Opinions on when to have next baby

sroddy12 · June 2012

Just curious as to when people are planning on having their next baby. I would also love to hear from moms who have more than one child. How far apart in age are they and would you have waited longer or had them closer together? Id like to start trying again when LO is 10 months old but not sure if thatll be too close in age.

treble_clef · June 2012

If my daughter was our first baby, I would have wanted to have another one right away. My son, who is now a wonderful young man, used to be a super needy difficult baby. As a FTM, he really traumatized me, lol!

However, when I was finally ready to have another one when my son was 2 and a half, I had a miscarriage, and then more infertility issues. So my kids are almost 5 years apart. My son is already big enough to do many things by himself and good at following instructions, so it's physically easier for me to have this age gap than having 2 under 2. Sometimes I wish they were closer in age, but my son is now like my mini husband:) He helps me a lot, and I kind of rely on him too!

KateLouise · June 2012

Our two are two years apart, and it's been a really good age gap for us.

if I was younger (I'm 34) I'd go with a 3 year gap next, purely because I can have up to 24months maternity leave, but have to work 12months between maternity leaves, so that means a minimum of a 3 year gap, if I toook the full 24 months.

because of my age and us wanting at least one, and maybe 2 more children, I'm looking at another 2 yr gap.

I would only want the 3 yr gap to allow me to spend as much time at home with my kids as possible.

elacey · June 2012

My first two are 21 months apart and while that age gap was very doable it was definitely more challenging! Two in diapers, two bedtime routines, just two needy kids. The age gape between 2 and 3 is a little over 3 years and it is much easier. The older two can do a lot of things for themselves now and had a much easier time adjusting to having a baby in the house. My 3 year old is potty trained and can get in and out of the car on her own. I don't know that I would have chosen to space my kids three years apart though because I wanted this phase of life compacted so we could move onto our next phase. I think whatever spacing you choose will have its advantages and disadvantages!

WIAgrrrr · June 2012

My girls are almost 3 years apart. I like the age difference as by the time the 2nd one came along my oldest had some independence and was able to do some things herself. I didn't have 2 in diapers so that was nice too. The only reason I'd want them closer is so my older one had a playmate. But she has friends at daycare/church/neighbors, so she is fine. She is helpful with the baby.

meg_2006 · June 2012

We're going to start trying next summer. We're aiming for spring to early summer '14. I'm a teacher, so if I have one in the spring that means I could get 4-5 months off for maternity leave. It works perfectly b/c DH wants them 2 yrs apart. I was hoping for a bit longer, but the time frame for maternity leave works out perfectly so I guess he will get his way after all

I'm just not looking forward to having 2 in diapers!

Pumpkin62307 · June 2012

My son was 27 months old when his little sister was born. We tried to potty train him beforehand, but it didn't happen, so we do have 2 in diapers. So far it's been a pretty good age gap. DS can do somethings by himself, but he does still need a lot of help. But he loooooves his baby sister! I would probably go crazy if they were any closer together! 3 years is probably just about perfect I would say!

ryry1977 · June 2012

My 2 are 2 years and 5 months apart and it has been great. I planned on them closer...just didn't happen. When DS was 12 months I was ready for another baby! Crazy, but I was. We started trying a couple of months after that. DS has been great with DD and that age range has worked out wonderful. DS can play on the playground without me right behind him, plays well on his own at home, and just loves his little sister.

That all being said my next baby I have been deciding how long to wait. I want 3 altogether. I am already 34, so don't want to wait too long. I plan on a 2-3 year age gap for my youngest 2. But not sure yet.

DBride2006 · June 2012

Mine are JUST over 3 years apart. I wanted them 2.5 years apart, but that wasn't in the cards for us and now I am SO thankful. DS1 is so much more independent, potty trained, can get himself in the car, put on his own shoes, etc. He's SUCH a big helper, but also has his own little life (with daycare, grandparents, etc.) They actually already "play" together (or at least entertain eachother) much more than I would have expected. I am really glad for our spread and if we have another, I would aim for 3 year again.

olga&shaun · June 2012

DD and DS is 20 months apart, and let me tell you, it's not always easy! I wouldn't change anything though, DD absolutely adores her baby brother, but it's tough on her still being a baby herself. I think we sometimes expect too much of her. If I look at her now, being a few days short of 2 years, she's grown SO much in the last few months, compared to what she was like when DS was born. So I would suggest to not have a smaller gap than 2 years. I think 2-3 years is perfect. They're still close enough to be friends, but not too close either.?

k.linn · June 2012

Pumpkin62307:
My son was 27 months old when his little sister was born. We tried to potty train him beforehand, but it didn't happen, so we do have 2 in diapers. So far it's been a pretty good age gap. DS can do somethings by himself, but he does still need a lot of help. But he loooooves his baby sister! I would probably go crazy if they were any closer together! 3 years is probably just about perfect I would say!

this is exactly us. I think the age gap is perfect--far enough apart that DD can be fairly independent, but close enough that I think they'll be buddies. I would love to get pregnant again when DS is 18 months, but be Susie of childcare we will wait until DD starts kindergarten--so 3 years.

salt78 · June 2012

Never.

And I really don't think it matters what other people say. If you guys are ready to TTC again when LO is 10 months then that is the right time for you. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer to this.

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