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June 2011 Moms
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Non-existent sex drive (possible TMI)

ladybug122ladybug122 member
in June 2011 Moms

Ugh. I still have no sex drive whatsoever. And SO still has his normal sex drive, of course, wanting it every night. So we compromise to every other night, but still it feels like such a chore to me. I enjoy it once we start (ok, maybe a few minutes into it actually), but beforehand I'm just wishing I could go to sleep! 

Anyone else in the same boat still? I still breastfeed many times a day (maybe 5 or 6) and at night, so I think that is why. It sucks though, I used to look forward to sex, not try to avoid it!

For those of you who have no sex drive, if you wish to share, do you still do the deed regularly? Or do you only do it when you actually want to? 

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Re: Non-existent sex drive (possible TMI)

  • Rachel5782Rachel5782 member
    Every other night would be way too much for me, forget every dang night!  I'm so frickin' tired!
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  • M&M227M&M227

    imageRachel5782:
    Every other night would be way too much for me, forget every dang night!  I'm so frickin' tired!

    Yup, this.  We're lucky to get to two times a week at this point.  I'm back on Birth Control and just not into it.   

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  • bt3701bt3701
    Wow, DH would be over the moon with every other day!! I have absolutely zero desire. It just isn't enjoyable for me; I totally get what you say about it being a chore. I wish I wanted to... but between being tired and the body changes of BF, I just don't care. You are not alone!
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  • LaRue86LaRue86
    I was good until about 3 weeks ago. DH doesnt know what to do. With A I wanted sex all the time. This time, please stay away and dont touch me. I can honestly say it has been at least a week.
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  • Birdies08Birdies08 member

    imagebt3701:
    Wow, DH would be over the moon with every other day!! I have absolutely zero desire. It just isn't enjoyable for me; I totally get what you say about it being a chore. I wish I wanted to... but between being tired and the body changes of BF, I just don't care. You are not alone!

    Yup, right there with you. And we can't even make it weekly, which is kind of our goal at this point. We both work and are tired and have crap to do, along with my lack of drive, it's just not happening :( 

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  • CarlaAndJamesCarlaAndJames member
    My drive definitely picked up after I got off the mini pill, and even better once I cut back to nursing only 2x a day. (and, thank you nature, my drive is WAY higher when Im ovulating. Grr!)
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  • magnoliablossom00magnoliablossom00 member

    Ive been more in the mood with this pregnancy, but we still are usually both too tired. I'd say once a week? Twice?

    Before I got pregnant, we would only do it once or twice a month. Zip it!

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  • vanessa999vanessa999
    Definitely no sex drive. DH has his normal sex drive wanting it all the time but I just have no desire and haven't had any desire since I got pregnant. It has been a source of contention between DH and I; he is lucky if we do it once a week. Which is sad because we used to do it everyday, sometimes multiple times, I wish we could get back to that but I am just not feeling it.
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  • ElatedMom2BElatedMom2B member
    What is sex again?
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  • SarahE22ndSarahE22nd member

    Wow....every other day!? 

     It's usually once a week, but there are def weeks where it doesn't happen at all (between both of us working, his crazy hours and my lack of sleep)

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  • IdigDirtIdigDirt member
    DH is lucky if we do it every other month. He used to have to beat me back with a stick but now he is coming to me for sex and I turn him down. I hate this but I have no desire at all.
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  • cvl105cvl105 member
    every other day...I can't even imagine. Even if I wanted it, I don't think I'd have the energy. Good for you guys.
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  • ShandaBShandaB
    Every other day!!  I'm exhausted just thinking about it.  You're DH should consider himself one of the lucky ones.
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  • SarahKate31SarahKate31 member
    Wow, every other day! Neither of us seems interested enough to do anything about it these days.
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  • jcsumm0jcsumm0 member

    imageShandaB:
    Every other day!!  I'm exhausted just thinking about it.  You're DH should consider himself one of the lucky ones.

    This! 

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  • march2008march2008 member
    I've never had that amount of drive, even before the pregnancy and breastfeeding. It's definitely a little lower right now (still BFing), but I'm happy with once a week. DH would definitely prefer it more often than me and sometimes I do it when I'd rather sleep, but it's just because I know I'll enjoy it once it gets going.
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  • ladybug122ladybug122 member

    imageCarlaAndJames:
    My drive definitely picked up after I got off the mini pill, and even better once I cut back to nursing only 2x a day. (and, thank you nature, my drive is WAY higher when Im ovulating. Grr!)

    I guess there is still hope for me!

    It's good to know there are still a lot of yall in the same boat as me. I'll have to tell SO that he is lucky to get it every other night! 

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  • Magenta728Magenta728 member
    Every other day!! Wow! I have ZERO sex drive, but I "force" myself to do it 1-2x week. 
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  • CantWait2BeCantWait2Be member
    Dh and I haven't had sex since before ds was born. I have no drive and right now am too stressed and not attracted to him because he makes me stressed and all we do is argue. 
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  • kas80kas80 member

    My sex drive is just now starting to come back at all.  I definitely do think it's linked to BFing.  I am in the boat of thinking that regular sex is a must for a happy marriage so we make time for it a minimum of 2-3 times a week.  Even if it's not on the top of my list of priorities.

     

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