October 2011 Moms

wwyd? possible baby mama drama.

before me a my kids daddy became a couple 5 yrs ago, we were friends. He had been with this woman for like 2 yrs and were engaged. Then she told him she cheated on him. They broke up off an on over the next few months. then she got pregnant. She told him the baby wasnt his. He tried to get back with her cause he thought the baby was his. She told him the baby 100% was not his and she moved like 12 hours away to be with some guy that was sappoed to be the babies dad. He tried to talk to her family but they all told him to move on the baby wasnt his. about a year later me and him became more then friends and moved in togather and had our babies. So for 6 years we havent heared from her and bf asumed baby wasnt his. BUT last night she sent me a friend request on facebook. i accepted and learned a few things 1. she has moved back and lives like 3 hours away.2. she has another baby by a man shes not with. and 3. Her oldest (the baby that she swore was someone elses) looks just like my bf and our kids. now idk what to do? should i tell my bf that the kid is most likely his after all? or just wait to see if she contacts him? i feel that she is looking for drama by sending a friend request.

Re: wwyd? possible baby mama drama.

  • Why didnt he go to court and get a paternity test? If he really thought the kid was his why did he let her just take the baby? He can go to court and try to file for visitation and get paternity established. He will probably have to start paying child support if it turns out the kid is his and the mom could possibly be awarded back support.
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  • also she posted a status saying " its hard not to think about 2 certin men when you look at there clones everyday, guess i will have to love them from a far" i am almost 100% sure that boy is his. i am so angry right now because all these yrs he has been kept from his child, and my kids prob have a brother they dont know. i know he prob could her to court and demaned a dna test yrs ago but still
  • You should call Maury?

    But seriously, there is no reason for you to have accepted her friend request. 

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  • imagestarlite24:
    also she posted a status saying " its hard not to think about 2 certin men when you look at there clones everyday, guess i will have to love them from a far" i am almost 100% sure that boy is his. i am so angry right now because all these yrs he has been kept from his child, and my kids prob have a brother they dont know. i know he prob could her to court and demaned a dna test yrs ago but still

    She didn't keep the baby from him, he chose to not be in the kids life.

  • Wait for her to contact him.  She's definitely trying to stir the pot by FRing you, you shouldn't have accepted, and if you did you should have/need to tell him about it and let him take it from there.
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  • imagecantalopes24:

    imagestarlite24:
    also she posted a status saying " its hard not to think about 2 certin men when you look at there clones everyday, guess i will have to love them from a far" i am almost 100% sure that boy is his. i am so angry right now because all these yrs he has been kept from his child, and my kids prob have a brother they dont know. i know he prob could her to court and demaned a dna test yrs ago but still

    She didn't keep the baby from him, he chose to not be in the kids life.

    i really disagree. He tried. but she took off with the guy that was sapposed to have been the dad. he didnt know where they went to and her family wouldnt tell. He loved this girl and was crushed even after she cheated.
  • imagecantalopes24:

    imagestarlite24:
    also she posted a status saying " its hard not to think about 2 certin men when you look at there clones everyday, guess i will have to love them from a far" i am almost 100% sure that boy is his. i am so angry right now because all these yrs he has been kept from his child, and my kids prob have a brother they dont know. i know he prob could her to court and demaned a dna test yrs ago but still

    She didn't keep the baby from him, he chose to not be in the kids life.

    i really disagree. He tried. but she took off with the guy that was sapposed to have been the dad. he didnt know where they went to and her family wouldnt tell. He loved this girl and was crushed even after she cheated.
  • I think thsy moving away and repeatedly denying he was the father is keeping sais child away from his father and not his fault.

    I agree by adding her you are letting in the drama 

    also just because a child resembles someone does not mean he is the father. People see what they want to see. not saying thst he is not the fathet just saying its possible

     


  • imageWineBaby22:

    I don't know, I think moving away and repeatedly telling him it wasn't his child is pretty much keeping the baby from him. I still agree that he should have gotten a paternity test if he thought there was a chance.

    I agree with PP's- you shouldn't have accepted her friend request, but what's done is done. I'd probably tell my SO because it sounds like this girl is going to be contacting him regardless.

    But if he knew she moved 12 hours away to be with some guy I'm assuming he had to have some idea of where she went. If he was that convinced and cared he would have done something.

     

  • i realize i shouldnt have accepted it but my curosity got the best of me. i have always wondered in the back of my mind about the baby eventhough i really didnt think it was his.
  • imagecantalopes24:

    imageWineBaby22:

    I don't know, I think moving away and repeatedly telling him it wasn't his child is pretty much keeping the baby from him. I still agree that he should have gotten a paternity test if he thought there was a chance.

    I agree with PP's- you shouldn't have accepted her friend request, but what's done is done. I'd probably tell my SO because it sounds like this girl is going to be contacting him regardless.

    But if he knew she moved 12 hours away to be with some guy I'm assuming he had to have some idea of where she went. If he was that convinced and cared he would have done something.

     

    he didnt find out that she moved 12 hours away untill a few yrs ago and even then no one told him exactally where. only that the baby def was not his.
  • i will be talking to him about this when he comes home. i myself am still in shock. i grew up not knowing my dad and had half siblings that i still have never met. if i had thought this baby was his i would have pushed and pushed for him to find her. this baby has every right to know his dad and his brother and sister.
  • You don't know that the baby is his. The mom has repetedly said it isn't. If your bf thinks it is he should have a paternity test done. It doesn't sound like you were ever close to his ex, so I wouldn't have accepted that request. But since you did and think that he looks like your kids and your bf about the only thing to do is tell your bf these things and see what he says. It's possibly his kid not yours so ultimately what happens is up to him. While it does effect your life and your kids it really is between your bf and his ex. All you can do is tell him what you think and then try to support him in this time regardless of what happens. 
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  • imageSpinningJess:
    Wait for her to contact him.  She's definitely trying to stir the pot by FRing you, you shouldn't have accepted, and if you did you should have/need to tell him about it and let him take it from there.

    I agree. She is definitely up to something if she just randomely decided to FR you. Let your SO know and just step away and let them deal with eachother. I am sure he is going to ask to see the pictures but let him come to a conclusion, himself, if he thinks the kid looks like him.



    "Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
    "Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
  • supposed not sapposed. thanks.


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  • imageStewartandmaura:
    supposed not sapposed. thanks.
    haha thanks for adding this.
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  • 1-888-456-2879  YWIA

    image



  • imageEloiseWeenieSkipperdee:
    1-888-456-2879  YWIA

    Maury or Jerry?

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  • imageMackalien13:
    imageLiz4444:

    imageEloiseWeenieSkipperdee:
    1-888-456-2879  YWIA

    Maury or Jerry?

    That's maury's number. I memorized it by heart when I was on bed rest. Used to watch that shiit everyday. 

    That's his paternity test #  


    image



  • I'm still confused why you accepted the friend request?
  • imageMackalien13:
    imageEloiseWeenieSkipperdee:
    imageMackalien13:
    imageLiz4444:

    imageEloiseWeenieSkipperdee:
    1-888-456-2879  YWIA

    Maury or Jerry?

    That's maury's number. I memorized it by heart when I was on bed rest. Used to watch that shiit everyday. 

    That's his paternity test #  

    Everyday when DH would call at lunch to check on me, I would give him that day's maury report. 

    We were watching Maury in the hospital while I was in labor.  I asked DH if he wanted a parenity test. 

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