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Any advice for getting almost 4 year old to sleep in their own room all night

ling79ling79 member
in Pre-School and Daycare

Last night was the last straw lol! It was a bad night in this house.  DS usually falls asleep in his room with us laying with him (mistake #1)  he then comes into our room around 1 or 2 and lays on the floor in a little fold out couch we have for him there.  Last night he was throwing a tantrum that he needed to sleep in our bed.  We gave that up about 2 years ago and are NOT going backwards lol.

We denied saying it was mommy's and daddy's bed.  If he wants to come up in our bed he can only when the sun comes up for a liitle bit.  The screaming, and pleading went on for about a half hour, but then I was so worked up I didn't fall asleep for a long time longer.  

Today I already told him he was punished and no TV for the day because he acted out so bad last night, not sure if that is completely appropriate but I said it and now will follow thru with it.

Any advice for a 4 year old to stay in their room all night? TIA

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Re: Any advice for getting almost 4 year old to sleep in their own room all night

  • EchowyspEchowysp member

    If I had it, I'd give it.  We go through something very similar.  My ds has always had sleep problems (didn't STTN regularly until 3, had lots of nightmares and terrors, needed us to lay with him, slept in our bed, etc.). 

    I figure it's a phase.  Most friends with older kids say it's normal and they outgrow it, so I go with the flow.  I have a LO to keep me up several times a night, so if ds wants to climb in or sleep on the pillows next to my bed, I say just don't wake me up and we're fine.  

    I'd encourage that if he can't stay in his bed, to only sleep on the cot in your room and to not disturb you.  I don't know if punishment during the day works (never did for us) because they aren't always fully awake and rational to make good decision based on losing a privilege the next day, kwim?  Maybe a sticker chart with "I stayed in bed all night" with a reward at the end?

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  • stdldb29stdldb29

    As hard as it is in the middle of the night, take him back to his room every single time he comes in your room. Move the little couch out and tell him that is your room, that he is 4 years old and too big to be sleeping in your room. 

    I think the punishment is just fine, my DS doesn't watch much TV, so we take away play time outside. Ticks him off when we do that.  

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  • rsd12rsd12 member
    Our 4 yr old still joins us once and a while. It has gotten so much better, a year ago it was 3 times a week and now it is once a month. I don't mind anymore, if that is what he needs right now. I know he won't be doing this as a teenager ; ) sometimes he will ask to go back to his own room. The best way I have learned to get sleep is to turn away from him and go back to sleep and not engage in aanyway!
    Boy 1 2/06 - Boy 2 12/07 - Boy 3 9/09
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  • Osco13Osco13

    We just conquered a fear of the dark phase with our almost 4 year old. He has always been a great sleeper so this threw us for a loop!

    Here's what we did:

    We spent a little extra time before bed talking about being brave.

    Checked out some library books about brave kiddos.

    Got a calendar and some awesome stickers and talked about earning a sticker for sleeping through the night. If he managed it for a whole week there was a reward.

    By night 2 he woke up at normal wake time yelling "DID I GET A STICKER!!!!". Once he made it a full week of stickers he picked out a prize at the toy store.  It literally took ONE WEEK.

    Now we only give stickers if he asks but he feels alot of pride about being brave.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
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