th birthday, Stage 2. I am now cancer free, and my fiance and I are getting married Sept 22. Things are great on that side, but I have had a really hard time recently with the fact I can't have children.

We are looking into adoption and taking that route, but that doesn't take away the sting of not being able to have our own biological child :(

Re: New - Would like to meet all of you!

  • Hello. Congratulations on being cancer free and good luck with your wedding! This board is for ladies who are at the end of all roads, including adoption, and will not be having children at all. I know you will still struggle with the emotional aspects of not having biological children, but the fact that you're pursuing other means of parenting means may not be the board for you. Feel free to lurk, but I think the adoption board might be a more appropriate place for you. I'm not trying to sound harsh, this just isn't a board people "graduate" from.

     Good luck!

    Also, there's a member on the Trouble TTC board named Pulga. She recently was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and had a total hysterectomy - she might be a good person to contact as you probably share some similar thoughts and feelings because of your medical history.

    ETA: I just realized Pulga has intro'd here since adoption isn't on the horizon for them in the foreseeable future until she achieves a cancer-free status. Still - community is important, and you two may find support in each other.

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  • Welcome! The board is not the most active but it is a great group of women

     

    "Onward"--CathyMD Waiting since 07/5/2011 for our forever child! Yep we are adopting!
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  • Yes, the adoption route is one that rides on whether the doctors can give the go ahead... so at this time, that's not a given yet either... Praying that come the wedding, as they are letting us do the initial classes, hopefully I can get that all clear and be able to move forward with it! I don't know what the regulations are like in the US, but with us right now although I'm 'cancer free' and just on follow up checks, that doesn't mean they consider you in the clear yet... still going for regular follow ups and praying for the best!

    I will definitely look her up, having someone else to talk to who understands so much of what you're going through is an amazing opportunity, thank you for directing me her way. 

  • Welcome to the board! it's not very active around here but everyone is very nice.  I'm so sorry to hear about your cancer and your being un able to have children. It just plain stinks!  I've just replied to your PM
  • I just wanted to say congrat's on the cancer free. I had cervical cancer and cancer treatments for it and was told I would never be able to have children. I did suffer two second trimester losses (24 and 20 weeks)  .. and then had more treatments.   =(   Well I was told I would not be able to have any kids ever. Well .. years went by and imagine my shock when I am in the hospital for the flu and find out I am pregnant with twins? Well... they told me my body probably won't carry them to term. I would not terminate though I had to give it a try. They gave me a cerclage at 13 weeks ... I am now going on 24 weeks and so far the babies both look good but we still don't know if my body will carry the babies long enough for them to live outside me. I am hoping and praying for a miracle!!!! It's been a long road and one full of all sorts of emotions. I still have a hard time around people's babies .. when I just want one of my own so bad. Seems like everyone around me has a newborn or is happily pregnant. 

    Good luck on getting a baby ... I know in the state of Michigan where I am the state will assist families in adopting babies and kids from foster care. So maybe you could look into that in your state. There's mothers whom already lost parental rights for LIFE and are pregnant again .. so those babies are taken right at birth. This was what I was going to try ... adopting from foster care. 

     

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  • Welcome! The board is not the most active but it is a great group of women

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