Parenting
Options
Is this strange?
I just received an evite for my cousin's wife's surprise baby shower. A friend of hers is throwing a party. So the invite is for a restaurant - it gives time and address. Then it says "each guest is responsible for their own food and drinks".
Would this be a little strange to you?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Is this strange?
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
I think that is tacky, especially if you are expected to order something. I feel if someone is hosting that is part of the responsibilities or chose another location.
I'd say I'm a bit on the fence here - Do I think it has an element of tackiness? You better believe it... Do I think showers are super expensive and fronting the bill yourself for everything can be overwhelming? Oh yea... I also think it's a bit rude unless the guest list is super small to expect a waiter/ress to have to keep track of a large group as individuals instead of as a whole...
While it may sit a bit wrong with me, in a way I'd be glad that they were up front about it ahead of time and am hoping it's an affordable family-type restaurant where the prices aren't out of people's budgets and that either a link or copy of the menu was included if you aren't a local...
I'm not a follower of proper etiquette mostly (I despise it, it's old and outdated), but having a shower where guests buy their own food and drink is atrocious, IMO. Obviously the host doesn't have enough money.
Cousin's wife's shower - if you're not very close, I wouldn't go. Send her a gift and be done with it. That shower sounds full of "Oh my...." moments.
If I attend a party where it's customary to bring a gift, I would expect to not also pay for my food and drink.
A pp mentioned going out for dinner to celebrate someone's birthday - sure, fine, I will pay for my own meal and a portion of the person whose birthday is being celebrated, but then I don't also bring a gift.
Showers are traditionally gift-giving occasions, where I am from.
Now that would royally P*** me off!!! If you can't afford your own RD, then have a pizza party or a backyard bbq... Heck, KFC offers a $7/pp option for catering and Pizza Hut has a $10 dinner box - it won't break the bank to stick to a budget!!
Strange, yes since I've never been to one like that, but honestly, I wouldn't be too upset. I would make sure I brought cash so I could just leave my portion.
...baby #3 is here...
This
surprise shower for a cousin~ Rude.
However this is common (not stated) when we have a shower for a co-worker (co-workers only/intimate gathering shower)...even if there is a planner, someone making the reservations for a large group/setting the date and maybe a few decor.
This isn't strange, it's downright rude. You get to bring a gift for the shower *and* pay for your meal at a restaurant you didn't choose? Boy, how lucky are you!
Seriously, the hosts should have a gathering they can afford without burdening the guests. If that's cupcakes and punch, great. If it's a meal at a restaurant, great. But it's completely inappropriate to ask guests to bring a gift and buy their meals as well.