Any one else doing it alone — The Bump
Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Any one else doing it alone

May is a busy month for DH company. I knew this all along. However when he can help he doesn't. He always says"I have to work or I have to get up early. I get that you have to be up at 5 however I haven't went to sleep. I am the sole caregiver day and night. When my DH comes home he doesn't take over. As of Monday he slows down and will be home much more. I am hoping he starts to take charge a little. If he doesn't we will be having a talk. I need a good nights rest and my house is a disaster. 
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Re: Any one else doing it alone

  • Lol. Does your hubby work for the same company as mine? End of their fiscal year too! Same thing, he iwll be more free as of tomorrow. But he has still been helping a ton and getting up for one of the night feedings/changings and still takes over once he is back from work... But I could use more help for sure! He doesnt get home until 8:30 or 9!
  • raynesraynes
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    I'm mostly in the same boat.  H has been working on two jobs the last 2 weeks and will often be gone from 6am to 9 or 10 pm.  At that point I know he's exhausted and that last thing he wants to do is tidy the kitchen, or take the screaming baby (of course his fussy time is right when H has been getting home) but it's haaaard.  Especially when LO decides to have the kind of night that keeps me on the couch instead of in bed.

    So, yeah, I feel your pain.

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  • jp0129jp0129 member
    Yeah I spend many nights on the couch. 
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  • I am with you! My DH drives for hIs job so needs his rest and gets up early. He is also not handling the newborn phase well, he has no patience. So I find myself taking LO back from him because it is just easier to do it myself. Would be nice to have a small break when he gets home...
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  • I had a c-section, so DH took two weeks off with me to help out.  He went back to work for 2 days and then was home with strep for a week.  When he went back to work, he knew he was going to have to get his tonsils out and be down for 2 weeks, so he worked overtime in order to not have to use up all his sick time.  He worked round the clock, and even the things I had planned for months and he was going to watch LO, I ended up taking her with me so he could work.  He helps out when he can, but he needs his sleep and wha tnot more than I do right now because I can sleep with LO sleeps.

    With that said, dont worry about your house!!  It is never going to be perfect again, and that is perfect!

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  • I've been doing everything alone since my DD was 6 weeks old. My hubby is deployed and my family is 1700+ miles away. I work full time as a teacher so nothing is ever totally done...

     

    just make sure you and your LO are taken care of and happy...

     

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  • My hubby travels for work so is gone most weeks. I do it alone M-F. It can be hard but we never have arguments over who gets the night feeding ;)
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  • yes! DH works two jobs, some days he will go all day without holding our son. he says he will be more involved when ds can interact more. its so annoying, I need to talk to him about it. your not alone.
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  • My DH is out of town for work until September... He left last week.  So yes, I'm doing it alone until September anyway.  And then he'll probably be home for about a month before he's gone again from Oct - late November/early December, if I had to guess.  But I married him knowing he does what he does, and we had a kid knowing it too.  Doesn't make it easier though.  I'm blessed with a fairly easy child, except when he's in a growth spurt - ha.  Still, would be nice to have another set of hands around to just pass DS off to if need be.  All that said, if DH was home and not present, I would be waaaaay more frustrated than being here alone.  So I'm sorry you're going through this.  Sucks. :(
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  • FI lives in a completely different country! im living with my mom and she only took a couple days off to help me, and by helping all she does is hold him and burp  him. everything else i do by myself and then when she gets home from work she gets upset that i cant keep up with my share of chores. and all FI gets to do is look at and talk to LO through skype :/
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